Read Online Thrown by Tabi Wollstonecraft - Free Book Online Page B

thetearsarestingingmyfaceandIcan’tcatchmybreathbecauseI’m cryingsohard.
    Idon’twanttobewithoutthem.EverythingIdoinmylifewill alwaysfeelalittledullerbecausetheywon’tbeheretoseeit,totalkto me,toadvisemeortolaughwithme.Ialreadyfeelnumbinsidemostof thetimeandI’mtheonewhoisstillaliveandshouldbeexperiencinglife tothefull.Ifeellikemysoulisalreadydeadandburied.TheonlytimeI feelanythingiswhenIcutmyselfandIknowthatisn’thowit’ssupposed tobeandIhavetostopdoingit,Iknowthatbutit’ssohardtogiveupthe onlythingthatallowsyoutofeelaliveifonlyforamoment.Pleasehelp mestop.Pleasehelpmebenormal.
    *
    BythetimeIgetbacktoPromiseHouse,MrTibblesisinthekitchen waitingtobefedbutDellisstillasleep.Shestillhastenminutesbefore heralarmsounds.
    MrTibbleswindshimselfaroundmylegsasIgetacanofcatfood andopenit.Hemeowsasifhe’stellingmetohurry.Igetitintohisdish andhewolfsitdownassoonasIputthedishonthefloor.Igivehima scratchbehindhisearsandsetaboutmakingbreakfastforDellandme.
    ShefinallymakesanappearanceasI’mgettingeverythingoutofthe grillandfryingpans.
    ‘Somethingsmellsamazing,’shesays.
    ‘It’saspecialbreakfastforaspecialperson.’
    ‘Ohboy,don’tstartgoingallsoppyonmynow.Wehaveacoupleof hoursyet.’
    ‘Iknow.It’sjustthatI’mgoingtomissyoulikehell.’
    ‘Metoo.ButatleastwehaveSkypeandHangouts.It’llbejustlike I’mhereintheroomwithyou.Andyouhavetokeepmeupdatedonthe Stokersituation.’
    ‘ThereisnoStokersituation.’
    Shepicksupapieceoftoastandtakesabite.‘Isawthewayhelooked atyouafteryouguyscamebackfromPenzance.Believeme,there’sa Stokersituation.’
    Ishakemyhead.‘Nope.Haven’theardfromhiminawhilenow.’
    ShesitsdownatthetablewhileIdishupthefood.Thekitchenisfull ofthesmellofsausagesandbaconanditsmellssomehowcomforting.
    Aftertoday,Iwillbehavingoatmealforbreakfastbeforegoingtowork intheshopaloneandthenreturningtoaTVdinner.
    MrTibbleslooksupatmewithhisgreeneyesandletsoutapitiful crythatissupposedtomakemefeelsorryforhimandgivehimsome realmeat.ItworksandIputasausageonhisdish.Hetakesabiteand shakeshisheadbecauseit’stoohot.Undeterred,hegrabsthesausageand takesitoutthroughthecatflap.
    ‘I’vebeenthinkingaboutwhyStokerhasn’tcontactedyouyet.’
    ‘OK,let’shearthisgreattheory.’
    ‘Notsomuchtheoryasdeduction.’
    ‘Giveittome.’
    ‘He’swaitinguntilIleave.HeknowsI’monlyhereforaweekandhe doesn’twanttogetintheway.Sohe’skeepinghisdistance.Aftertoday, he’llbeintouch.’
    ‘Ifyousayso.’Itakeourplatestothetableandwestartonthe cookedbreakfast.
    ‘Idosayso.Aww,that’sreallyniceofhimtoresisthisurgesuntilI leave.’
    ‘Urges?’
    ‘Urges.Doweneedtohave‘thetalk’?Hmm?’
    ‘There’snothinglikethatgoingtohappen.Youknowmyexperience withboysandhowitallgoeshorriblywrong.’
    ‘That’sjustbecauseyoudidn’tmeettherightoneyet.Hecouldbethe one.’
    ‘Wow,youhavearealtalentatexaggeratingreality.’
    ‘Ihaveatalentatseeingwhatisrightinfrontofmyeyes,something youshouldtrysometime.’
    ‘You’recrazy,Dell.’
    ‘I’mnotcrazy.EveryoneelseiscrazyandI’mtheonlysanepersonin theworld.’
    ’Sowhatdoyouwanttodothismorning?’
    “We’renotopeningthebookshop?’
    ‘No,Iwanttospendthetimewithyou.’
    ‘Cool.Let’sbumaroundandwatchTV.’
    Ismile.
    ‘Whatyousmilingat?’
    ‘You’renottheonlyonewhocanpredictthings.’
    ‘Hey,predictingthatIwouldwanttostayindoorsandwatchTV
    hardlymakesyoutheAmazingKreskin.’
    ‘Iknowbutit’snicetoknowthatsomethingsneverchange.’
    ‘AndwhatareyougoingtodothisafternoonwhenI’monmywayto theairport?Youcouldopenthestorethentokeepyourselfbusy.’
    ‘Nah,I’mprobablygoingtowatcholdmoviesandeaticecream.’
    ‘Icecream.Iapprove.Buttomorrowwhenyouopenthebookstore, makesureyoulookyourbest.Wearsomethingniceandnotjustthis blackshityouwearallthetime.’
    ’That’srichcomingfromyou.’
    ‘Takemyadvice.Youwanttolookgoodforhim,don’tyou?’
    ‘Who?’Iaskinnocently,knowingwhoshemeansandhopingdeep downthatshe’sright.Dellisgoodatreadingpeople.She’dmakeahell