Read Online The Weight of Destiny by Nyrae Dawn - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Nyrae Dawn
Tags: Contemporary, teen
Ads: Link
selling drugs or stealing everything.”
She shivers, making me wonder if she’s cold or if she’s responding to what I said. Damn…maybe I went too far. I shouldn’t have told her; but then, why does it matter? This is who I am. There’s no changing me, and beautiful or not, I don’t chill with people who give me hell for who I am.
“You brought beer into your house for your dad’s birthday? And wait, why wouldn’t your brother want to celebrate?”
I wait for the real question, because I know it’s coming. This time, she doesn’t surprise me.
“Did you? Steal? Or do you sell drugs?”
The fabric of her jacket doesn’t touch my arm anymore. I’m caught between wanting the warmth back and being pissed at her questions. Of course she would assume, just like Luke did. It’s the reaction I expect. She’s a rich girl, and I’m trash. It is what it is.
“It’s not the first time I’ve brought beer into my house, and it probably won’t be the last. My dad doesn’t live with us, and even if he did, he wouldn’t care. He’d drink with me. Luke thinks he’s too good for us, that’s why he didn’t want to celebrate.”
I wait for her to pull the blanket away, too. Wait for her to get up. Wait for her to look at me like she doesn’t know what she’s doing here with me, because I don’t know, either. Or why I’m here with her.
“I’m sorry… I didn’t know. I shouldn’t have asked like that.”
Breath leaves my lungs when her fluffy coat touches my arm again. What about the last question? I want to ask her. Doesn’t she want to know if she’s sitting here with a thief or a druggie? Now my anger is aimed her way for a different reason. She should want to know that. She shouldn’t just let that go. Not a girl like her.
“I don’t sell drugs. I didn’t steal the stuff. I sold my hoodie and some other things.”
The light from the lantern flickers in her wide, green eyes. I smell her sweet scent mixed with ocean.
“That’s why you don’t have a jacket on tonight?”
“It’s not a big deal. I’ll get another one.”
Now I’m waiting for something else—to see pity in her eyes. I hate that shit, and I might lose it if she feels bad for me. It doesn’t come, though. There’s something else in her eyes now—it almost looks like respect.
There have only been a few times in my life anyone looked at me like I’d done something important. When I’d jack something for Dad and his guys; when Shane and I beat a few guys’ asses for giving Drea shit.
And now.
What I don’t get is why selling my jacket would make her look at me like I’m something.
It’s on the tip of my tongue to ask her, but I’m not sure I want the answer. There’s shit I’ve done for Drea and Dad to be proud of me, but there’s nothing I could have done to deserve this girl seeing me that way.
“I always play by the rules. Always.” Her voice is soft. She’s staring downward at the blanket around us instead of at me. I want her eyes my way, but I’m scared if I push it, she’ll stop talking.
There’s never been anything in my life that’s scared me before.
“I need it,” she continues. “I know it sounds ridiculous, and to most people it probably is, but I need stability. I need my plans, and to be in control. Other people do crazy and reckless things. I don’t. I…”
When she doesn’t keep going, I scoot closer to her. It’s probably a stupid thing to do; this girl would be smart to get away from me. But she doesn’t move, so I put my arm around her. My fingers crave skin again, but all I get is the jacket.
The firecrackers start going off for the second time, then slowly—so slowly I’m not even sure she’s really doing it—Virginia lays her head on my shoulder.
I’ve held girls before—I’ve held Drea too many times to count—but it’s never made my body feel like it’s coming alive from the inside out.
“I had to deal with something I haven’t had to see in a long
She shivers, making me wonder if she’s cold or if she’s responding to what I said. Damn…maybe I went too far. I shouldn’t have told her; but then, why does it matter? This is who I am. There’s no changing me, and beautiful or not, I don’t chill with people who give me hell for who I am.
“You brought beer into your house for your dad’s birthday? And wait, why wouldn’t your brother want to celebrate?”
I wait for the real question, because I know it’s coming. This time, she doesn’t surprise me.
“Did you? Steal? Or do you sell drugs?”
The fabric of her jacket doesn’t touch my arm anymore. I’m caught between wanting the warmth back and being pissed at her questions. Of course she would assume, just like Luke did. It’s the reaction I expect. She’s a rich girl, and I’m trash. It is what it is.
“It’s not the first time I’ve brought beer into my house, and it probably won’t be the last. My dad doesn’t live with us, and even if he did, he wouldn’t care. He’d drink with me. Luke thinks he’s too good for us, that’s why he didn’t want to celebrate.”
I wait for her to pull the blanket away, too. Wait for her to get up. Wait for her to look at me like she doesn’t know what she’s doing here with me, because I don’t know, either. Or why I’m here with her.
“I’m sorry… I didn’t know. I shouldn’t have asked like that.”
Breath leaves my lungs when her fluffy coat touches my arm again. What about the last question? I want to ask her. Doesn’t she want to know if she’s sitting here with a thief or a druggie? Now my anger is aimed her way for a different reason. She should want to know that. She shouldn’t just let that go. Not a girl like her.
“I don’t sell drugs. I didn’t steal the stuff. I sold my hoodie and some other things.”
The light from the lantern flickers in her wide, green eyes. I smell her sweet scent mixed with ocean.
“That’s why you don’t have a jacket on tonight?”
“It’s not a big deal. I’ll get another one.”
Now I’m waiting for something else—to see pity in her eyes. I hate that shit, and I might lose it if she feels bad for me. It doesn’t come, though. There’s something else in her eyes now—it almost looks like respect.
There have only been a few times in my life anyone looked at me like I’d done something important. When I’d jack something for Dad and his guys; when Shane and I beat a few guys’ asses for giving Drea shit.
And now.
What I don’t get is why selling my jacket would make her look at me like I’m something.
It’s on the tip of my tongue to ask her, but I’m not sure I want the answer. There’s shit I’ve done for Drea and Dad to be proud of me, but there’s nothing I could have done to deserve this girl seeing me that way.
“I always play by the rules. Always.” Her voice is soft. She’s staring downward at the blanket around us instead of at me. I want her eyes my way, but I’m scared if I push it, she’ll stop talking.
There’s never been anything in my life that’s scared me before.
“I need it,” she continues. “I know it sounds ridiculous, and to most people it probably is, but I need stability. I need my plans, and to be in control. Other people do crazy and reckless things. I don’t. I…”
When she doesn’t keep going, I scoot closer to her. It’s probably a stupid thing to do; this girl would be smart to get away from me. But she doesn’t move, so I put my arm around her. My fingers crave skin again, but all I get is the jacket.
The firecrackers start going off for the second time, then slowly—so slowly I’m not even sure she’s really doing it—Virginia lays her head on my shoulder.
I’ve held girls before—I’ve held Drea too many times to count—but it’s never made my body feel like it’s coming alive from the inside out.
“I had to deal with something I haven’t had to see in a long
Similar Books
