Read Online Tied With a Bow and No Place to Go (Tizzy/Ridge Trilogy Book 3) by Ann Everett - Free Book Online Page A

up from the one near the entry. “Here they
are.”
    As Jinx opened the door, the two glided in, looking like a
stylish duo of Thelma and Louise, with big sunglasses and bright red lipstick.
Mary Jo removed the scarf from her head, fluffed her dark brown hair and Stella
adjusted her gathered skirt.
    “Mary Jo! Stella! I’m so glad to see y’all,” Pattiecake
trilled. She and Sugarpie took turns giving them hugs and air kisses.
    “These beautiful girls,” Sugarpie said, pointing to the
three pink aprons, “are Pattiecake’s daughter, Tizzy, and the two best
employees a bakery can have, Synola and Rayann. And this is my son Jinx. He’ll
show you to your seats.”
    Next to arrive was Janie Sue Thompson, dressed in a layered
white concoction of tank tops, bra straps, leggings and three-inch white
wedges. Tizzy eyed the frail woman as she pulled a stack of papers from her
oversized straw purse and distributed the flyers.
    “What is this?” Synola asked.
    “Praise the Lord. It’s the answer to the questions of the
universe,” Janie said.
    Tizzy stared at the brochure. “Are you serious? You formed a
religion based on Madonna?”
    Janie gave a vigorous nod. “Amen! The name says it all.
Cosmic, universal. Madonna, goodness. What could be better than that? Madonna
tells us through her songs. I’m a Sinner, Confessions, Angel, Devil Wouldn’t
Recognize You, Like a Virgin. Those are messages to live by. It’s there, girls,
praise be. You just have to believe.”
    “Lord have mercy, you are serious. You want a drink? I sure
could use one,” Tizzy said. “Oh, are Cosmic Madonna’s allowed alcohol?”
    Janie crossed her hands over her chest and looked toward
heaven. “In moderation, praise the Lord.”
    “Roger that,” Synola said. “Make mine a double.”
    Tizzy handed Janie a glass and showed her to her seat.
    Synola grabbed the pitcher of Hop, Skip, and Go Naked,
filled a china cup and downed the liquid in one gulp, then smacked her lips.
“Damn, that is good. Keep 'em coming, because we’re going to need 'em.”
    Rayann moved to stand next to them and said, “The woman who
came in behind the Cosmic Madonna is Neely Simpson. After the weekend, she’s
going to a Hummel convention. How weird is that?”
    Synola flinched. “Hummel convention. They have conventions
to look through a telescope? What the hell?”
    “Humm-el not Hubb-le,” Rayann said. “They’re figurines.
Those little boys and girls dressed in clothes from the Sound of Music.”
    “Oh dear God,” Synola whispered. “We’ve got a cult leader, a
figurine junkie, and three crazy ex-wives. This should be a hell of a party.
Pour me another drink.”
    The three girls turned their attention to the front as
Pattiecake tapped her glass with a spoon. Once the conversation hushed, she
announced, “Welcome everyone. We have a delicious meal coming right up and my
mother-in-law, Nana, has made you a wonderful chocolate brownie treat as a
party favor. Each of you should have one in a small cellophane bag next to your
plate. Along with that, you’ll find a list of this weekend’s activities. I’ve
also placed a pen and card there. If you’ll take a moment to list your current
contact information, address, phone, and email, I’d appreciate it. It’ll also
be helpful to include where you’re staying while here for the reunion.”
    A few minutes later, the door pushed open and everyone
watched the grand entrance of Mayor Lounell Patton, also president of the
Henderson County Red Hat Society. Her bright purple fluttery skirt swished as
she walked, and her cleavage looked like two bald men fighting their way out
the top of her hot pink blouse.
    She stopped short, teetering on red spike heels. “Hello
everyone! As mayor of Brownsboro, I’d like to welcome you home, and thanks to
Pattiecake and Sugarpie for hosting this lovely get-together. Now, let us
observe a moment of silence in remembrance of classmate Jay Roy Hobbs, whom we
so tragically