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broomstick straight when Daddy slammed out of the front door and Momma threw something across the room. I wanted my brother to say everything was okay. Instead, he rubbed his hands on his legs as if they were sweaty, then let his arms hang down between them. I stared at the scabs on his knees.
    He blinked, and he didn’t want me to see him cry, so he ran off.
    I ran to my brothers’ closet, closed the door, shut my eyes, and rode away on Fionadala’s back. Her mane flew in my face while we climbed higher and higher. Sister mountain laughed when we tickled its sides. All I saw was misty clouds. All I felt was wind and horse hair pushing up against my face.

    The next week, Momma was more worrisome. She went around the house, back and forth, talking to herself, drinking from a pickling jar filled with something that looked like mud with bits of grass swirled in it. Three times a day she jumped off the steps and ran around the house five times. Sometimes Andy ran with her, giggling as if it was the funniest game.
    Daddy stayed at work later and later. One night, he grabbed Momma by the shoulders, his face close to hers, and asked, “What have you done, Katie?” He poured his own tonic and went up to the empty house on the hill. I barely could see him up there. Micah said he caught him crying up there one time, but I couldn’t picture my daddy crying.
    Just when I thought we’d all go insane with the craziness, Momma held onto her stomach as she dialed. She said, “Ruby, come get me. I think I done it,” then leaned her head on the wall. “Well, if it don’t, then I’ll do that other thing.” She hung up, and dialed up Mrs. Mendel next. “Can you come watch the kids after my sister gets here? I need to go up to the hospital.”
    My brothers stayed out of her way. I had the buzzing hornets stinging my head something fierce, but I stood by her bed as she put clothes in a suitcase.
    She looked at me, her eyes red and puffed up. “Virginia Kate, I got to go up to the hospital. Mrs. Mendel will be here. You kids better behave.” She grabbed her stomach and cried.
    “Why you going to the hospital, Momma?”
    She didn’t answer; she just pushed me out of the way and went to the window with her suitcase to watch for Aunt Ruby.
    On the living room couch, Andy had his legs stuck straight out in front of him, and Micah had his arms crossed over his chest.
    When Aunt Ruby honked her horn, Momma dialed on the phone again. “Frederick, I’m going up to the hospital.” She hung up and walked out the door. When I tried to follow her, she screamed at me to get my butt back in the house. I went to the window and my brothers came to stand with me to watch as Aunt Ruby drove away with Momma lying in the backseat.
    Mrs. Mendel took care of us while Momma was gone. Daddy stayed gone, too. It was quiet in the house. Andy didn’t carry on as much as I thought he would. Micah sulled up and drew pictures of ugly things. I stayed in my room, crying in Grandma Faith’s quilt. I cried until I was tired of it and decided I wasn’t going to cry anymore. I’d dry up every tear since crying didn’t do one bit of good. I told Grandma Faith, “No more crying.” But I heard her cry.
    Not long after, Daddy brought Momma home and she was plumb wore out. Their faces were puffed and red. Momma went straight to bed and Daddy went back up to the house on the hill with a box in his hand. Nothing was ever said about what happened. No baby ever came. It was never talked about again.
    After that, there wasn’t much happy laughing going on, and booze bottles lined up one, two, three, four, and more.
     

Chapter 7
    Today
    Digging through the memories has left my back stiff and sore. My heart is sore, too, taken out of my chest, stomped on, and shoved back in. I get up and stretch, looking at the Popsicle-stick frame holding our faces. That Easter changed everything, but maybe everything would have broken into pieces anyway, with or without Easter