Read Online Retief and the Rascals by Keith Laumer - Free Book Online Page B

society!"
     
                "Bah!" Shinth snorted. "Ben,
you're incorrigible!" He stamped off into the darkness. A moment later his
breathy voice was to be heard again from the shadows: "Now, boys," he
whispered. "Be patient, I've got Ben so confused he doesn't know who's
paying off whom. Did you get the instructions I so subtly passed to you?"
     
                "You mean about duh secret passage inna
sout' corner and all?" the surly voice of Smad Bell responded.
     
                "Exactly!" the Groaci confirmed in his
accentless Terran. "Now, you scamps get going, before Ben wakes up and
realizes—"
     
                "Before I realize what?" Magnan barked
as he approached the conspirators out of the darkness.
     
                "Rats!" Shinth hissed. "The jig
is up, lads! He's on to us! It's every being for himself!"
     
                "That s'pose to be some kinda crack?"
Pool demanded. "I guess us Bloorians are still humern, even if we are mutated
a little!"
     
                "By no means, my dear Foor!" Shinth
disclaimed. "I only meant—"
     
                "Skip it, Shinth," Pool muttered.
"I guess duh point is, like, academic."
     
                "I warn you, Bell, and you, too,
Pool!" His Groaci Ex snarled. "I'm holding you personally responsible
for these outrages against my person as well as against the proud state of
Groac! I m seeing my attorneys in the morning. I've retained a prestigious
Terran firm, well equipped to sue under Terry law as well as Bloorian!"
     
                "Never mind, Jim," Magnan said to
Retief, who had come up beside him to urge him to withdraw and deal with the
matter in daylight.
     
                "I'm a close personal friend of old Mr.
Roger, at Shinth's counsel's firm, Tupp, Futter and Swive, P.A.!" Magnan
snapped. "He'll soon deal with those Johnny-come-latelies, Skinnerback and
Milkerdown, P.A.! Bob Skinnerback and Fred Milkerdown are neophytes! I, for
one, don't fear litigation!" He stamped off to take up a position at the
locked emergency exit.
     
                "Jeez!" Foor offered in a stage
whisper. "Ben's went and tooken up a position by duh secret excape route!
Now how do we get outa here?"
     
                "Right through duh odder Terry," a
youngish Bloorian barked, and the entire group charged Retief, ignoring
Shinth's faint cries of protest. Retief waited for the first volunteer and
floored him with a roundhouse swipe, catching two more with the return
backhand. The others split into two groups and advanced from right and left.
Retief ducked aside and allowed them to collide, at which point their
long-suppressed natural hostilities broke free and they instantly formed a
solid mass of combatants, each intent only on tearing his erstwhile ally limb
from limb.
     
                "Argumentative fellows," Retief
commented, as he helped three unconscious members back to their feet before
propelling them back into the free-for-all. Shinth alone had held aloof from
the melée. He hissed in distress and scuttled for the bale-blocked outer door.
Magnan took a step after him.
     
                "Let him go, Ben," Retief suggested.
"He'll be easy to find tomorrow, hiding in his chancery, making up
excuses."
     
                "What possible excuse could exist?"
Magnan demanded, "for the presence of a Groaci Chief of Mission, here in
the godown and well after business hours, in the commissary stores, in company
of these ruffians?"
     
                "None," Retief supplied. "That'll
keep him even busier."
     
                They went around the free-for-all and approached
Shinth, skulking by the well-known secret exit.
     
                "What about it, Mr. Ambassador?"
Magnan demanded. "Do we get the safe-conduct, or do you prefer public
exposure?"
     
                "Bah!" His Groacian Ex dismissed