herself and her family?
She read the letter again
‘
With love from your daughter
Erin
’
She must have sat in the kitchen for hours.
‘You okay, Mum?’ asked her sixteen-year-old daughter Aisling, coming in from school.
‘I’m fine – just feeling a bit tired, love.’ Kate quickly put the letters back in the envelope.
‘I’ve got so much homework it’s unbelievable!’ complained Aisling as she grabbed a drink and a banana. ‘We have a whole page of algebra to do and I haven’t a clue.’
‘Maybe Kevin can help you a bit when he comes in later?’
‘Yeah – he’s the maths genius!’ she grinned.
‘Listen, I think I’ll go up and have a rest for an hour,’ Kate said. ‘I’ll get the dinner later.’
Upstairs in her bedroom she hid the envelope.
Kate had never expected to hear about what happened to her first daughter. It was something that she had accepted would probably secretly gnaw at her and upset her all her life – and now this letter. She didn’t know what to think. She couldn’t think. What happened if somehow Paddy or the kids found out about this girl – found out that she had a daughter called Erin who wanted to meet her?
‘Kate? Kate, are you okay?’ Paddy was standing at the side of the bed.
‘I’ve a bit of a headache,’ she said stirring under the duvet. ‘I thought I’d try to sleep it off. What time is it?’
‘Seven p.m.’
‘Why didn’t someone wake me?’
‘You looked exhausted and you were having a great sleep. It will do you no harm.’
Kate sat herself up in the bed. She felt terrible, like she had been in a car accident. She felt physically and emotionally drained.
‘What about dinner? I’ll get up and get it.’
‘You will not!’ warned Paddy. ‘Kevin and Aisling are just cooking something downstairs. Leave them at it.’
Paddy went off downstairs and Kate lay back down, her eyes closed, disbelieving … What the hell was she going to do?
Chapter Thirteen
‘THIS IS ALL your fault, sally!’ screamed kate accusingly as she paced up and down on the tiled floor of the sun room of her sister’s house in Rathfarnham. ‘Why did you have to go and interfere and give them my address? Why couldn’t you say you had no idea where I live or what I’m doing?’
‘I’m your sister,’ Sally reminded her. ‘They obviously still have kept a record of all the details from when you were pregnant and in hospital. Remember you put me down as your next of kin? You gave them my address, my phone number and told them where I worked. The hospital and the adoption agency both knew you were staying with me.’
‘Shit, you’re right!’ admitted Kate, collapsing down on to the blue armchair.
‘The adoption agency phoned me at work,’ continued Sally. ‘What was I meant to do – change my job and give up working in St James’ Hospital because of you? I love my job and I’m good at it. Anyone phoning the hospital switch would be told the ward and floor I work on. I have nothing to hide,’ she said angrily, her blue eyes flashing. ‘You need to calm down about this, Kate. Marian Kelly, the social worker, told me that everything they do is in total confidence. She promised me that they will not give your address or phone number to anyone and I believe her. She posted on the letter to you. Your daughter Erin has no idea where you are. No one has.’
‘I’m sorry, Sally. I guess I’m paranoid about it,’ Kate apologized. She had been a nervous wreck for the past week, ever since she had got the letter. Sally and Mike had been away in France for a few days and she had totally panicked about what to do. She couldn’t tell anyone and she hadn’t wanted to ruin her sister’s holiday by phoning her.
‘You
are
being paranoid!’ said Sally, seriously. ‘Nothing bad is going to happen and if you keep acting as if your world is falling in, Paddy is bound to notice.’
‘I know, but I keep thinking about it. I can’t sleep. I wake up at two or
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