forcing his shaky hands to wipe it away.
For once, he didn’t know if they were shaking from the need to use drugs or because he was actually feeling nervous.
“What is it?”
Elias could tell that Caden was urging him to speak. Did he suspect something too? Could Caden sense that Elias was gay too? Did it matter? Why does it matter? Elias didn’t think it did but he felt something else.
“I’m -,” he mumbled, “I mean – can we get this place cleaned up?”
Caden almost looked relieved but Elias felt like kicking himself.
“Sure,” he blinked slowly, “c’mon, many hands make light work. That’s what my mom says.”
“Right,” Elias quickly jumped up, heading straight to the bathroom to stare at himself in the mirror.
Elias wanted to know who the man was staring back in the reflection, but he didn’t. Elias had always been so busy distracting himself, he had never taken a minute to get to know the guy inside.
***
As they cleaned the apartment, Caden couldn’t stop looking over at Elias, who was silently collecting beer cans. He could feel there was something wrong but it was obvious that Elias wasn’t ready to talk about it. Caden knew he was supposed to wait for Elias to open up to him but he wanted to stick his middle finger up to the training. He wanted to help Elias, even more so since listening to his mom. He wanted to let Elias know that he had somebody who cared, but he didn’t want to overstep that line. It’s bad enough that he knows you’re gay, you’ve just gone and made things totally weird with this guy.
“Elias, all of this drinking,” Caden broke the silence, “do you think you really need it?”
Shrugging, Elias tied up the trash bag and dumped it next to the front door. Caden could tell Elias had spent the last hour glancing at the fridge, wanting to grab a can of beer. Replacing one addiction with another just gave Elias a brand new problem to deal with.
“I need something,” he bit into his lip hard, “the days go so slowly. I need something to take my mind off everything.”
Caden knew trying to convince Elias about the health effects wouldn’t make a difference. He probably had people shouting those facts at him all of his life. They’d be completely meaningless, just the pleas of somebody put in a position to ‘ help ’.
“Do you not have any friends you could hang out with? What about your sister?”
Elias jumped up onto the kitchen counter, a soft smirk on his lips, “When you’re into drugs, your friends are your dealers. Take them out of the equation and you find yourself without anybody to call.”
Caden caught Elias’ eyes dart over to the fridge, but this time, his eyes landed on the piece of paper that Caden had left behind. Had Elias wanted to call Caden but felt too weird about it? Feeling his heart swell, he wanted to be that friend that Elias clearly craved. Deciding to make up his own rules, Caden threw caution to the wind, knowing that traditional methods weren’t going to work with Elias.
“Do you like lobster?”
“Lobster?” Elias’ tone was dismissive.
“The annual Maine Lobster Festival is in Havenmoore this weekend. If you’re free, we could go?”
“Together?” Elias squinted.
“It might be fun.”
Feeling his pulse increase, Caden pushed those thoughts to the back of his head. He wasn’t going to deny that he thought Elias was cute and that he wanted to be there for him but he knew that wasn’t his place. If he could be a friend to Elias and help get him through his court order clean and sober, that would fulfill him more than anything else.
“Lobster,” Elias pondered, “I can’t say I’ve ever tried it.”
“What?” Caden’s head shot back, “You live in Maine and Havenmoore’s docks are the biggest for miles around.”
“It was never a priority,” Elias shrugged.
“I won’t take no for an answer now,” he crossed his arms and rocked back on his heels, “you’re coming if you like
For once, he didn’t know if they were shaking from the need to use drugs or because he was actually feeling nervous.
“What is it?”
Elias could tell that Caden was urging him to speak. Did he suspect something too? Could Caden sense that Elias was gay too? Did it matter? Why does it matter? Elias didn’t think it did but he felt something else.
“I’m -,” he mumbled, “I mean – can we get this place cleaned up?”
Caden almost looked relieved but Elias felt like kicking himself.
“Sure,” he blinked slowly, “c’mon, many hands make light work. That’s what my mom says.”
“Right,” Elias quickly jumped up, heading straight to the bathroom to stare at himself in the mirror.
Elias wanted to know who the man was staring back in the reflection, but he didn’t. Elias had always been so busy distracting himself, he had never taken a minute to get to know the guy inside.
***
As they cleaned the apartment, Caden couldn’t stop looking over at Elias, who was silently collecting beer cans. He could feel there was something wrong but it was obvious that Elias wasn’t ready to talk about it. Caden knew he was supposed to wait for Elias to open up to him but he wanted to stick his middle finger up to the training. He wanted to help Elias, even more so since listening to his mom. He wanted to let Elias know that he had somebody who cared, but he didn’t want to overstep that line. It’s bad enough that he knows you’re gay, you’ve just gone and made things totally weird with this guy.
“Elias, all of this drinking,” Caden broke the silence, “do you think you really need it?”
Shrugging, Elias tied up the trash bag and dumped it next to the front door. Caden could tell Elias had spent the last hour glancing at the fridge, wanting to grab a can of beer. Replacing one addiction with another just gave Elias a brand new problem to deal with.
“I need something,” he bit into his lip hard, “the days go so slowly. I need something to take my mind off everything.”
Caden knew trying to convince Elias about the health effects wouldn’t make a difference. He probably had people shouting those facts at him all of his life. They’d be completely meaningless, just the pleas of somebody put in a position to ‘ help ’.
“Do you not have any friends you could hang out with? What about your sister?”
Elias jumped up onto the kitchen counter, a soft smirk on his lips, “When you’re into drugs, your friends are your dealers. Take them out of the equation and you find yourself without anybody to call.”
Caden caught Elias’ eyes dart over to the fridge, but this time, his eyes landed on the piece of paper that Caden had left behind. Had Elias wanted to call Caden but felt too weird about it? Feeling his heart swell, he wanted to be that friend that Elias clearly craved. Deciding to make up his own rules, Caden threw caution to the wind, knowing that traditional methods weren’t going to work with Elias.
“Do you like lobster?”
“Lobster?” Elias’ tone was dismissive.
“The annual Maine Lobster Festival is in Havenmoore this weekend. If you’re free, we could go?”
“Together?” Elias squinted.
“It might be fun.”
Feeling his pulse increase, Caden pushed those thoughts to the back of his head. He wasn’t going to deny that he thought Elias was cute and that he wanted to be there for him but he knew that wasn’t his place. If he could be a friend to Elias and help get him through his court order clean and sober, that would fulfill him more than anything else.
“Lobster,” Elias pondered, “I can’t say I’ve ever tried it.”
“What?” Caden’s head shot back, “You live in Maine and Havenmoore’s docks are the biggest for miles around.”
“It was never a priority,” Elias shrugged.
“I won’t take no for an answer now,” he crossed his arms and rocked back on his heels, “you’re coming if you like
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