Read Online Smash Into You by Shelly Crane - Free Book Online Page B

shoes off."
                  I felt her yank them free and the thud of them hitting the floor.
                  She leaned over me and I smelled her. That clean, shampoo smell. She touched a spot on my neck and sighed. "Come on," she commanded. "To the bathroom we go."
                  She threw my arm around her shoulders and we trudged into the dingy bathroom. We stood in front of the mirror, the light blinking with its last breath above us, but even with that, I could still see it. Still see the thing that had made Marley sigh. At some point, nameless-girl must've kissed the side of my neck with her bright red lipstick. There was a clear imprint there. I also had a little on my lips. I leaned on the sink, feeling sick. I turned the water on and put a little soap on my hand, rubbing at the spot and then my mouth.
                  "Here," she said and handed me a toothbrush with paste on it. She must've bought that while she was out, too. I brushed hard and long. Eventually she took it from me, sat me on the toilet, and helped me take off my shirt. I hated that she was doing this. In my ill attempt to drown my sorrows because of the sorrow I'd caused her, I'd just made things worse.
                  She looked at my shoulder and hissed. "Oh, my..." She searched around and then ran to the bed and back. "OK, we've got to clean this."
                  She dabbed, poked, and put things on it. I was too far gone to care or feel it. She taped it all back up and helped me stand. She let me fall gently to the bed.
                  "You're gonna choke if you throw up." She climbed on the bed with me and tried to push me, to roll me over. She licked her bottom lip in frustration. So I did something epically stupid, but something I very much wanted to do.
                  And with my inhibitions low, I was apparently going for it.
                  I pulled her to my chest, my arms around her, and pressed my lips to her neck. I didn't kiss her, just pressed them there.
                  She was draped across me so I rolled so her legs were on top of us and she was partially under me. I blocked out the spinning room and tried to make her see. I just wanted her to see that I was so broken I didn't even know how to be human anymore. I felt the most raw I ever had and I needed her to see without me saying so that I was a good guy. I wasn't. I wanted her to run...but I wanted her to stay.
                  "Jude," she whispered and I opened my eyes. She looked confused. "I'm not her. You know that, right? I'm Marley."
                  I chuckled a little under my breath. "I know exactly who you are," I whispered against her jaw. She took a shuddering breath. I held her tightly, refusing to relinquish her. She didn't fight me and I didn't know why, but I wasn't about to ask.
                  "I didn't kiss her," I heard myself say, and I wasn't sure why I was supplying the info.
                  The lamp was on in the corner and I wanted it off, but couldn't move. I drifted. Bits and pieces fought through my mind. Lockers, a school, girls with too much make-up, a girl with a face that could melt hearts, but she was sad. Destroyed...I felt bad for her...
                  The next thing I knew, the light was winking from the window at me and I felt like my guts were boiling over. Wait, they were...
                  I bolted to the bathroom, scrambling over the body I was lying next to. I didn't even get to shut the door before I was hugging porcelain. My stomach wretched over and over and over again and then some more. An eternity later, I was sore all over, my head hurt as I laid it against the cool wood of the wall, and I felt too awful to be embarrassed. I heard the water running and then Marley was hunching down, putting the cold cloth on my forehead. I looked at her,