feeling a little off after last night’s exchange. I’d love to be able to be lazy and head to the beach a little later, but the weather seems to be conspiring against me.
I put my iPhone music on shuffle as I get ready to go and Adele’s “Skyfall” starts playing. It’s a beautiful song, but the tone is so solemn, I’m finding it hard to get motivated.
Trudging to the bathroom, I try to wash away my somber state. I turn on the faucet and splash some cold water onto my face. Scrutinizing myself in the mirror, I attempt to see what Emmy sees. Could this face be enough to capture the interest of someone like Evan? When I examine individual features, it’s hard to find fault. My teeth are white and straight thanks to years of braces and orthodontic work. My eyes are bright and alert, a shade of green that dramatically contrasts with my brown hair. There are no blemishes on my skin, but a few freckles dot my shoulders. My eyebrows are appropriately manicured and my ears are not too large. Collectively, I suppose one might consider me attractive, but it’s hard to see in yourself what others claim to see.
Maddy and I head to the beach and I park in my usual spot. There are a few cars here today, but a lot less than previously, surely due to the dreary weather. I don’t bother trying to guess which car, if any, belongs to Evan. I imagine his car is safely tucked away in his attached garage.
Maddy and I walk down to the beach and warm up. I sit on the ground and start to stretch my ankles with an alphabet stretch. It’s a warm-up exercise I learned in soccer. Normally, you’re supposed to point your toes into the air and spell out the alphabet one letter at a time and in the process, help relieve the residual ankle pain from my recent sprain. My mood dictates my decisions, and I start spelling E-V-A-N, then M-A-Y-B-E, and finally H-O-P-E.
Before starting my run, I check the horizon, and there are no other joggers in sight. Now that I know exactly where Evan’s house is, I purposely jog in that direction hoping to give fate another chance to intervene. In no time at all, I’m running right past his home, but there’s no sign of life. The doors and windows are all closed and I can’t tell if there are any lights on inside. I don’t let my eyes linger too long. I have to keep an eye on the terrain this time.
The prudent thing to do would be to make today’s run a short one. There’s no sense in pushing myself and chancing another injury. The next one might not heal as quickly. After only fifteen minutes, I decide it’s time for a break. Maddy and I play a little fetch. I stretch my muscles and joints, and again scan my surroundings. No signs of life other than a few men with fishing rods and some scavenging dirty seabirds.
Disappointment settles in, and I resume my jog, heading back towards the car. Every few minutes, I peer towards Evan’s house and the closer I get the more certain I am that someone is out on the deck. At first, I can barely make out the figure, but little by little, I begin to recognize the familiar physique of Evan. He even seems to be scanning the beach looking for something, or someone.
My mind is reeling. Thoughts start filling my head. What should I say if he approaches me? Suppose he invites me back in? What if he asks for my number? What if he asks me on a date? Then, it occurs to me ... what if he doesn’t?
I’m nearly to his beach house and I’m watching with one eye on the surf and one eye on Evan. I can see him watching me. He’s wearing a hoodie so I can’t see his beautiful face, but the shorts that hang low on his waist reveal the fit muscular body that I recall vividly. I raise my hand to wave to him, but before I can get my arm above my head, Evan turns away, goes inside and closes the door. My heart sinks into the pit of my stomach. What the hell just happened?
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