Thus, crashing to the floor with a very audible thud. I heard a familiar laugh from right in front of me. I opened my eyes, which had been squinted in pain, to find Tatum, looking half asleep and quite hung-over, but still beautiful, on the ground next to the couch I had been lying on. Her face was only inches from mine causing her laugh to shriek in my ears like glass shattering into my brain.
“Bad pair of skates?” It was Tatum's favorite phrase when someone ate shit. Seeing as though I’m about as graceful as a baby calf, she was able to use it on me almost daily.
“Fuckin' hilarious, Tatum. Where the hell are we?” I was so irritated by that point I could've punched her.
“I have no clue, dude. We’re upstairs. That, I can tell you for sure,” she said dispassionately.
“How do you have any idea we're upstairs? There isn't even a window in here.” I looked then at my surroundings.
The room we were in had no windows and two doors. I was guessing one door went to a bathroom or closet and the other, I assumed, was an exit of some sort.
“Judging by the sound of your ass hitting the ground we have to be upstairs.” She said this completely dry, not even a smirk on her face.
I looked at her, expressionless, for a few moments before I broke. I tried a laugh but that hurt, so I had to settle for a light chuckle. At that, the dry look she was giving me broke too. We have never gone longer than a minute with the stare-off; someone always breaks.
“Okay, so we're upstairs. What the fuck does that tell us?” I said obviously irritated.
“Do you remember anything?”
I thought about it for a minute and tried to remember. I tried to piece together the remnants and fragments of the previous night. I remembered Philippe the vampire tool, and Cyrus, and the bouncer in the tiny shirt. I vaguely recalled pulsing music, candle light, and some slut in a blue dress.
Fuck. I don't know.
I couldn't distinguish fact from fiction. It all seemed like a dream. The only thing I could say for certain is that, whatever happened, I was too fucked up to remember it properly.
My head spun at light speed toward Tatum who, coincidentally, was turning to look at me. My wide eyes met hers as I expressed my discovery.
“That fuckin' drink!” I shouted. “What the fuck was that shit??” I asked Tatum, hoping she might remember what she had ordered.
“I have no clue. I can't even remember what it tasted like. You don't know what you ordered?” She said with little thought.
Huh?
“I didn't order anything. You handed me a drink. I thought you ordered it...you didn't?”
“No. I was handed a drink. I drank it. You know I don't question free drinks. If I didn’t buy our drinks, then who did?” She asked.
“CYRUS!” I screamed this angrily. I hollered loud and angrily enough in fact to rouse the man in question. Two seconds later he came through the door.
“Well speak of the devil and he appears.” Tatum can be such a snide bitch. I love it.
“I've always wanted a girl to scream my name.” He smiled that perfect, model smile that makes girls swoon.
What a dick!
Tatum had had her fill of Mr. Cyrus Atossa. She jumped up in one fluid movement and was in his face before I could take a breath.
“What the fuck’s going on?” She spoke through her teeth, so close to his nose she could have bitten it off. Cyrus looked at her like a scared child. I think he even flinched.
That's my girl, instilling fear in the hearts of men since
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