The President's Vampire

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Authors: Christopher Farnsworth
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jacket, and got as far as the door of a strip club before he turned back around and went home again.
    He was going to get a life. He wasn’t going to end up like Griff. He wouldn’t pay for someone to rub up against him, and he was damn sure not going to die alone.

    CADE PUT ONE CHANGE of clothes into a bag. That was as close as he got to a normal human’s preparations for a trip.
    Then he went to the small fridge and removed a waxed-paper carton, about the size of a half-gallon container of milk.
    It was filled with animal blood—a mixture of cow and pig.
    He looked at the carton for a long moment. Then he put the container in the microwave on the counter and waited for the beep.
    Cade didn’t like feeding. Or rather, he liked it too much. And he didn’t like being reminded of what he was.
    But it was necessary. He had work to do. He needed his strength. He had every reason to feed.
    He told himself that as he opened the carton, forcing his movements to be steady and deliberate and slow.
    The steaming blood flooded into his system, flushing his pale skin briefly before settling into deep, capillary-rich beds of tissue inside his body.
    Two long gulps, and it was all gone. Cade shuddered and grit his teeth to keep from breaking out in a smile.
    He loved it. Even this pale, weak imitation of human blood. He loved every drop.
    Cade shook himself and threw the empty carton across the room. Someone might have even said he looked disgusted.
    “Did you enjoy watching that?” Cade asked, apparently to the empty room.
    A figure emerged from the gloom at the back of the Reliquary. She appeared to be a young woman, barely out of her teens. Strawberry-blond hair and an irrepressible smile.
    It just happened that her cute little grin had fangs.
    “I always like watching you, Cade.”
    Tania. Cade’s sometime ally, sometime lover, and constant reminder. He’d once promised to save her. He’d failed.
    Since then, she had become strangely proprietary of him. She followed him, appearing in his life from time to time, even helping him on his missions. But she had no love of humanity. Unlike Cade, she embraced what she was.
    She had been showing up more often in the past year. He always knew when she’d gotten into the Reliquary. Despite what Zach had said, Cade had not invited her in. In fact, he’d changed the codes on the locks. She always got past them.
    She looked at the bag. “Oooh. A vacation. I could use some time away.”
    “You’re not coming.”
    “I’m sure I could if we worked at it.”
    Cade tensed and spun on her. “I am not joking.”
    She stuck her tongue out at him. “You’re no fun tonight.”
    “I can smell the kill on you, Tania.”
    “I never promised to be a martyr like you, Nathaniel. I get hungry.”
    Tania had never fed on an innocent in Cade’s presence. But to come here, stinking of fresh blood, that was a deliberate provocation.
    “Do you think I’ll simply let you go on like this forever?”
    That banished the mischief from her eyes. “Sweets,” she said, “what makes you think you let me do anything?”
    It had never come down to an actual physical confrontation between them. Maybe she was only biding her time until she could be sure who would win.
    They stared at each other for a long moment. Then Tania smiled again.
    “If you’re going to be such a stiff, I might as well look elsewhere for my entertainment tonight.”
    She paused, waiting for his reply.
    “Lock the door on your way out,” Cade said.
    She frowned at him, and then was gone.
    Tania was right. He was troubled, although no one else could have ever noticed it. He knew this shouldn’t be happening.
    He looked at the sharp, jagged teeth on what looked like a man-sized piranha’s head, floating in a jar of formaldehyde. It was remarkably similar to the skull emerging as the beetles chomped noisily on the severed head.
    The plaque read SKELETAL REMAINS FROM INNSMOUTH, MASS., 1928.
    Innsmouth.
    As foolish as it was,

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