Read Online Staying Fat for Sarah Byrnes by Chris Crutcher - Free Book Online Page B

Ellerby, I would be the first on his secret ballot for candidates to be buried in a shallow grave with a small air pipe pushing up into a bus garage.
    I say, “Sorry.” I’m not, but until Jody understands that beauty is only skin deep, I want to appear civil in her eyes.
    Brittain puts out his hand. “You guys sure got me the other day.”
    I don’t know what he’s talking about.
    â€œAt workout. It was a good move.”
    I smile and raise my eyebrows. It was a good move. I turn for my seat as the bell rings, but Mark catches mesoftly by the shoulder. “Could I ask you something?” Jody stands silently beside him.
    â€œSure.”
    â€œWhy did you guys do it?”
    â€œWhat do you mean?”
    â€œYou and Ellerby must really hate me. I hit ninety-seven repeats with you, and you sucked me into losing out on the last three. I can’t imagine ever doing that to either of you.”
    I can. My stare drifts to Jody. I’m guessing she believes Brittain was victimized by a couple of insensitive pagan mermen.
    â€œWe were just being ornery,” I say slowly, hoping to avoid alienating my future wife, “but you were on a free ride. I’d set the pace and you’d hang in. Ellerby would set the pace and you’d hang in. You never set the pace.”
    â€œAll you’d have had to do was ask,” he says. Then, “It wasn’t a very Christian thing to do, that’s all.”
    You don’t get very far into a conversation with Mark Brittain without hearing that word. It irritates me because what he really means is, “You’re wrong and I’m right and God knows it.” I want to tell him I’m not a Christian, but that won’t likely put me in better standing with Jody, who goes to Mark’s church, so I just look away.
    â€œYou could be a little more compassionate, Calhoune. You know, you guys run around in that car, making fun of important things and blaspheming, and you don’t have much consideration for the people you may hurt.”
    I’m caught. I mean, I can’t take a guy seriously when he’s using words like “blaspheming,” but I’m over a barrel if I don’t want to look like the worst kind of heretic in front of Jody. What I’d like to do is make Brittain horizontal, but that would only put me another rung lower on Jacob’s ladder in Jody’s eyes. It’s a close call, though. I’m pretty embarrassed, and if Brittain says much more I might at least have to do verbal surgery on him.
    Brittain looks wounded; my portrait as an ogre is complete. I make a note that he will not finish ahead of me on even one repeat today in workout. He and Jody walk off to their seats as I tell her, “Nice blouse.” Great moves, Mobe.
    â€œPark it,” Lemry says, scanning her attendance book. She moves to the front of her desk, hoisting herself up. “At the end of last class I asked each of you to be ready with a subject for your class presentation—something that addresses a contemporary social or psychological or spiritual dilemma. I asked that it besomething with particular meaning to your life. Now. Today. I gave you possibilities such as war, world hunger, abortion, the homeless, children’s rights, spiritual beliefs, political ideologies, et cetera. All I require is that you be willing to look at your subject from a personal perspective, that is, how the dilemma affects you.” She glances quickly around the room. “Anybody want to step up and save those who didn’t believe I meant what I said?”
    Ellerby’s hand shoots up. That’s a surprise. “To the rescue,” he says. “I want to talk about religion.”
    â€œAs long as you don’t try to lead us in prayer. It’s against the law.”
    â€œRest assured,” Ellerby says, “I won’t lead us in prayer. I’ll leave that to Brittain.”
    â€œAnd no