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disappointed that very few of my recommendations contained in my last report had beenaddressed, and that I was not impressed with what I had seen that morning.
    The teacher’s eyes bulged in indignation and her lips drooped in obvious displeasure. I rather expected a spirited defence of her teaching but Mrs Sidebottom glanced up at the clock on the wall and, with an air of ingrained disapproval, informed me that it was her lunch hour and it was in her contract that she should have a one-hour break in the middle of the day.
    As I saw her head for the door, I knew it would prove very difficult to dismiss such a teacher. The more I thought about it, the more I was reminded of the words of Mr Nelson, the headmaster of King Henry’s College in Brindcliffe. When, the previous year, I broached the possibility of instituting disciplinary proceedings against a member of his staff, he had leaned back in his chair and remarked: ‘As you will be well aware, it is very difficult to do anything about a teacher in terms of disciplinary action unless he runs off with a sixth-form girl or steals the dinner money.’
    Following the acrimonious interviews, I promised Mr Harrison that I would return before half-term, accompanied by my colleagues, to undertake a more thorough inspection. In the interim, I told him, I would see the Chief Inspector of Schools and discuss with her the possibility of starting competency proceedings. I advised the head teacher to keep a careful and thorough record of all incidents, infringements, conversations and refusals to carry out instructions on the part of the two teachers. I agreed with him that it would prove difficult to dismiss either of them, particularly since both teachers were so established and well connected locally. Neither lesson I had observed was disastrous but neither was good. The teachers were not incompetent: they prepared their lessons, albeit scantily, marked the work, albeit over-zealously, they were punctual, had few absences and had good discipline. It was just that their teaching was lacklustre and short of challenge and they both had an unfortunate manner with the children.
    â€˜I should point out, Mr Phinn,’ said Mr Harrison, as I madea move to leave, ‘you made similar comments in your last report, before my time, of course, and you promised to return to the school to see if progress had been made, that your recommendations had been implemented and to offer support and advice.’
    â€˜I did, yes,’ I replied, feeling decidedly guilty. ‘It’s just that there were quite a few pressing matters and –’
    â€˜And you never got around to it.’
    â€˜No, I never got around to it,’ I repeated. ‘I should have followed things up.’
    â€˜It’s just that had you done as you had promised,’ said the head teacher, ‘things might not have turned out quite as badly as they have.’
    â€˜Well, I can assure you, Mr Harrison,’ I told him, ‘that I will follow things up this time.’
    â€˜I hope so,’ he murmured. ‘I do hope so.’
    When I reached the gates of the school I found two boys sitting on the steps, their elbows on their knees and their heads cupped in their hands. It was Charlie and the lad from Mrs Sidebottom’s class called William. I stood behind them and eavesdropped.
    â€˜I’ll tell thee what, our Charlie, I can’t get mi ’ead round all this stuff abaat speykin’ proper what we’re a-doin wi’ Missis faffing Sitheebum. We say “path”, she says “paath”. We say “grass” and she says “graas”. We say “luck” and she says “loook”. We say “buck” and she says “boook”. It’s reight confusin’.’
    â€˜Tha dooan’t wants to tek no notice, our Billy. I ’ad all that carry-on when I were in Missis Sitheebum’s class, and she nivver changed me,’ his