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Authors: I. J. Parker
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be under suspicion for Kiyowara’s murder, I will try to clear my name, but this, as Kobe tells me, may cost me my position and rank. We would have to give up this house and move to one of the provinces.’
He saw her tense and fold her arms protectively around her belly. ‘Forever?’ she asked with a little gasp.
He regretted his abruptness, but it was too late now. ‘It may not happen, but if it does… I can barely maintain this house at the best of times, and we shall need the funds I can raise on the sale to make a new life.’
‘It is your ancestral home, Akitada,’ she protested, her voice breaking. ‘It has been in your family since Heian-kyo was founded. Oh, Akitada!’
He flushed with shame. ‘I know you’re disappointed in me – not perhaps on your account, but on behalf of our unborn son. I can only say how very sorry I am. I have tried, Tamako, but I cannot fight against the determination of those in power. The best I can do is to protect my family by removing them from danger and poverty.’ He put his face in his hands. ‘I’ve failed to protect you once before and lost my son. Even if I lose my position, I shall at least not fail to protect you again.’
She said nothing.
He lowered his hands. When their eyes met, he saw tears in hers.
‘Thank you,’ she said, ‘but I wonder if you understood my concern. It isn’t for myself or our unborn children that I protest, but for you. It isn’t like you to give up so easily. This house is a symbol of Sugawara persistence. Don’t sell it. We shall find a way to keep it, even if we must go wherever fate takes us. Only, can it wait until this child is born?’
Of course. I never… You did not think we were to leave immediately?’
She chuckled weakly. ‘You came with such a fierce look on your face that I thought you wanted me to start packing at once.’
Relief washed over him. ‘But the rest… You would not mind my losing both position and rank? I doubt I shall ever be able to regain them after this.’
‘I’m your wife,’ she said firmly. ‘Have I ever given you cause to doubt my loyalty?’
‘No. Never.’ He had doubted her in the past, but he had been wrong. It had been he who had been disloyal to her. Ashamed, he took her hand and held it to his heart. ‘I shall try to be a better husband,’ he said, then left quickly.
He went to see Nakatoshi first. Nakatoshi had been his clerk when he had run the Ministry of Justice for the absent Soga. Meanwhile, the able Nakatoshi had been promoted and transferred. He was the only man he knew who would help him in this undertaking and be discreet about it.
He found the young man in an office in the Ministry of Ceremonial. He sat behind a very neat desk, dictating a letter to a scribe. His fortunes had changed quickly: he was now a junior-grade secretary in the Bureau of Ranks.
Dismissing the scribe, Nakatoshi rose and greeted Akitada with effusive pleasure.
‘I’m impressed,’ said Akitada, when seated, looking around the fine room. ‘You’ve done well for yourself. But no one deserves it more, and I expect you’ll rise quickly now.’
Nakatoshi made a face. ‘The fact is that I miss working in the Ministry of Justice. This is all pretty dull stuff. But one must consider the welfare of one’s family. I’m married now, and we’re looking forward to a child.’ He blushed a little with pride. ‘It’s wonderful that you stopped by and I could share my news with you.’
Akitada felt guilty that he had not looked in on Nakatoshi before, all the more so because he now wanted a favor. He said, ‘My heartiest congratulations. We also – my wife and I – are expecting. Any day, in fact.’
Nakatoshi’s face broke into a huge smile. ‘Oh, excellent news, sir. I’m so very glad. I’m sure you’re particularly looking forward to this child. After the tragedy of last year, you’ll finally enjoy the happiness of being a father again.’
Happiness? Akitada was acutely aware
He saw her tense and fold her arms protectively around her belly. ‘Forever?’ she asked with a little gasp.
He regretted his abruptness, but it was too late now. ‘It may not happen, but if it does… I can barely maintain this house at the best of times, and we shall need the funds I can raise on the sale to make a new life.’
‘It is your ancestral home, Akitada,’ she protested, her voice breaking. ‘It has been in your family since Heian-kyo was founded. Oh, Akitada!’
He flushed with shame. ‘I know you’re disappointed in me – not perhaps on your account, but on behalf of our unborn son. I can only say how very sorry I am. I have tried, Tamako, but I cannot fight against the determination of those in power. The best I can do is to protect my family by removing them from danger and poverty.’ He put his face in his hands. ‘I’ve failed to protect you once before and lost my son. Even if I lose my position, I shall at least not fail to protect you again.’
She said nothing.
He lowered his hands. When their eyes met, he saw tears in hers.
‘Thank you,’ she said, ‘but I wonder if you understood my concern. It isn’t for myself or our unborn children that I protest, but for you. It isn’t like you to give up so easily. This house is a symbol of Sugawara persistence. Don’t sell it. We shall find a way to keep it, even if we must go wherever fate takes us. Only, can it wait until this child is born?’
Of course. I never… You did not think we were to leave immediately?’
She chuckled weakly. ‘You came with such a fierce look on your face that I thought you wanted me to start packing at once.’
Relief washed over him. ‘But the rest… You would not mind my losing both position and rank? I doubt I shall ever be able to regain them after this.’
‘I’m your wife,’ she said firmly. ‘Have I ever given you cause to doubt my loyalty?’
‘No. Never.’ He had doubted her in the past, but he had been wrong. It had been he who had been disloyal to her. Ashamed, he took her hand and held it to his heart. ‘I shall try to be a better husband,’ he said, then left quickly.
He went to see Nakatoshi first. Nakatoshi had been his clerk when he had run the Ministry of Justice for the absent Soga. Meanwhile, the able Nakatoshi had been promoted and transferred. He was the only man he knew who would help him in this undertaking and be discreet about it.
He found the young man in an office in the Ministry of Ceremonial. He sat behind a very neat desk, dictating a letter to a scribe. His fortunes had changed quickly: he was now a junior-grade secretary in the Bureau of Ranks.
Dismissing the scribe, Nakatoshi rose and greeted Akitada with effusive pleasure.
‘I’m impressed,’ said Akitada, when seated, looking around the fine room. ‘You’ve done well for yourself. But no one deserves it more, and I expect you’ll rise quickly now.’
Nakatoshi made a face. ‘The fact is that I miss working in the Ministry of Justice. This is all pretty dull stuff. But one must consider the welfare of one’s family. I’m married now, and we’re looking forward to a child.’ He blushed a little with pride. ‘It’s wonderful that you stopped by and I could share my news with you.’
Akitada felt guilty that he had not looked in on Nakatoshi before, all the more so because he now wanted a favor. He said, ‘My heartiest congratulations. We also – my wife and I – are expecting. Any day, in fact.’
Nakatoshi’s face broke into a huge smile. ‘Oh, excellent news, sir. I’m so very glad. I’m sure you’re particularly looking forward to this child. After the tragedy of last year, you’ll finally enjoy the happiness of being a father again.’
Happiness? Akitada was acutely aware
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