Three Button Trick and Other Stories

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Authors: Nicola Barker
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darling, is lying packed in the boot of my car.’
    â€˜I’ll tell you something else,’ Sydney said, lounging on Heinz’s sofa and drinking her fourth martini.
    â€˜What?’
    Heinz was sitting on his comfy chair sipping a cup of tea.
    â€˜I went and saw Jack the other day, right? A private tête à tête, and he came into the café where we’d arranged to meet with the buttons on his coat done up all …’ Sydney made a higgledy-piggledy movement with her hands, ‘like so …’
    â€˜He’s missing her?’ Heinz interjected, almost sympathetic.
    â€˜No. Not at all. That’s my point. It’s the three button trick.’
    â€œThe what?’
    â€˜Men do it. Some men. To make them look …’ she burped, ‘vul-ner-a-ble. And this is the best bit …’ She put her hand over her mouth. ‘Pardon me.’
    â€˜The best bit?’
    â€˜Yeah. Turns out, he only pulled that trick the very first time he ever spoke to Carrie. 1972. Outside the National Portrait Gallery. Took her in completely. Beguiled her, absolutely. And there he was, large as life, trying it on with me!’
    â€˜Did you tell her?’
    Sydney knocked back the rest of her drink. ‘Who?’
    â€˜Carrie.’
    â€˜Nope. Seemed a shame.’
    Heinz nodded.
    â€˜Nice flat,’ Sydney said, looking around her.
    â€˜It suits me well enough.’
    â€˜Come and sit over here.’ Sydney patted the sofa to her left. ‘Come on.’
    Heinz smiled. ‘I am perfectly comfortable where I am, thank you.’
    Sydney stared at him, balefully. ‘What’s wrong?’
    Outside the sound of a faint car horn was just audible.
    â€˜Nothing is wrong,’ Heinz said, pushing his great bulk up from his comfy chair and walking over to the window. While his back was turned, Sydney unbuttoned the grey silk shirt she was wearing and took it off. Heinz turned and said, ‘I think that’s your cab.’
    â€˜Huh?’
    â€˜Outside.’
    â€˜What cab?’
    â€˜I called for one a little while back.’
    â€˜A cab? Can’t I stay here?’
    â€˜What for?’
    Sydney started grinning but only half her mouth worked properly. ‘Sex, stupid.’
    Heinz picked up Sydney’s pale silk shirt from the arm of the sofa and handed it to her. ‘I’m eighty-three years old,’ he said gently, ‘and entirely impotent.’
    â€˜What’s wrong?’ Carrie asked, for the umpteenth time. ‘I can tell something’s bothering you. I only wish you’d tell me.’
    Sydney had still not yet quite recovered. It was Thursday night at the gym.
    â€˜Nothing’s wrong.’
    She hadn’t been sleeping. Her elbows were hurting. She couldn’t stop thinking …
    â€˜I only got out of the house tonight because Jack’s at a conference. I swore not to come here any more. He seems to have got the idea into his head that you’re some kind of …’ Carrie couldn’t think of the appropriate word.
    Sydney was staring at Carrie with an odd expression. Either Carrie lied, she was thinking, or Heinz lied.
    â€˜So Jack doesn’t know about Heinz yet?’
    â€˜No.’
    â€˜Well, let’s just hope he doesn’t get to find out, either.’
    Carrie shook her head. ‘I spoke to Heinz on the phone. I explained that I didn’t want Jack knowing. He was so good about it.’
    â€˜Knowing what?’
    â€˜Knowing anything.’
    Sydney smiled at this, and Carrie, for some reason, had cause, she sensed, to feel a sudden dart of disquiet. In her stomach. In her gut.
    â€˜I told you not to ring me!’ Carrie exclaimed, terrified at the possibility of discovery.
    â€˜Is it safe to talk?’
    â€˜Jack’s in the bath. He’s listening to the cricket on the radio.’
    â€˜You know I miss you terribly. You know that, don’t

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