said Queenie, continuing to spoon peas onto her plate, "and I've never lived by myself before. That old house...it's filled withjtoo many memories. Too many people have lived there. Too many people have died there. And I don't think I can stay in it by myself."
"Well, Queenie," said Grace quickly, "you know you're welcome out here, but I don't think you'd be happy."
Queenie shook her head. "I miss the excitement of town," she admitted. "But Miriam won't have me, Elinor doesn't have the room, and I'm too old to think of moving anywhere else. Besides, James left me that house. He left me everything in it—his things, his pretty things that he loved so much. And I owe it to him—I owe everything to your daddy, Grace—to stay there and watch over them. I'd never forgive myself if I didn't go back... but I'm so scared."
"I don't understand," said Tommy Lee. "I don't understand what you're scared of."
"I hear things," said Queenie. She smiled, but the smile was pained. "I see lights, Tommy Lee. I know, you think I'm just an old scairdy-cat woman—hearing things that aren't there, seeing things that don't exist. I know they're not there. I know they don't exist. But I still hear them, and I still see them. The night before I came out here, do you know what I saw when I looked out the window in the middle of the night?"
"What?" said Tommy Lee.
"Lucille," said Queenie, turning away from the boy and toward his mother. "I saw your daddy walking right across the yard. Your daddy came up on the front porch of that house and tried to get in. I heard his boots on the porch. He tried to raise the window, but I had it latched. He tried to open the door, but I had it locked. When he couldn't get in, he got mad, and he made all the lights come on and he broke every bulb and every light in the house. There wasn't any electrical storm. The wiring in that house was fine. Carl Strickland did it. He's mad 'cause when he drowned in the Perdido I took Ivey's quarters and I threw them in the water and those quarters kept him down."
"Mama," said Lucille softly. "Daddy's dead. Daddy's been dead for thirty years."
"I know," said Queenie. "But don't you think I'd still know him if I heard him walking up and down on the front porch? Don't you think I'd know him if I saw him? He was walking back toward the levee. He was going back into the Perdido. Those quarters kept him down, I know they did. Oh, Lord, I wish I had 'em back! I wish I had kept 'em in my pocket! If I go back, I know he'll be on the front porch again at night. When I heard the dishes rattle at night, I knew that was Carl, out on the front porch, rocking in a chair—Lucille, you remember how your daddy always used to sit out on the porch at night and rock. But then he gets up, and walks up and down the porch, looking for a way to get in the house. How can I go back?"
Lucille and Grace said nothing.
"Grandmama?" said Tommy Lee.
"What?"
"What if I went with you?"
Queenie considered this.
"I'd feel protected," she said at last. "Carl didn't come when Malcolm was in the house. It was only when Malcolm got married and moved next door."
"Then I'll go back with you. We can leave tonight. I'll drive you back."
Queenie shook her head. "And then tomorrow you'll come back here. Carl will just be waiting for you to go. It won't do any good."
"But what if I stayed?"
"Stayed?" echoed Grace.
Tommy Lee nodded.
Queenie smiled, then reached over and squeezed Tommy Lee's hand. "You're sweet, but you love this boring old farm. I know how you love it."
Tommy Lee shrugged. "I tell you what," he said. "If Mama and Grace will let me, I'll come stay with you till you feel safe again."
"What about your hunting?" said Grace.
"There's woods right up against Elinor's house. I hunted there with Malcolm one time."
"What about fishing?" said his mother.
"There's the Perdido. It's about as close as you can get."
"You'd leave us?" said Lucille, shaking her head in disbelief.
"Grandmama needs me,"
"Well, Queenie," said Grace quickly, "you know you're welcome out here, but I don't think you'd be happy."
Queenie shook her head. "I miss the excitement of town," she admitted. "But Miriam won't have me, Elinor doesn't have the room, and I'm too old to think of moving anywhere else. Besides, James left me that house. He left me everything in it—his things, his pretty things that he loved so much. And I owe it to him—I owe everything to your daddy, Grace—to stay there and watch over them. I'd never forgive myself if I didn't go back... but I'm so scared."
"I don't understand," said Tommy Lee. "I don't understand what you're scared of."
"I hear things," said Queenie. She smiled, but the smile was pained. "I see lights, Tommy Lee. I know, you think I'm just an old scairdy-cat woman—hearing things that aren't there, seeing things that don't exist. I know they're not there. I know they don't exist. But I still hear them, and I still see them. The night before I came out here, do you know what I saw when I looked out the window in the middle of the night?"
"What?" said Tommy Lee.
"Lucille," said Queenie, turning away from the boy and toward his mother. "I saw your daddy walking right across the yard. Your daddy came up on the front porch of that house and tried to get in. I heard his boots on the porch. He tried to raise the window, but I had it latched. He tried to open the door, but I had it locked. When he couldn't get in, he got mad, and he made all the lights come on and he broke every bulb and every light in the house. There wasn't any electrical storm. The wiring in that house was fine. Carl Strickland did it. He's mad 'cause when he drowned in the Perdido I took Ivey's quarters and I threw them in the water and those quarters kept him down."
"Mama," said Lucille softly. "Daddy's dead. Daddy's been dead for thirty years."
"I know," said Queenie. "But don't you think I'd still know him if I heard him walking up and down on the front porch? Don't you think I'd know him if I saw him? He was walking back toward the levee. He was going back into the Perdido. Those quarters kept him down, I know they did. Oh, Lord, I wish I had 'em back! I wish I had kept 'em in my pocket! If I go back, I know he'll be on the front porch again at night. When I heard the dishes rattle at night, I knew that was Carl, out on the front porch, rocking in a chair—Lucille, you remember how your daddy always used to sit out on the porch at night and rock. But then he gets up, and walks up and down the porch, looking for a way to get in the house. How can I go back?"
Lucille and Grace said nothing.
"Grandmama?" said Tommy Lee.
"What?"
"What if I went with you?"
Queenie considered this.
"I'd feel protected," she said at last. "Carl didn't come when Malcolm was in the house. It was only when Malcolm got married and moved next door."
"Then I'll go back with you. We can leave tonight. I'll drive you back."
Queenie shook her head. "And then tomorrow you'll come back here. Carl will just be waiting for you to go. It won't do any good."
"But what if I stayed?"
"Stayed?" echoed Grace.
Tommy Lee nodded.
Queenie smiled, then reached over and squeezed Tommy Lee's hand. "You're sweet, but you love this boring old farm. I know how you love it."
Tommy Lee shrugged. "I tell you what," he said. "If Mama and Grace will let me, I'll come stay with you till you feel safe again."
"What about your hunting?" said Grace.
"There's woods right up against Elinor's house. I hunted there with Malcolm one time."
"What about fishing?" said his mother.
"There's the Perdido. It's about as close as you can get."
"You'd leave us?" said Lucille, shaking her head in disbelief.
"Grandmama needs me,"
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