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Authors: Sarina Bowen
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knew. It had been amazing, of course. I enjoyed every minute of it.
But what if the night had happened differently? If I’d gotten naked with Alison instead, and the condom broke? What then? A hasty trip to the health center, to get that pill you can take if you’re quick enough. The one that doesn’t always work.
Jesucristo .
There was a reason I hadn’t slept around like a lot of other guys. There were several reasons, but guilt was the main one. If my mother had any idea what I’d done tonight, she would lose her mind. Pregnant at nineteen, Ma’s life had never been the same.
After my father disappeared, Ma waited two years to find out what happened to him, saving up to hire a private investigator. The P.I. found my father within the month. He lives in Mexico City now, where he has another family.
We never even got a note.
“Not everyone is as selfish as your father,” Ma always said. “But I don’t want you putting yourself in the position of having to do the right thing. And you can’t put a teenage girl in the position of having to figure out what the right thing is. Don’t do it at all until you’re ready to become somebody’s father.”
My mother doesn’t mince words.
I never planned to take her advice literally. But her story weighed on me. It made me respectful of my high school girlfriends, who liked to make out but rarely let me touch them. And it made me feel guilty for wanting sex from Alison, who did not want to have sex. (With me.)
And now? It made me feel like a tool for sleeping with Bella.
Beside me, Bella breathed deeply, sleeping the sleep of the shameless. I envied her that. My churning thoughts kept me awake until, eventually, even those wore me out.
And I slept.
Six
Rafe
A t eight in the morning , I rolled over. Or rather, I tried to. My eyes snapped open at the shock of finding another body in the bed. I came to wakefulness against Bella, her bare ass snugged against my thighs. And since it was morning — and I was a guy — my morning wood was basically stabbing her in the back.
Holy …
Holding my breath, I eased away from her body. Bella sighed, but did not wake up. Inch by quiet inch, I extracted myself from the bed, carefully drawing the covers up over her as far as I dared. Her creamy breast lay there exposed, the nipple rosy in the morning light. I averted my eyes, feeling like a creeper for admiring her body.
I realized I was still holding my breath. Because it’s not every day you wake up naked with your neighbor after losing your virginity in a one-night stand. I exhaled as quietly as possible.
It was time to get the hell out of there.
I put my clothes on as fast as near silence would allow. Picking up my shoes and the stupid gift bag with Alison’s earrings inside, I tiptoed to the door, opening it like a thief in the night.
I didn’t breathe until the door was closed behind me. Setting my shoes down, I jammed my feet inside.
It was almost a clean getaway.
Abruptly, the neighboring door swung open to reveal a young woman in gym clothes. We were both caught off guard, startling each other right there on the tiny landing.
My surprise only grew when I realized who I was looking at. Lianne Chalice was only the most famous member of the freshman class — and an actual movie star. She’d played Princess Vindi in the film adaptations of all the Sorceress books. (My high school girlfriends had dragged me to every one of them. So I’d watched Lianne Chalice duel many a Hollywood actor.) I’d read in the New York Times that she was a freshman here this year, but I’d never run into her before. And certainly not in my own stairwell.
“You’re staring,” she hissed.
“Sorry,” I whispered automatically.
She gave me the most dismissive look I have ever seen on a girl in my life, and then stepped around me, heading down the stairs.
My heart thumping with embarrassment, I finished shoving my shoes onto my feet, and then quietly followed her down the
But what if the night had happened differently? If I’d gotten naked with Alison instead, and the condom broke? What then? A hasty trip to the health center, to get that pill you can take if you’re quick enough. The one that doesn’t always work.
Jesucristo .
There was a reason I hadn’t slept around like a lot of other guys. There were several reasons, but guilt was the main one. If my mother had any idea what I’d done tonight, she would lose her mind. Pregnant at nineteen, Ma’s life had never been the same.
After my father disappeared, Ma waited two years to find out what happened to him, saving up to hire a private investigator. The P.I. found my father within the month. He lives in Mexico City now, where he has another family.
We never even got a note.
“Not everyone is as selfish as your father,” Ma always said. “But I don’t want you putting yourself in the position of having to do the right thing. And you can’t put a teenage girl in the position of having to figure out what the right thing is. Don’t do it at all until you’re ready to become somebody’s father.”
My mother doesn’t mince words.
I never planned to take her advice literally. But her story weighed on me. It made me respectful of my high school girlfriends, who liked to make out but rarely let me touch them. And it made me feel guilty for wanting sex from Alison, who did not want to have sex. (With me.)
And now? It made me feel like a tool for sleeping with Bella.
Beside me, Bella breathed deeply, sleeping the sleep of the shameless. I envied her that. My churning thoughts kept me awake until, eventually, even those wore me out.
And I slept.
Six
Rafe
A t eight in the morning , I rolled over. Or rather, I tried to. My eyes snapped open at the shock of finding another body in the bed. I came to wakefulness against Bella, her bare ass snugged against my thighs. And since it was morning — and I was a guy — my morning wood was basically stabbing her in the back.
Holy …
Holding my breath, I eased away from her body. Bella sighed, but did not wake up. Inch by quiet inch, I extracted myself from the bed, carefully drawing the covers up over her as far as I dared. Her creamy breast lay there exposed, the nipple rosy in the morning light. I averted my eyes, feeling like a creeper for admiring her body.
I realized I was still holding my breath. Because it’s not every day you wake up naked with your neighbor after losing your virginity in a one-night stand. I exhaled as quietly as possible.
It was time to get the hell out of there.
I put my clothes on as fast as near silence would allow. Picking up my shoes and the stupid gift bag with Alison’s earrings inside, I tiptoed to the door, opening it like a thief in the night.
I didn’t breathe until the door was closed behind me. Setting my shoes down, I jammed my feet inside.
It was almost a clean getaway.
Abruptly, the neighboring door swung open to reveal a young woman in gym clothes. We were both caught off guard, startling each other right there on the tiny landing.
My surprise only grew when I realized who I was looking at. Lianne Chalice was only the most famous member of the freshman class — and an actual movie star. She’d played Princess Vindi in the film adaptations of all the Sorceress books. (My high school girlfriends had dragged me to every one of them. So I’d watched Lianne Chalice duel many a Hollywood actor.) I’d read in the New York Times that she was a freshman here this year, but I’d never run into her before. And certainly not in my own stairwell.
“You’re staring,” she hissed.
“Sorry,” I whispered automatically.
She gave me the most dismissive look I have ever seen on a girl in my life, and then stepped around me, heading down the stairs.
My heart thumping with embarrassment, I finished shoving my shoes onto my feet, and then quietly followed her down the
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