Real Vampires Have Curves

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Authors: Gerry Bartlett
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and she looked like a model. I was prepared to hate her.
    â€œSorry, Lacy, we forgot you’re a day person. Meet your new neighbor, Gloriana St. Clair. Then you can go back to bed. Glory, this is Lacy Devereau.”
    Lacy gave me the once over then swept the room, her eyes narrowing on Valdez, who’d leaped down to stand by my side. He growled and I grabbed his collar, though I knew from experience that if Valdez decided to bolt, he was gone.
    â€œBack off, fur ball. I was here first.” Lacy obviously wasn’t talking to me.
    â€œYeah? Change, lady, and we’ll see who owns this turf.”
    â€œStop it, Valdez.” I smiled and held out my other hand. “Please, forgive my, er, protector. He’s got a love-hate thing with cats.”
    â€œA hate thing that says haul your skinny ass out of here.” Valdez bared his teeth.
    Lacy laughed and shook my hand. “All bark. I’ve met his kind before. And, fur ball, you have no idea what my cat form looks like.” She purred and bent down to look into his eyes. Whatever they said to each other inside their heads seemed to settle things for the moment.
    â€œLet me go. It stinks in here. I’ll be on your bed if you need me.” Valdez looked up at me.
    â€œFine.” I released him and watched him trot toward my new room. He paused in the doorway to glance over his shoulder and growl. Lacy growled back, her nails suddenly claws, and he sniffed and walked stiff-legged out of sight.
    â€œSorry about that, Lacy.”
    â€œNot to worry, Glory. Dogs are as important to me as a flea on my backside. He bites, I scratch him right out of existence. Which is what I told him a moment ago.”
    Hmm. Interesting neighbor. Could she read my mind? She smiled and nodded. Peachy. All I needed was another one.
    â€œDamian said he’s leasing the shop downstairs to you. An antique store?”
    â€œRight. Vintage Vamp’s Emporium.”
    â€œCool. I’ve had some retail experience and”—she leaned forward—“I’m kind of an antique myself.”
    â€œYou want a job?” This was good news. I needed a day worker and, despite her rather aggressive attitude with my dog, Lacy seemed like a competent person. I looked her over. She did have a skinny butt, so I still might hate her. And her skin. Creamy and absolutely glowing despite not a speck of makeup. Shouldn’t werecats have whiskers or something?
    â€œI need a job. I was working in the coffee bar at a local bookstore when this idiot told his buddy he’d just dumped a litter of kittens on the side of the freeway. He was laughing. ” She shuddered. “Those poor babies didn’t stand a chance.”
    â€œJerk.”
    â€œExactly. So, oops, I dropped a latte in his lap.”
    â€œHot latte, I hope.” Kittens on the freeway. I can’t tolerate cruelty to animals.
    â€œYou’d better believe it. But it got me fired.”
    â€œToo bad. I’ve always been an animal lover. Why do you think I keep a dog around?”
    â€œYou should switch to cats, Glory. Much more interesting. Not so slavishly devoted, of course.”
    Time for a subject change. “Where are Freddy and Derek?” Not that it mattered. The U-Haul was empty and we’d already arranged for one of Derek’s mortal friends to turn it in tomorrow.
    â€œThey hit it as soon as they introduced us. Probably bringing down their prey as we speak. Maybe you should join them while you’ve still got darkness.” Lacy yawned and stretched. Yes, she did have a kind of cat persona going on.
    â€œWe don’t call it prey. And I haven’t fed that way in years.” Obviously vamps and werecats have a different mind-set.
    â€œToo bad.” Lacy looked around the room. “So how about that job? I could use the money and I do know a thing or two about old stuff.” She walked over to the pile of clothes Freddy had dropped onto a

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