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Authors: Paul Sean Grieve
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have the opportunity to learn from each other and
to grow. I’ve asked Greg to share some of his experiences in the
hope that hearing what he has to say might help you understand your
individual situations better.”
Hikari’s sense of dread intensified. Having
spent most of the last four months doing her level best not to
think about what had happened to her, the fact that she’d have to
dredge it all up in front of a group of strangers was almost more
than she could bear. But she was determined to see it
through.
Mme Kudo turned to Greg and asked him in
English if he was ready to begin.
“ Before I start,” said Greg, “I’d
like to get a sense of how many people here speak English. Could I
get a show of hands?”
His words were met with a room full of blank
stares until Mme Kudo translated, at which point all the shaking
heads indicated that he was going to have to rely on her services
as interpreter.
“ Alright then,” he said. “Mme Kudo
told me you knew I’d be coming, but that you didn’t know what I’d
be talking about. Is that correct?”
“ I told them only that we would
have a very special visitor,” answered Mme Kudo after translating
his words.
“ In that case, I’d better give a
bit of background,” he said as Mme Kudo simultaneously translated.
“You can ask me all the questions you want later, but the short
version is that I’m a retired pick-up artist.”
Hikari joined the chorus of surprised
introjections as eyes widened around the room.
“ I was never a professional, like
some men claim to be, but I was prolific enough to be able to say
that I’ve had a lot of experience with women. I’ve also helped a
lot of men who’ve had problems in their relationships with women
understand themselves and their situations better.”
“ Western men or Japanese men?”
asked Keiko in Japanese.
“ Western men, always,” answered
Greg without waiting for the translation. “But a the fact that I’ve
lived the latter part of my life in Japan means I’ve had experience
with Japanese women and with western men who’ve had relationships
with Japanese women. While Japan is special in a number of ways,
I’ve found that relationships between men and women are very
similar to those of their western counterparts in many
ways.”
“ Perhaps you could explain how you
feel you can help the women here today,” suggested Mme
Kudo.
“ I’m sorry to be so blunt,” he
replied, “but if the unmarried women leave here today with dashed
hopes and shattered expectations, I’ve done my job.”
“ I’m not sure how to translate
that,” chuffed Mme Kudo.
“ Let’s just say my central message
is that what we’ve been been taught to expect in our love lives is
the stuff of fantasy and the longer we cling to that fantasy, the
less likely we are to find and maintain satisfying
relationships.”
Mme Kudo translated and the women looked down
grimly as Hikari thought deeply about Greg’s words. She knew all
too well about dashed expectations and wondered what this older man
might have to say. But for that, she’d have to wait.
“ Now that Greg-san has had a
chance to introduce himself,” said Mme Kudo, “I’d like you all to
share your stories one by one and listen carefully to his
comments.”
The women looked around nervously. Mme Kudo
had asked them all in advance to prepare a brief presentation about
their individual situations and all of them had, but Japan’s
“tatamae” culture was not amenable to the expression of strong
emotions and the prospect of having to spill their guts in front of
a room full of strangers was daunting to say the least. When Mme
Kudo asked for volunteers, to no one’s surprise, not a single hand
went up.
“ Aki, why don’t you
begin?”
Aki pointed to her nose the way Japanese do
when they aren’t sure if they’re the one’s being spoken to. Mme
Kudo nodded encouragingly and Aki looked self-consciously down at
the table. After rounds of
to grow. I’ve asked Greg to share some of his experiences in the
hope that hearing what he has to say might help you understand your
individual situations better.”
Hikari’s sense of dread intensified. Having
spent most of the last four months doing her level best not to
think about what had happened to her, the fact that she’d have to
dredge it all up in front of a group of strangers was almost more
than she could bear. But she was determined to see it
through.
Mme Kudo turned to Greg and asked him in
English if he was ready to begin.
“ Before I start,” said Greg, “I’d
like to get a sense of how many people here speak English. Could I
get a show of hands?”
His words were met with a room full of blank
stares until Mme Kudo translated, at which point all the shaking
heads indicated that he was going to have to rely on her services
as interpreter.
“ Alright then,” he said. “Mme Kudo
told me you knew I’d be coming, but that you didn’t know what I’d
be talking about. Is that correct?”
“ I told them only that we would
have a very special visitor,” answered Mme Kudo after translating
his words.
“ In that case, I’d better give a
bit of background,” he said as Mme Kudo simultaneously translated.
“You can ask me all the questions you want later, but the short
version is that I’m a retired pick-up artist.”
Hikari joined the chorus of surprised
introjections as eyes widened around the room.
“ I was never a professional, like
some men claim to be, but I was prolific enough to be able to say
that I’ve had a lot of experience with women. I’ve also helped a
lot of men who’ve had problems in their relationships with women
understand themselves and their situations better.”
“ Western men or Japanese men?”
asked Keiko in Japanese.
“ Western men, always,” answered
Greg without waiting for the translation. “But a the fact that I’ve
lived the latter part of my life in Japan means I’ve had experience
with Japanese women and with western men who’ve had relationships
with Japanese women. While Japan is special in a number of ways,
I’ve found that relationships between men and women are very
similar to those of their western counterparts in many
ways.”
“ Perhaps you could explain how you
feel you can help the women here today,” suggested Mme
Kudo.
“ I’m sorry to be so blunt,” he
replied, “but if the unmarried women leave here today with dashed
hopes and shattered expectations, I’ve done my job.”
“ I’m not sure how to translate
that,” chuffed Mme Kudo.
“ Let’s just say my central message
is that what we’ve been been taught to expect in our love lives is
the stuff of fantasy and the longer we cling to that fantasy, the
less likely we are to find and maintain satisfying
relationships.”
Mme Kudo translated and the women looked down
grimly as Hikari thought deeply about Greg’s words. She knew all
too well about dashed expectations and wondered what this older man
might have to say. But for that, she’d have to wait.
“ Now that Greg-san has had a
chance to introduce himself,” said Mme Kudo, “I’d like you all to
share your stories one by one and listen carefully to his
comments.”
The women looked around nervously. Mme Kudo
had asked them all in advance to prepare a brief presentation about
their individual situations and all of them had, but Japan’s
“tatamae” culture was not amenable to the expression of strong
emotions and the prospect of having to spill their guts in front of
a room full of strangers was daunting to say the least. When Mme
Kudo asked for volunteers, to no one’s surprise, not a single hand
went up.
“ Aki, why don’t you
begin?”
Aki pointed to her nose the way Japanese do
when they aren’t sure if they’re the one’s being spoken to. Mme
Kudo nodded encouragingly and Aki looked self-consciously down at
the table. After rounds of
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