Read Online THE RELUCTANT BRIDE by Joy Wodhams - Free Book Online Page B

must know I care about you. And I respect you
tremendously.”
    “ Respect!
If I'd shown a little less respect for you ,
maybe this wouldn't have happened.”
    “ Bernard,”
she said miserably. “You really don't understand.”
    “ I
wanted us to have a solid start. I had it all worked out. As soon as
I'd taken my finals – As soon as I'd saved enough -”
    “ This
isn't about money, Bernard.” But it was.
    “ I
wanted things to be right for us. For you. But I was wrong, wasn't I?
I should have just grabbed you. Like he did.”
    “ It's
not like that -”
    “ I
suppose you've already slept with him.”
    “ No!”
    “ What's
he like, Gabriella?How does he hold you? How does he kiss you? Like
this?” And Bernard's arms were round her, pulling her to him.
She felt the edge of the parapet cut into her back as he pressed
against her. His lips sought hers, ground brutally, and she tasted
salt blood as she struggled to free herself.
    “ Bernard!”
She wrenched her mouth away. “Please, you're hurting me
    Abruptly
he let her go, stood back. She clung to the parapet, more shaken than
she could have imagined. A shaft of moonlight pierced the clouds, lit
his face, and she saw how desolate he looked.
    Poor
Bernard. So calm and sensible, so apparently lacking in ardour. And
yet, what passion hidden beneath that stolid exterior. Their cosy
undemanding relationship had been merely a figment of her
imagination. Shame that she could have so misjudged the depth of his
feelings moved her to embrace him, to tell him that it was all right,
she didn't mean it, she would marry him.
    But
she couldn't do that. Even if she were not committed to marrying Rod,
she knew that marriage to Bernard now was out of the question.
    “ I'm
so sorry,” she whispered. “I never realised you cared so
much.”
    “ Really?
After two years?” He lifted a hand, dropped it. Shook his head.
“I can't believe you could do this, Gabriella.”
    She
turned away, gazed over the quiet river. Sounds of music drifted from
the town and a car hooted somewhere, but around them nothing stirred.
“You're better off without me, Bernard. You'll find someone
else, I know you will.”
    “ Yes.”
    She
shivered and pulled her coat tight across her chest, knowing that
nothing she said now could make it less painful for him. “Perhaps
I'd better go,” she said.
    “ Yes.”
    “ I'll
get a taxi home. Goodnight, Bernard.”
    “ Goodnight.”
    She
turned and left him standing on the bridge.
    At
home her mother was still awake and more animated than usual.
    “ Your
young man phoned!”
    “ Bernard?
I've just left -”
    “ No,
dear. Rod. Your fiance! We had a lovely long chat.”
    “ Did
he say what he wanted?”
    “ Do
you know, I don't believe he did. It was just after you left, but he
did say he'd talk to you in the morning. Such a coincidence, dear,
he's a garden lover too. He even offered to take me to the Garden
Festival this summer!”
    “ That
was nice of him,” said Gabriella. She would make sure that he
kept his promise.
    It
was another twenty minutes before she could retreat to her own
bedroom and relax the tight rein she had kept on her emotions. She
found herself already crying as she shut the bedroom door behind her
and couldn't stop the tears. They poured down her cheeks as she
brushed her hair, trickled into her mouth as she cleaned her teeth,
and she didn't know whom she cried for more, Bernard or herself. Her
movements rough with self disgust, she scrubbed her face and dragged
off her clothes, throwing them into a corner.
    She
had been so self absorbed, so bent on ensuring that no man could
pierce her defences, that she had allowed Bernard to fall in love
with her, completely failing to recognise that it had been his own
personal code of conduct, not a lack of desire, that had ruled his
actions. And now she had hurt him.
    If
she could be so wrong about Bernard, how could she be sure about
anything? Or anyone? Perhaps even Rod had purer motives