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Authors: Casey Kelleher
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was concerned. No-one took the piss out of him. Paul had worked too hard , for too long , to risk his club for someone like Jay to ruin it all.
10
Sonia was sitting in a dull -grey cubical , at her son ’ s bedside. They had been at the hospital for over twelve hours and although the doctors had told her that he was not critical, she felt heart-broken. Following a thorough examination and numerous x-rays, they had given him some high dose painkillers and something to help him sleep. Several of his ribs were broken, along with his nose ; al though looking at all the congealed blood and cuts and bruises all over him , it had looked much worse on first glance.
S onia looked down at Jay’s swollen face and wondered how it had come to this. Sonia knew that he was no angel, far from it . I n fact , she knew a lot more than she would ever let on even to him , or anyone else for that matter. Even so she couldn’t help feeling guilty ; maybe that was why she always made excuses, always trying to justify his behaviour . S he should never have left him with Den, she should have taken him with her, brought him up properly . T his was her fault.
Sonia had walked out on Den when Jay was just a baby, after one too many beatings and endless mental abuse. She had nothing back then, and reasoned that when she sorted herself out she would go back for her son . But it had never quite worked that way. She seemed to be out of work more than in it those days. Sonia had always suffered with depression but Den had really knocked her confidence out of her and after finally realising she couldn’t go on , knowing that if she stayed with Den she would probably end up dead, she had packed her bags and left her son behind. She had never felt so lost and alone until then. The more she had sunk into her dark thoughts , the harder it had been for her to try and claw her way out of it . T here were days when she couldn’t function at all ; she hadn’t been able to physically tear herself from her filthy bed. Popping anti-depressants as if they were sweets , Sonia had spent a good few years walking around so dosed up that she may as well have been the walking dead.
The longer she had stayed away from Jay the harder it had been to go back for him, and she convinced herself that it would be better for Jay to stay put with his dad . She could barely look after herself, let alone another human being.
Thankfully , with a lot of help from a very good doctor and counsellor, slowly over the years Sonia had sorted herself out and had been over the moon when her son had started visiting her a few years back, feeling proud almost of the big stocky man he had grown into. S lowly , though, she had learnt the details of his sordid lifestyle. He lied to her at first of course. He had p retend ed his endless amounts of money were savings but the truth had come out eventually . She knew about the debt collecting, and the stealing, but the thing she hated the most was the drugs. Thankfully , after one or two occasions of some real dodgy people turning up at her door he had moved that side of the business somewhere else . S he didn’t want him dealing drugs at all, but at least now if he was going to do it, he did it as far away from her home as possible, sparing her from having the dregs of society turning up at her home at all hours , for a fix.
He was her son , and she was aware that she was partly responsible for the man that he had become, but she also knew that he was his father’s son, of that much she was certain.
Sonia touched Jay’s hand , thankful that this time he was going to be ok ay , but she was worried sick that next time he might not get off so lightly.
Kate pulled the cubical curtain open . S he put her hand over her mouth : the sight of Jay , black and blue , was clearly too much for her. Her poor baby , lying there all
10
Sonia was sitting in a dull -grey cubical , at her son ’ s bedside. They had been at the hospital for over twelve hours and although the doctors had told her that he was not critical, she felt heart-broken. Following a thorough examination and numerous x-rays, they had given him some high dose painkillers and something to help him sleep. Several of his ribs were broken, along with his nose ; al though looking at all the congealed blood and cuts and bruises all over him , it had looked much worse on first glance.
S onia looked down at Jay’s swollen face and wondered how it had come to this. Sonia knew that he was no angel, far from it . I n fact , she knew a lot more than she would ever let on even to him , or anyone else for that matter. Even so she couldn’t help feeling guilty ; maybe that was why she always made excuses, always trying to justify his behaviour . S he should never have left him with Den, she should have taken him with her, brought him up properly . T his was her fault.
Sonia had walked out on Den when Jay was just a baby, after one too many beatings and endless mental abuse. She had nothing back then, and reasoned that when she sorted herself out she would go back for her son . But it had never quite worked that way. She seemed to be out of work more than in it those days. Sonia had always suffered with depression but Den had really knocked her confidence out of her and after finally realising she couldn’t go on , knowing that if she stayed with Den she would probably end up dead, she had packed her bags and left her son behind. She had never felt so lost and alone until then. The more she had sunk into her dark thoughts , the harder it had been for her to try and claw her way out of it . T here were days when she couldn’t function at all ; she hadn’t been able to physically tear herself from her filthy bed. Popping anti-depressants as if they were sweets , Sonia had spent a good few years walking around so dosed up that she may as well have been the walking dead.
The longer she had stayed away from Jay the harder it had been to go back for him, and she convinced herself that it would be better for Jay to stay put with his dad . She could barely look after herself, let alone another human being.
Thankfully , with a lot of help from a very good doctor and counsellor, slowly over the years Sonia had sorted herself out and had been over the moon when her son had started visiting her a few years back, feeling proud almost of the big stocky man he had grown into. S lowly , though, she had learnt the details of his sordid lifestyle. He lied to her at first of course. He had p retend ed his endless amounts of money were savings but the truth had come out eventually . She knew about the debt collecting, and the stealing, but the thing she hated the most was the drugs. Thankfully , after one or two occasions of some real dodgy people turning up at her door he had moved that side of the business somewhere else . S he didn’t want him dealing drugs at all, but at least now if he was going to do it, he did it as far away from her home as possible, sparing her from having the dregs of society turning up at her home at all hours , for a fix.
He was her son , and she was aware that she was partly responsible for the man that he had become, but she also knew that he was his father’s son, of that much she was certain.
Sonia touched Jay’s hand , thankful that this time he was going to be ok ay , but she was worried sick that next time he might not get off so lightly.
Kate pulled the cubical curtain open . S he put her hand over her mouth : the sight of Jay , black and blue , was clearly too much for her. Her poor baby , lying there all
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