Sisters and Husbands

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Authors: Connie Briscoe
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for first marriages is lousy.
     But what about second marriages? It seems they would have a better success rate, since you learn something from the first.”
    “Actually, no, they don’t.”
    Cathy looked shocked.
    “Sorry, it’s true,” Evelyn said. “People don’t always learn much from their first marriages. They tend to repeat the same
     old patterns.”
    Cathy frowned. “Really? You mean if they marry a jerk the first time, they turn around and marry another jerk? How stupid.”
    Evelyn smiled. “Or they marry someone with the same incompatibilities. But that doesn’t mean that
you
can’t learn something and do better next time. You can break the pattern.”
    “I definitely don’t want to end up in divorce court again. It was nasty, a horrible experience for me.” Cathy shuddered visibly.
    “There’s probably only one way to be absolutely sure that won’t happen again.”
    Cathy frowned briefly, then blinked with enlightenment. “Oh, you mean don’t get married again in the first place?”
    Evelyn nodded.
    “You’re telling me that marriage always has pros and cons.”
    Evelyn nodded again. “So does being single. There are different kinds of risks or different pros and cons, as you put it.
     It all depends on what you prefer. Some prefer the freedom that comes with being single. But the downside is loneliness, and
     it can be a big downside when you’re an older woman. Not to mention the risk of all the STDs out there.”
    “Tell me about it.”
    “Not that you can’t catch things when you’re married, but ideally it’s less of a concern then. If you go for marriage, you’ll
     have someone to share things with, from bills to lovemaking and everything else. But that comes with the risk of losing it
     all and being hurt or maybe being trapped in a bad marriage that you can’t walk away from so easily. In the end, it’s about
     knowing yourself—your strengths and your vulnerabilities, your hopes and dreams—so you can make smart choices.”
    The more Evelyn listened to herself talk, the more she realized how much she wanted to stay married. The alternative didn’t
     sound too appealing for a woman her age. She tried to sound impartial as she counseled Cathy, but it was harder to do that
     now, given what she was going through in her own personal life.
    As soon as Cathy left, Evelyn moved to her desk and picked up the phone, not to call the caterer but to call Kevin once again.
     She would get to the caterer in due time, but she had been trying to reach Kevin since Monday, the day after he left, and
     she was tired of waiting for him to call her back. She wanted to hear his voice, and she didn’t even know his whereabouts.
     Was he still in a hotel, or had he moved to the apartment today as planned? It was utter nonsense that she had no idea where
     her husband was.
    She dialed his cell number. How ironic, she thought as she waited. The only way she could get in touch with her husband was
     through his cell phone. She listened as it rang and rang until finally his voice mail greeting came on. She twisted her lips
     impatiently until the greeting ended, then left yet another curt message for him to call her and slammed the phone down.
    How could Kevin walk out and not even bother to get in touch for three days? She felt like some desperate twenty-year-old
     calling her man again and again and praying that he would call her back. She hadn’t gone through crap like this in decades
     and she hated it. She was too old for such nonsense.
    She still had some good old-fashioned pride left in her. She would wait it out. If she gave Kevin some time, he would get
     in touch sooner or later. They had been together for so long. He needed her more than he realized. He needed his life with
     her more than he knew or was willing to admit. All his talk about trying to act white was foolish nonsense. Kevin had always
     been just as eager as she had to improve their lives, to have nice things for themselves

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