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Authors: Emma Spring
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and he’s completely ignored me every time I’ve tried to contact him, and in every way too. He won’t answer my messages or calls, he never seems to be home, and he hasn’t been online at all, not even once – not that he ever was much really, but still... it’s odd. It’s as if he’s just vanished from the face of the Earth, and it’s driving me crazy.
I thought that today would be different, I assumed that whatever reason he has for ignoring me would be overridden by what this day is, but it seems like my naive hope was wrong. Today is my birthday, and he still hasn’t been in touch. We had all these plans, we were going to do all of these cool things, and instead I find myself alone and completely devastated. Marco Fabbri has absolutely shattered my heart into one million pieces, and I don't even know what to do with myself.
I sit on the edge of my bed, willing the tears to fall, just to prove that I can feel something, but nothing is happening. It’s as if my insides have frozen over, and they’re too numb to experience anything anymore. It’s as if I’m nothing more than a shell of my former self.
“Knock, knock,” my dad calls through the door, in that patronizing tone that he’s started to use recently. “Can I come in, sweetie?”
No, I think.
“Yes,” I say.
He walks in, quickly displaying a smug smile. This should have my hackles rising and my warning bells on alert, but I’m too numb to feel anything – all I can do is look up at him blankly, like an idiot, waiting for him to get to whatever his point is.
“You okay, dad?” I ask, suddenly noticing how monotone my voice sounds. “Is everything alright?”
“I actually have some really good news for you – for all of us.” He waits for a moment, as if to build the anticipation, all the while I rock lightly back and forth, desperately wanting this to be over already. “I have been offered a job in Jackson, in Wyoming. It’s more prestigious than what I do now, so the money will be better. I know this is a tough time for you at school, but I’ve already checked out the education system there and it’s amazing...”
“What does mom think?” I interrupt, already needing a way to put an end to this. My mom loves New York – there’s no way she will want to move to some small town in the middle of nowhere!
I don't even know how to feel about all of this – it’s almost unbelievable, so if I put a stop to it before it can really begin, then I won’t have to even consider it, never mind process what it might mean for me.
“She’s very keen to move,” he replies firmly, as if that settles the matter. “She agrees with me that we all need a fresh start.”
With that comment, I instantly know what this is really about. This has nothing do with any job or school or change of life – this is to keep me away from Marco once and for all. He doesn’t realize that his warnings don't matter anyway, Marco is avoiding me anyway.
“No,” I insist quickly, shaking my head vigorously. “I don’t want to go.”
“Look, love,” he talks to me as if I’m a child. “This really isn’t about you.” He’s lying, but I squeeze my lips shut, knowing that arguing will only get him to dig his heels in deeper. “This is about all of us. We all need this. And to be honest, sweetie, it doesn’t really seem like you have anything keeping you here anyway. Your boyfriend is no longer in the picture, you don't seem to spend much time with that friend of yours anymore, and your grades aren’t what they used to be.” He stuns me with this admission – mostly because he’s accurate. It really doesn’t seem like I have anything to keep me here anymore... except for the promise that maybe one day I’ll be able to get Marco back. “So there really is no point in disputing this. It’s happening, so the quicker you adjust the better for all us.”
As he walks from the room, the emotion finally rises to the surface and the tears spill
I thought that today would be different, I assumed that whatever reason he has for ignoring me would be overridden by what this day is, but it seems like my naive hope was wrong. Today is my birthday, and he still hasn’t been in touch. We had all these plans, we were going to do all of these cool things, and instead I find myself alone and completely devastated. Marco Fabbri has absolutely shattered my heart into one million pieces, and I don't even know what to do with myself.
I sit on the edge of my bed, willing the tears to fall, just to prove that I can feel something, but nothing is happening. It’s as if my insides have frozen over, and they’re too numb to experience anything anymore. It’s as if I’m nothing more than a shell of my former self.
“Knock, knock,” my dad calls through the door, in that patronizing tone that he’s started to use recently. “Can I come in, sweetie?”
No, I think.
“Yes,” I say.
He walks in, quickly displaying a smug smile. This should have my hackles rising and my warning bells on alert, but I’m too numb to feel anything – all I can do is look up at him blankly, like an idiot, waiting for him to get to whatever his point is.
“You okay, dad?” I ask, suddenly noticing how monotone my voice sounds. “Is everything alright?”
“I actually have some really good news for you – for all of us.” He waits for a moment, as if to build the anticipation, all the while I rock lightly back and forth, desperately wanting this to be over already. “I have been offered a job in Jackson, in Wyoming. It’s more prestigious than what I do now, so the money will be better. I know this is a tough time for you at school, but I’ve already checked out the education system there and it’s amazing...”
“What does mom think?” I interrupt, already needing a way to put an end to this. My mom loves New York – there’s no way she will want to move to some small town in the middle of nowhere!
I don't even know how to feel about all of this – it’s almost unbelievable, so if I put a stop to it before it can really begin, then I won’t have to even consider it, never mind process what it might mean for me.
“She’s very keen to move,” he replies firmly, as if that settles the matter. “She agrees with me that we all need a fresh start.”
With that comment, I instantly know what this is really about. This has nothing do with any job or school or change of life – this is to keep me away from Marco once and for all. He doesn’t realize that his warnings don't matter anyway, Marco is avoiding me anyway.
“No,” I insist quickly, shaking my head vigorously. “I don’t want to go.”
“Look, love,” he talks to me as if I’m a child. “This really isn’t about you.” He’s lying, but I squeeze my lips shut, knowing that arguing will only get him to dig his heels in deeper. “This is about all of us. We all need this. And to be honest, sweetie, it doesn’t really seem like you have anything keeping you here anyway. Your boyfriend is no longer in the picture, you don't seem to spend much time with that friend of yours anymore, and your grades aren’t what they used to be.” He stuns me with this admission – mostly because he’s accurate. It really doesn’t seem like I have anything to keep me here anymore... except for the promise that maybe one day I’ll be able to get Marco back. “So there really is no point in disputing this. It’s happening, so the quicker you adjust the better for all us.”
As he walks from the room, the emotion finally rises to the surface and the tears spill