Read Online The Scarlet Ruse by John D. MacDonald - Free Book Online Page A
Authors: John D. MacDonald
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twenty, doesn't it?"
She used scratch paper and said, "Six forty-four eighty with tax, Mr. Sulzer."
He produced six hundreds and one fifty. She made out a receipt and gave him his change. He said, "When are you going to change your mind about some nice Sunday?"
"If I do, I'll let you know, okay?"
"How is he doing locating a 1930?"
"Gee, I don't know. He was complaining about finding one that wasn't the quality you want. I really don't know much about coins, like I keep telling you. If he finds one, I'm sure he'll phone."
Sulzer left. She made a face at me. "He collects double eagles. St. Gaudens, not the Liberty Heads."
"What's a slider?"
"He won't buy anything except B.U. or better. That means Brilliant Uncirculated. The only things better are choice, gem, and proof. This one here, he thinks it could just as well have been called A.U., or Almost Uncirculated. So if a coin is sort of in the middle, where you could maybe honestly call it one or the other, it's what a dealer calls a slider. I don't feel a thing for coins. I mean they're valuable, and they keep going up and all, but I don't want to own them. Let me get these back in the safe with the money."
When she came back I said, "What about some nice Sunday?"
"Oh, he's got a sailboat. And a lot of ideas."
"And you've already got somebody you'd rather go sailing with?"
"Yes, but not the way you mean that. You didn't tell me what kind of investigator you are, Mr. McGee."
"Travis or Trav, Mary Alice. I'm not any kind. I just try to find things people lose. On a percentage basis. Salvage consultant."
"I hope you find the stamps."
"You'll probably be able to tell me where they are."
She bit her lip and tilted her head. "Now that's kind of a rotten thing to say."
"How so?"
"I wouldn't do anything like that!"
"Like what?"
"Steal anything."
"You, dear? I mean you are a bright woman, and you probably saw something or heard something or know something which doesn't seem important at all, but is really very important. When you and I find out what it is you know, then it will tell us where the stamps are."
She frowned at me. "I don't like cute."
"What?"
"You said that the way you said it so I would take it wrong. You wanted me to. You wanted to see me react. Okay, I'm reacting. I don't like that kind of cute. Don't play little games with me. If I'm waiting for you to play games all the time, I won't be thinking of how to help, will I?"
"Good point."
"You did it on purpose?"
"Certainly. Can I take you to lunch?"
"She'll be back in ten minutes. Sure."
"Seems quiet around here. Don't you get bored?"
"Bored! I'm about ten thousand jobs behind right now. I've got a whole mess of new issues to mount. Our mailing is going to be late this month. It goes to six hundred people. I've got three appraisals I'm working on, for estates. I took two of them home to my place, because they aren't all that important moneywise. But the other is back in the safe, and it's pretty nice. It's nicer than Hirsh said it was going to be."
"And if you wanted to, you could pull a nice item out of it and replace it with something cheaper, and nobody would know?"
She turned away from me and began straightening albums on one of the shelves behind her.
"What's the matter?" I asked.
"I'm waiting until I can say something."
I waited. She turned back. "Here is the only way I can say it. Excuse my French, I don't give a goddamn what you would do or wouldn't do. Or what anybody else in the world does or doesn't do. If I steal, somebody knows. Me! That's why I can't, won't and don't. And I am going to have lunch alone, thanks."
"I guess you should. I guess nobody is really worthy of breaking bread with you, dear. We ordinary mortals are unable to tell at first sight just how totally honest and decent and virtuous you really are. At first glance, you look like a sizable and pretty lady, and I have the vague feeling that many pretty ladies have done unpretty things over the last few thousand
She used scratch paper and said, "Six forty-four eighty with tax, Mr. Sulzer."
He produced six hundreds and one fifty. She made out a receipt and gave him his change. He said, "When are you going to change your mind about some nice Sunday?"
"If I do, I'll let you know, okay?"
"How is he doing locating a 1930?"
"Gee, I don't know. He was complaining about finding one that wasn't the quality you want. I really don't know much about coins, like I keep telling you. If he finds one, I'm sure he'll phone."
Sulzer left. She made a face at me. "He collects double eagles. St. Gaudens, not the Liberty Heads."
"What's a slider?"
"He won't buy anything except B.U. or better. That means Brilliant Uncirculated. The only things better are choice, gem, and proof. This one here, he thinks it could just as well have been called A.U., or Almost Uncirculated. So if a coin is sort of in the middle, where you could maybe honestly call it one or the other, it's what a dealer calls a slider. I don't feel a thing for coins. I mean they're valuable, and they keep going up and all, but I don't want to own them. Let me get these back in the safe with the money."
When she came back I said, "What about some nice Sunday?"
"Oh, he's got a sailboat. And a lot of ideas."
"And you've already got somebody you'd rather go sailing with?"
"Yes, but not the way you mean that. You didn't tell me what kind of investigator you are, Mr. McGee."
"Travis or Trav, Mary Alice. I'm not any kind. I just try to find things people lose. On a percentage basis. Salvage consultant."
"I hope you find the stamps."
"You'll probably be able to tell me where they are."
She bit her lip and tilted her head. "Now that's kind of a rotten thing to say."
"How so?"
"I wouldn't do anything like that!"
"Like what?"
"Steal anything."
"You, dear? I mean you are a bright woman, and you probably saw something or heard something or know something which doesn't seem important at all, but is really very important. When you and I find out what it is you know, then it will tell us where the stamps are."
She frowned at me. "I don't like cute."
"What?"
"You said that the way you said it so I would take it wrong. You wanted me to. You wanted to see me react. Okay, I'm reacting. I don't like that kind of cute. Don't play little games with me. If I'm waiting for you to play games all the time, I won't be thinking of how to help, will I?"
"Good point."
"You did it on purpose?"
"Certainly. Can I take you to lunch?"
"She'll be back in ten minutes. Sure."
"Seems quiet around here. Don't you get bored?"
"Bored! I'm about ten thousand jobs behind right now. I've got a whole mess of new issues to mount. Our mailing is going to be late this month. It goes to six hundred people. I've got three appraisals I'm working on, for estates. I took two of them home to my place, because they aren't all that important moneywise. But the other is back in the safe, and it's pretty nice. It's nicer than Hirsh said it was going to be."
"And if you wanted to, you could pull a nice item out of it and replace it with something cheaper, and nobody would know?"
She turned away from me and began straightening albums on one of the shelves behind her.
"What's the matter?" I asked.
"I'm waiting until I can say something."
I waited. She turned back. "Here is the only way I can say it. Excuse my French, I don't give a goddamn what you would do or wouldn't do. Or what anybody else in the world does or doesn't do. If I steal, somebody knows. Me! That's why I can't, won't and don't. And I am going to have lunch alone, thanks."
"I guess you should. I guess nobody is really worthy of breaking bread with you, dear. We ordinary mortals are unable to tell at first sight just how totally honest and decent and virtuous you really are. At first glance, you look like a sizable and pretty lady, and I have the vague feeling that many pretty ladies have done unpretty things over the last few thousand