The Case of the Dirty Bird

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Authors: Gary Paulsen
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could miss all those parakeets?”
    “It was the broom,” Dunc said. “Mrs. Burdgett’s broom. She was wild with it.”
    She’d broken most of the lamps, someknickknacks, a porcelain figure, and a front window, and the two boys had followed the cat out and hadn’t been back.
    “I’ve been doing a little research,” Dunc said.
    “That’s how all this started, remember?”
    “No, now listen. Parrots are always associated with who?”
    “Fertilizer companies?”
    “Come on, be serious. Who do you always think of when you think of parrots?”
    Amos frowned, thinking. “Well, I guess sailors.”
    “Yeah—but what
kind
of sailor?”
    “One that stinks?”
    “Amos …”
    “All right, I don’t know.”
    “A pirate. You always see parrots on pirates’ shoulders, don’t you? I mean in pictures and things?”
    Amos thought about it, nodded. “All right, sometimes. But you also see them in beer commercials.”
    “No—not this time. Now listen. Here’s this old, old parrot. Maybe a hundred and fifty years old. He’s so old—”
    “He stinks.”
    “Amos. Quit that. He’s so old he could have belonged to a pirate. We live on a river not too far from an ocean. So what if he belonged to a pirate and the pirate lived a long time ago and maybe he knows something?”
    “Like where a buried treasure is, because he said ‘treasure map.’ Is that what you’re saying?”
    “Well—it could be.”
    Amos shook his head. “Remember now, remember what happened the time you bought a metal detector and we were going to find that treasure left by the Spanish conquistadors?”
    “So it didn’t work out.” Dunc shrugged. “I can’t always be right.”
    “Always?
Always
be right? We must have found close to a million old beer cans and bottle caps and nails. I don’t remember a single bit of gold from the Spanish conquistadors.”
    “Well, that was a magazine article. They’re not always too dependable.”
    “And this parrot is?”
    “I think so. I mean I think it’s worth a shot. He said ‘treasure map,’ and he seems to respond to certain code words.”
    “Those ‘code words’ could get us arrested, or at least get me restricted until I’m about forty. The last time I said the one that I used when I hit my elbow and my dad heard me, I was spitting Ivory for a month.”
    “I thought he was more progressive than that.”
    “Right. He’s fine on letting me do things alone, but if I swear—well, I’d rather not think about it.”
    “So I’ll do the swearing. You’ll see, it’ll be different this time.”
    “Well …”
    “Come on, let’s go back to the pet store and see the parrot again. Maybe the owner has a list of the people who have owned the parrot. That might help. I mean, if it
was
a treasure and we missed it, you’d never forgive yourself.”
    “Well …”
    “Then, too, there’s Melissa.”
    “What about her?”
    “Well, if you’re a millionaire or maybe even more, she might take notice of you.”
    Amos rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah. I could get a car, a red sports car, and learn to drive or have somebody drive me until I was old enough for a license. It could work.”
    And Dunc knew he had him.

Dunc stared at the parrot.
    The parrot stared at Dunc. If anything, it looked worse than it had the time before. It seemed to have lost more feathers and looked to Amos like a large, plucked,
ugly
chicken.
    The bottom of the cage was half an inch deep in what the parrot dumped.
    And it smelled worse than before.
    Dunc tried another word, one he’d seen written on the back of a biker’s T-shirt. He whispered it cautiously, looking around the store first to make certain nobody was within hearing range.
    The parrot ignored him, looked away, looked back, belched, reached up with one claw, and delicately scratched a runny sore on his neck.
    “He’s not answering you,” Amos said.
    “Thanks. I figured that out.”
    “That’s the fourth word you’ve used. I didn’t know you

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