unless any new evidence comes to light, we’re treating your case as an accident, so you can rest a bit easier.’
‘Oh, okay, an accident.’ I repeat the words. To be honest, I didn’t really consider the fact that it could be anything else. No one gave me any reason to believe otherwise.
‘Yes,’ she continues. ‘After investigation, it appears you went rowing very early on Sunday morning,’ she says. ‘A fishing vessel found your abandoned boat out in the Channel this morning. We think you must have capsized, hit your head and been swept out to sea which is how you ended up on Southbourne Beach.’
‘Wow,’ I say.
‘Yes. Looks like you’re one very lucky lady. You could easily have drowned out there.’
‘Wow,’ I say again, sinking down onto one of the kitchen stools.
‘Are you okay?’ she asks.
‘Yes,’ I reply. ‘I’m fine. I guess it’s just a relief to finally know what happened.’
‘Of course.’
We chat for a few moments more. I tell her about my mum calling, and about my brain scan results, and she asks me to contact her if I remember anything else that could be important. But, apart from that, this feels like the end of it. Now, it’s simply a case of me trying to regain my memories and get on with my life.
I hang up the phone, exhausted. The room feels suddenly darker, the evening turning to night. Through the open doors to the balcony, I see yellow and white lights winking on along the river. My supper is still out there on the table, but I no longer feel hungry. I think again about the police woman’s words. I was swept out to sea. How frightened I must have been. No wonder I blocked it out. It really is a miracle that I survived at all. I realise my left leg is trembling, and my breathing is becoming heavier. I need to calm down. Maybe I’m in shock. I breathe in slowly through my nose, and out through my mouth. Deep steadying breaths. My fingers tingle and my head feels light, like there’s nothing in it. I realise I’m about to pass out, so I purposely slide off the stool and sink to the floor. That way, I won’t have far to fall . . .
Chapter Eleven
I open my eyes to find myself staring at the cream sofa back. I remember last night – passing out, then coming to on the kitchen floor. I managed to haul myself up and gulp down a glass of water before making it onto the sofa, curling up and falling asleep. Now, it’s morning, and I turn over and blink at the brightness. My neck is cricked where I slept with my head pressed up against the arm of the sofa. Yesterday’s memories wash over me like waves. My mum calling . . . DS Wright from CID telling me how I capsized in the sea . . . my lunch with Piers. Everything hits me, buffeting my brain with an overload of information. I close my eyes and turn over to face the back of the sofa again, wishing I could go back to sleep. To oblivion. It hurts to think.
But, I remember, I’m supposed to be going to London today. I could cancel, I suppose, but I really do want to meet my mother and sister. They appear to be the only family I’ve got. They could be the ones to help me get my memories back. I take a breath, open my eyes and sit up too quickly, feeling like I left my head on the sofa cushion. After a few seconds, I feel steadier, the room comes back into focus so I lurch shakily to my feet. I notice that I left the doors to the balcony open all night, and a coolish breeze has ensured the room isn’t too stifling. My tuna salad and glass of Prosecco must still be out there, too, wilted and gone flat.
My dress is crumpled, my mouth tastes vile and I have a pounding headache. First things first, I need to find some paracetamol or aspirin, brush my teeth, have a shower then make myself some breakfast. After that, I’ll tackle train times and the rest.
Two and a half hours later, I’m on the train, staring out of the window, the chair material hot and prickly beneath my thin cotton dress. Opposite me, two
Julianna Blake
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