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Authors: Wendy Vella
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control him? Had Joseph only wanted to help guide him on the right path? If Will had truly taken the time to look, would he have found the big brother he’d always wanted?
“When I realized you were not coming back, I sent a man to London to find you. When he returned saying that he had found evidence that you and Luke had boarded a boat bound for India, I knew I could do nothing to bring you home.”
Will remembered Thea’s words. He was so worried when you left, he paced these halls for days, muttering about going after you and then one day he just stopped and never mentioned your name again .
Climbing to his feet, Will began to pace. “I truly didn’t believe you cared at the time. I was so consumed with anger and frustration over what I believed to be the wrongs inflicted upon me that I did not take the time to see how my departure would impact those I left behind. It wasn’t until I was away from here that the guilt grew. I wanted to send you a letter many times, but I never knew the right words to say.”
“‘Joe, I’m well, please don’t worry. I will return one day’.”
Will snorted at his brother’s drawled words.
“For the first few months after leaving here I felt free, and the pressure inside me eased, but it did not take long to realize what I had left behind and to understand how atrociously spoiled I had become.”
“Why didn’t you return sooner, Will?”
Will rested his forehead on the cool glass of the window. Did he even know why he had stayed away so long?
“I never fitted here, you know. Not really, Joe. Our father was the Duke and you were in training to be his heir, but what was I?”
“A son and a brother who was loved very much.”
“Perhaps.” Will looked out the window. “But I wanted more and never had the strength of character then to go searching for it, so I settled on being rebellious.”
“You were certainly that,” Joseph said.
“The more trouble I created, the angrier you got and a part of me relished in your rage. I wanted your perfect life to have a chink in it, and that chink was me.” Will felt the shame that always came when he remembered his behavior. But he needed to say these things; they were five years overdue. And he would not leave this room until he had at least cleared the air with his brother.
“But why wait so long to return?”
“I wanted to make something of myself, be someone who the both of us could be proud of, Joe. It just took me so long to find that person and even longer to find my way back home. I’m sorry that in doing so I hurt so many people.”
Will heard the clink of a glass.
“Penny says the problem is that we never really formed a bond, Will. Before Father died, I was always taking lessons or behaving like Father expected me to and after he died I became your parent and was no longer your brother. I’m sorry for that.”
“Everything you said to me the day I left was true, Joe.” Will sighed. “And I should have supported you after our father died, not made your life difficult.”
“And maybe if I had asked you for that support instead of trying to do it all myself, then things would have been different.”
Will was silent for a while as he thought about what he wanted to say next.
“I came to understand a bit about the pressure you were under and probably still are, when I was away.”
“Tell me about yourself, brother, so I may now know the man you have become?” Joseph asked.
Will couldn’t seem to stand still so he walked around the office touching things. He had never been good at baring his soul, and doing so while facing his brother, the one man he had never really spoken to, was not easy for him.
“Come, Will, talk to me,” Joseph coaxed. “I don’t believe we have ever really conversed on any level.”
“When I had packed my things, I left the house and stormed to the stables. Luke was inside and asked where I was bound. I told him, and he asked to accompany me,” Will
“When I realized you were not coming back, I sent a man to London to find you. When he returned saying that he had found evidence that you and Luke had boarded a boat bound for India, I knew I could do nothing to bring you home.”
Will remembered Thea’s words. He was so worried when you left, he paced these halls for days, muttering about going after you and then one day he just stopped and never mentioned your name again .
Climbing to his feet, Will began to pace. “I truly didn’t believe you cared at the time. I was so consumed with anger and frustration over what I believed to be the wrongs inflicted upon me that I did not take the time to see how my departure would impact those I left behind. It wasn’t until I was away from here that the guilt grew. I wanted to send you a letter many times, but I never knew the right words to say.”
“‘Joe, I’m well, please don’t worry. I will return one day’.”
Will snorted at his brother’s drawled words.
“For the first few months after leaving here I felt free, and the pressure inside me eased, but it did not take long to realize what I had left behind and to understand how atrociously spoiled I had become.”
“Why didn’t you return sooner, Will?”
Will rested his forehead on the cool glass of the window. Did he even know why he had stayed away so long?
“I never fitted here, you know. Not really, Joe. Our father was the Duke and you were in training to be his heir, but what was I?”
“A son and a brother who was loved very much.”
“Perhaps.” Will looked out the window. “But I wanted more and never had the strength of character then to go searching for it, so I settled on being rebellious.”
“You were certainly that,” Joseph said.
“The more trouble I created, the angrier you got and a part of me relished in your rage. I wanted your perfect life to have a chink in it, and that chink was me.” Will felt the shame that always came when he remembered his behavior. But he needed to say these things; they were five years overdue. And he would not leave this room until he had at least cleared the air with his brother.
“But why wait so long to return?”
“I wanted to make something of myself, be someone who the both of us could be proud of, Joe. It just took me so long to find that person and even longer to find my way back home. I’m sorry that in doing so I hurt so many people.”
Will heard the clink of a glass.
“Penny says the problem is that we never really formed a bond, Will. Before Father died, I was always taking lessons or behaving like Father expected me to and after he died I became your parent and was no longer your brother. I’m sorry for that.”
“Everything you said to me the day I left was true, Joe.” Will sighed. “And I should have supported you after our father died, not made your life difficult.”
“And maybe if I had asked you for that support instead of trying to do it all myself, then things would have been different.”
Will was silent for a while as he thought about what he wanted to say next.
“I came to understand a bit about the pressure you were under and probably still are, when I was away.”
“Tell me about yourself, brother, so I may now know the man you have become?” Joseph asked.
Will couldn’t seem to stand still so he walked around the office touching things. He had never been good at baring his soul, and doing so while facing his brother, the one man he had never really spoken to, was not easy for him.
“Come, Will, talk to me,” Joseph coaxed. “I don’t believe we have ever really conversed on any level.”
“When I had packed my things, I left the house and stormed to the stables. Luke was inside and asked where I was bound. I told him, and he asked to accompany me,” Will
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