The Gaze

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Authors: Elif Shafak
Tags: Fiction, Literary, General
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his smiling face was growing pale seemed in danger of freezing, onto this sledge. His aim was first to get away from the sea and to find shelter. The rest he would think about later. Not that there was much to think about. He had a feeling he was going to make a fortune in these still undiscovered lands. This had to be a sable heaven. And who knew, perhaps it was even close to the Pogicha. Perhaps he was very close to that magnificence of which he’d always dreamed, to the boundless plenty, to his elegant lady.
    As Timofei Ankidinov walked, pulling the sledge behind him, he kept his eyes on the land onto which they’d not yet stepped; his friend on the sledge, his eyes wide open, silently watched the road along which they’d passed.
    Suddenly an indistinct shape passed in front of them. It was a sable, at least five times bigger than other sables. It passed without noticing the men and a little further on disappeared from sight.
    When Timofei Ankidinov saw this enormous sable he was so surprised and so excited that he had difficulty keeping himself from crying out. He didn’t say anything to the sailor. He changed the sledge’s course, and started following the sable’s tracks. The tracks dwindled, and stopped in front of a small mound. As the sable trapper approached noiselessly and began brushing the snow off the mound, he understood that it was a large, overturned basket. This discovery excited him even more. Perhaps under this basket was a door that opened onto the Pogicha. Perhaps all the sables in Siberia were succeeding in hiding from the trappers by passing through this door. If it could swallow such a big sable as that one, there was definitely a priceless mystery inside it.
    ‘Perhaps it would be better if we didn’t look. It could be a trap for trappers. Or a Siberian curse.’
    As the sailor said this, he was trying to straighten out. Timofei Ankidinov look sourly at his face. He would never allow the Pogicha and its enormous sables to belong to anyone else. He pretended to stop looking, returned to the sledge, and suddenly attacked the man lying on it. The sailor, who was very weak and who was not expecting an attack like this, was so astounded that even as his body was being stabbed he didn’t put up any resistance.
    bloodinthesnowbloodinthesnowbloodinthesnowmansnowman.
    Trembling wildly with excitement, Timofei Ankidinov looked around. There was a lot of blood around. Everything he saw had turned red. He cleaned off the blood that filled his eyes. He flung the bloody dagger far away and approached the overturned basket. He opened it and looked inside.
    Sable and boy, two twin souls, two existences linked by blood, two balls of sadness, two strange faces, two confused hallucinations, boy and sable…Their two souls, causing each other to increase, were on the point of melting into one, but their union was left half completed. With the opening of the basket the daylight dove in with a brazen smile, followed by the stranger’s avaricious stare. And at such an intimate moment. They had to be far from watching eyes; they definitely ought not to be seen. The spell was broken. It was all left half finished, and temporary. Now the boy and the sable were struggling to bring back the half that was each one’s own body. Since there was only one body present. Because the spell had been broken right in the middle of their union, they could neither step back and return to their former states, nor could they step forward and complete their transformation.
    The light that had torn that darkness, that counted intimacy for nothing, disappeared the way it arrived. Timofei Ankidinov’s mouth hung open with surprise, and his eyes grew to the size of crystal balls from terror as he looked at the creature under the basket.
    The military governor of Tobolsk was lying on his back, gulping his drink and picking at the scabs of the wound that had appeared at the end of his nose several weeks ago and somehow wouldn’t heal.

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