her. âI need to deal with this,â he said, and headed for the bathroom, leaving her lying there feeling a little foolish and vulnerable in the aftermath of so much raw emotion. She scooted under the quilt and sat up, hugging her knees, waiting for him to come back from the bathroom and tell her it had all been a mistake.
As if she didnât know that!
Or she could get up, put on her dressing gown and go downstairs and clear the dining table.
âDaisy.â
Damn. Too slow.
She looked up, her eyes lingering on his body, making an inventory, storing up the memories. This wouldnât happen again. She knew that. He was about to tell her that, just as soon as heâd pulled on his clothes and that beautiful, perfectly honed body was hidden from her eyes.
Or partly. Dressed only in the jeans, he sat on the edge ofthe bed and took her hand, pulling it away from its death-grip on the quilt and folding it inside his own.
Here we go, she thought. The gentle put-down.
âThat was incredible,â he said softly. âAnd I want to stay, to make love to you all night, but it isnât going to happen. It canât happen. Iâm going home to get a decent nightâs sleep, and in the morning weâll go to work and act as if nothingâs changed, and then afterwards weâll talk about it, OK?â
She swallowed. âItâs OK, Ben, I know it was a mistake.â
His thumb stroked her wrist. âIt was, but weâve done it now, and itâs changed things, and I donât think we can really just put them back the way they were. We have to find a way to move forwards from this.â
She nodded. They did, but she couldnât imagine how. She didnât know what she wanted, she just knew nothing so special had ever happened to her and she was in no way finished with it, but of course nothing had really changed. It was just different, but it still had no future, and a feeling of impending loss settled over her.
âWeâll talk tomorrow,â she agreed. âIâll cook for you.â
âNo. Itâs Friday tomorrow, isnât it? Damn. Iâm at Janeâs with Florence, and Jane might have plans to go out. Itâll have to be Sunday night, after Iâve put Florence to bed and come home. We can get a takeaway or something.â
âI can cook, you know,â she said, finding a smile from somewhere.
He smiled back, his eyes troubled and yet tender. âIâm sure you can. Donât go to a lot of trouble, I donât know how late Iâll be. Janeâs away for the weekend and I canât leave till sheâs back.â He sighed softly. âI have to go now, itâs getting really late and if I donât leave Iâll end up staying and I donât think thatâs a good idea, but Iâll see you in the morning. Maybe we can grab a coffee.â
He leant over and kissed her, his lips tender and lingering, and then he straightened up, gave her a tiny, slightly sad little smile and then went out, and she lay and listened as he closed her front door behind himself, opened his own, went up the stairs and into his bedroom.
She heard him moving around, then he went still, and she could swear she could hear him breathing on the other side of the wall.
âGoodnight, Daisy,â he said, his voice soft but clear in the quiet.
She didnât answer. She was too busy wondering what the future held. She didnât have a clue, but she was pretty sure she wouldnât like itâ¦
They didnât have time for a coffee on Friday morning, and they didnât have time for lunch, either.
He disappeared off her radar that afternoon to see Florence and reappeared on Sunday night at seven, by which time sheâd had plenty of opportunities to think about their relationship and where it was going. And sheâd come to exactly no conclusions.
âYou look bushed,â she said, letting him in, and he gave a tired
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