she ran and let Mina in. To her shock, Mina’s face was wreathed in a happy smile. Mina swept her up in her arms.
“Darling, beautiful darling, we have him back!”
Galia blinked. “Mina?”
“Our boy, the only one who ever mattered worth a damn to me. He’s back, and gods below, but he’s a sight for sore eyes.”
“You saw him? You saw Strayke?” she said, her voice slightly shrill.
Mina nodded.
“That’s what I came to tell you. Apparently, he was bought by the martial arm of Tenebris’s government. He’s been fighting his way up the ranks for years. And now, here he is–” Mina held her at arm’s length. “Galia, what’s the matter?”
“You saw him? You spoke with him?”
Mina frowned at her in puzzlement. “He’s in the guards’ quarters with the rest of us. I’m sure he’ll get his own room in a while, but at the moment, he’s settling his men.”
“He…was happy to see you?”
“Picked me up, hugged the breath out of me and called me a dozen foul names,” Mina said.
Galia broke away from Mina, staring up at the ceiling. Over the last five years, she had learned to put away her tears. However, now she could feel them threatening to flow whether she wished them to or not.
“I chose you and not him,” she said, her voice small. “I chose you, and he will never forgive me for it. He couldn’t even say my name or speak it.”
Mina frowned. “No,” she said. “Look, I can bring him up here. You can speak with him–”
“ No ,” Galia nearly yelled. Shocked at her own tone, she lowered her voice. “No,” she said more quietly. “No. If he doesn’t want to see me, don’t bring him here. There is no need to inflict something painful on him.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“I wronged him, and I have always known it. He has known it too. Sometimes, I think that the only person who doesn’t know it is you.”
Mina’s dark eyes went hard.
“Are you saying that I’m too dim to know what you did for me? I do know, Galia. I know that you were put into an impossible situation by a woman who terrifies the city. If she had asked me who I would have chosen, I would have said you.”
Galia shook her head, burying her face in her hands.
“You’re just trying to find a way to forgive me. But I can’t. I made the choice, but I hate it. I hate it every day.”
“Oh darling.”
For a moment, Mina’s arms around her felt as safe and sure as the mountains themselves. But Galia couldn’t take comfort she didn’t deserve. She shook Mina off.
“Galia!”
“Don’t…just don’t.”
“Galia–”
“Please leave,” Galia murmured, her voice breaking as she turned away.
Behind her, she could hear Mina sigh, long and deep.
“I love you, Galia,” Mina said quietly.
Galia didn’t dare turn around until she heard the window creak closed. She was alone, but the terrible, ravaging pain did not go.
As she wearily stripped, climbed into bed, and curled up, she settled into that pain. When she dreamed, it was of a woman in a different place and time. Her lovers were as different as night and day, wounded but whole. It was a good dream, but an incomplete one.
Chapter 10
T he next morning dawned uncommonly gray and dreary. It was high summer in Tenebris, but sudden changes in weather could happen. Whatever its cause, it suited Galia’s mood. She allowed herself to be dressed in a beautiful silk gown of sky blue. The slippery folds draped over her like water. She pinched some of the silk between two fingers, seeing it as though for the first time. She knew it’d been brought from a far corner of the world, across empty land and mountains, only to end up adorning a slave’s body.
We don’t choose our slaveries, she thought, but some of us do better than others.
She went to find Rhea, and they finalized their plans for the bread. To Galia’s pleasant surprise, the bread deliveries could begin right away.
“You work fast,” she said to Rhea, who dimpled with
“Darling, beautiful darling, we have him back!”
Galia blinked. “Mina?”
“Our boy, the only one who ever mattered worth a damn to me. He’s back, and gods below, but he’s a sight for sore eyes.”
“You saw him? You saw Strayke?” she said, her voice slightly shrill.
Mina nodded.
“That’s what I came to tell you. Apparently, he was bought by the martial arm of Tenebris’s government. He’s been fighting his way up the ranks for years. And now, here he is–” Mina held her at arm’s length. “Galia, what’s the matter?”
“You saw him? You spoke with him?”
Mina frowned at her in puzzlement. “He’s in the guards’ quarters with the rest of us. I’m sure he’ll get his own room in a while, but at the moment, he’s settling his men.”
“He…was happy to see you?”
“Picked me up, hugged the breath out of me and called me a dozen foul names,” Mina said.
Galia broke away from Mina, staring up at the ceiling. Over the last five years, she had learned to put away her tears. However, now she could feel them threatening to flow whether she wished them to or not.
“I chose you and not him,” she said, her voice small. “I chose you, and he will never forgive me for it. He couldn’t even say my name or speak it.”
Mina frowned. “No,” she said. “Look, I can bring him up here. You can speak with him–”
“ No ,” Galia nearly yelled. Shocked at her own tone, she lowered her voice. “No,” she said more quietly. “No. If he doesn’t want to see me, don’t bring him here. There is no need to inflict something painful on him.”
“That’s ridiculous.”
“I wronged him, and I have always known it. He has known it too. Sometimes, I think that the only person who doesn’t know it is you.”
Mina’s dark eyes went hard.
“Are you saying that I’m too dim to know what you did for me? I do know, Galia. I know that you were put into an impossible situation by a woman who terrifies the city. If she had asked me who I would have chosen, I would have said you.”
Galia shook her head, burying her face in her hands.
“You’re just trying to find a way to forgive me. But I can’t. I made the choice, but I hate it. I hate it every day.”
“Oh darling.”
For a moment, Mina’s arms around her felt as safe and sure as the mountains themselves. But Galia couldn’t take comfort she didn’t deserve. She shook Mina off.
“Galia!”
“Don’t…just don’t.”
“Galia–”
“Please leave,” Galia murmured, her voice breaking as she turned away.
Behind her, she could hear Mina sigh, long and deep.
“I love you, Galia,” Mina said quietly.
Galia didn’t dare turn around until she heard the window creak closed. She was alone, but the terrible, ravaging pain did not go.
As she wearily stripped, climbed into bed, and curled up, she settled into that pain. When she dreamed, it was of a woman in a different place and time. Her lovers were as different as night and day, wounded but whole. It was a good dream, but an incomplete one.
Chapter 10
T he next morning dawned uncommonly gray and dreary. It was high summer in Tenebris, but sudden changes in weather could happen. Whatever its cause, it suited Galia’s mood. She allowed herself to be dressed in a beautiful silk gown of sky blue. The slippery folds draped over her like water. She pinched some of the silk between two fingers, seeing it as though for the first time. She knew it’d been brought from a far corner of the world, across empty land and mountains, only to end up adorning a slave’s body.
We don’t choose our slaveries, she thought, but some of us do better than others.
She went to find Rhea, and they finalized their plans for the bread. To Galia’s pleasant surprise, the bread deliveries could begin right away.
“You work fast,” she said to Rhea, who dimpled with
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