âI donât know,â I said, but I understood what Blake was really asking.
What happened to you last night? What did you do? What are you hiding?
âI need to see my family,â I said to change the subject. âAlone.â
Blake nodded, doing his best to hide his disappointment that I wasnât ready to confide in him. âIâll wait in the hall.â
I started to turn away, but Blake caught my hand and pulled me back, holding on tight when I tried to pull away. I gritted my teeth behind closed lips so he wouldnât know the torture it was to be so close to him, so close to what was inside of him.
Life. So much irresistible life.
âYou can trust me,â he said, holding my gaze. âNo matter what you tell me, it stays between us, okay?â
âOkay. I know.â I slid my hand from his and breathed again. But even when Iâd left him behind, I could still feel the pulsing seduction of life inside him, and I wanted it. Needed it. In an instant I went from shivering to sweating. My muscles cramped and my stomach roiled with nausea. It was all I could do to keep from doubling over and retching.
I paused at the door to take a few deep breaths, which helped a little. Then I stepped inside.
There were two beds in the suite. The curtains that would normally partition the patients had been pushed back, so the room with its peach-colored wallpaper and benign country art on the walls was wide open.
I looked from my mom to Erin. For several seconds all I could do was stare. Whatever had caused their spasmodic movements had calmed. Both of them shone with health and vitality, their skin porcelain smooth and radiant, which seemed doubly impossible because no one looked that good under fluorescent hospital lighting. My momâs and Erinâs hair fell in melted-ice-cream waves over their shoulders. Erinâs dishwater-blond hair had always been thin and brittle, but now it was the color of butter, and was so thick and satiny I had to wonder for a moment if she was wearing a wig.
I stood there for a moment, not sure what to do. I couldnât tear my eyes from my twinâs, couldnât stop seeing the bruises that had blackened her face a few hours ago, the swollen lump of her eye and the blood soaking her pajamas. My sickly, frail twin who once broke both legs dropping a foot from the monkey bars, who was so tiny, so skeletal that Mom had to buy her clothes from the childrenâs department ⦠my sister was transformed as though sheâd spent the night in a chrysalis and had been reborn into a new body. A healthy, strong, perfect body.
âIs it true?â I asked her. âYouâre ⦠youâreâ¦â
She beamed at me, her eyes filling with tears, and nodded. âSo much for not living to see my next birthday.â
There was a chair next to Erinâs bed. I dropped into it before my watery knees gave out. Erin had terrible eyesight. When she wasnât wearing her glasses, she tended to squint like a mole. But her glasses were gone, and her eyes were wide open.
âWhat do we do now?â I asked the room.
My mom and Erin shared a furtive glance.
âPlead ignorance,â my mom said, keeping her voice low in case anyone was listening outside the door. âNo matter what they ask, we donât remember anything, all right? Kenna, itâs especially important that you remain vague.â
I turned to Erin and saw her clear, bright eyes fill with tears and her chin begin to quiver.
âDo you remember?â I asked softly.
She licked her lips and swallowed. âYou brought us back,â she whispered. âI was outside my body, just sort of drifting. Then I felt this tug, like I was a balloon on a string, and you were the one holding the end.â She smiled sadly and wiped her eyes as the tears dripped down her nose. âYou saved us. You saved me .â
I wanted to tell her no, she was mistaken. I
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