me to come to him; I could see that my tears caused him pain. I leaned into his arms and he wrapped them around me without hesitation.
I relaxed in his embrace for a moment, the warmth of his arms provided instant comfort.
He leaned down to press his cheek against my temple. “It’s more than just feelings, Nina. You have to know that.”
I peered up at him with damp eyes. “Then why haven’t you…?”
“What?” he asked. I shook my head at first, but he pulled me closer to him and his eyes begged me to confess my thoughts. “Tell me.”
“Why haven’t you tried to kiss me?”
He seemed stunned, and then his eyes settled on my lips. I watched as his expression changed from desire, to conflicted, to a decision. I didn’t know what it all meant, so I closed my eyes and leaned into him, knowing his lips were just a few inches from mine. I felt his grip tighten and he held me at bay. My eyes popped open, humiliation crashing over me in waves. Adding to my already crippling embarrassment, tears once again spilled over my cheeks.
His eyes closed tight and his face crumpled. “I don’t want to lie to you.”
The humiliation still flamed my face, but it was now obscured by my anger. I’d grown weary of his vague non-answers. He would offer a tiny bit of truth shrouded in confusing ambiguity and my patience had reached its limit.
Seeing the resentment in my eyes, Jared let out a frustrated sigh. He released me and walked across the street to an impressive black motorcycle parked behind the bench. Without looking back he turned the key, and with a push of the button the engine roared to life. The motor snarled as he revved it a few times before speeding off the sidewalk and down the street.
The weekend came and went. Beth and I attended the basketball game and Kim, Beth and I joined Ryan, Josh, Tucker, and Chad for air hockey and nachos. I refused to talk about Jared, even with Beth. I couldn’t even bring myself to explain what had happened that caused me to be so furious anytime they mentioned his name.
Ryan seemed to enjoy my change of heart. One night he called to ask me for help with his chemistry, and we found ourselves sitting on the floor of my dorm room alone.
“No…it’s….” I pressed my lips together as I rewrote the last line.
“Chad said he failed this test last year,” Ryan grumbled.
“Well, Chad didn’t have me for a tutor, now did he?” I threw my pencil at him and it bounced to the floor.
“Tutor or not, this test is gonna suck.”
“Have you lost your faith in me?”
“Have you reconsidered my offer, yet?” he grinned.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I shrugged, playing dumb.
“Yes, you do. It’s okay if you haven’t….you will eventually,” he smiled wide.
“I’m fairly certain I won’t be interested in dating for a long, long time.”
Ryan didn’t skip a beat. “I’ll wait.”
Chapter Four
The Ring
The next weeks proved to be fairly mundane. I hadn’t seen Jared or Mr. Dawson, and Ryan’s propositions had tapered off. Beth had been noticeably absent from our room. I hadn’t even been sequestered for a ballgame.
I didn’t leave campus for further theory-testing walks, and I tried not to venture off campus in general. My feelings were conflicted at any given second between being desperate to see Jared again and cringing at thoughts of any chance run-ins. I committed to pushing him from my mind, even if I had to do it a thousand times a day.
At study group, Ryan and I took our normal spots to work together on his latest academic crisis. Kim passed the time by shooting rubber bands at Josh while Beth and the new girl, Nicole, compared notes.
Josh caught one of Kim’s rubber missiles in mid-air and yawned. “So, when are we going out again?”
Kim shrugged. “I don’t know. When do you want to go?”
“I don’t think Nina’s up to it,” Beth hinted. The entire group stared at me with a mixture of pitiful and
I relaxed in his embrace for a moment, the warmth of his arms provided instant comfort.
He leaned down to press his cheek against my temple. “It’s more than just feelings, Nina. You have to know that.”
I peered up at him with damp eyes. “Then why haven’t you…?”
“What?” he asked. I shook my head at first, but he pulled me closer to him and his eyes begged me to confess my thoughts. “Tell me.”
“Why haven’t you tried to kiss me?”
He seemed stunned, and then his eyes settled on my lips. I watched as his expression changed from desire, to conflicted, to a decision. I didn’t know what it all meant, so I closed my eyes and leaned into him, knowing his lips were just a few inches from mine. I felt his grip tighten and he held me at bay. My eyes popped open, humiliation crashing over me in waves. Adding to my already crippling embarrassment, tears once again spilled over my cheeks.
His eyes closed tight and his face crumpled. “I don’t want to lie to you.”
The humiliation still flamed my face, but it was now obscured by my anger. I’d grown weary of his vague non-answers. He would offer a tiny bit of truth shrouded in confusing ambiguity and my patience had reached its limit.
Seeing the resentment in my eyes, Jared let out a frustrated sigh. He released me and walked across the street to an impressive black motorcycle parked behind the bench. Without looking back he turned the key, and with a push of the button the engine roared to life. The motor snarled as he revved it a few times before speeding off the sidewalk and down the street.
The weekend came and went. Beth and I attended the basketball game and Kim, Beth and I joined Ryan, Josh, Tucker, and Chad for air hockey and nachos. I refused to talk about Jared, even with Beth. I couldn’t even bring myself to explain what had happened that caused me to be so furious anytime they mentioned his name.
Ryan seemed to enjoy my change of heart. One night he called to ask me for help with his chemistry, and we found ourselves sitting on the floor of my dorm room alone.
“No…it’s….” I pressed my lips together as I rewrote the last line.
“Chad said he failed this test last year,” Ryan grumbled.
“Well, Chad didn’t have me for a tutor, now did he?” I threw my pencil at him and it bounced to the floor.
“Tutor or not, this test is gonna suck.”
“Have you lost your faith in me?”
“Have you reconsidered my offer, yet?” he grinned.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I shrugged, playing dumb.
“Yes, you do. It’s okay if you haven’t….you will eventually,” he smiled wide.
“I’m fairly certain I won’t be interested in dating for a long, long time.”
Ryan didn’t skip a beat. “I’ll wait.”
Chapter Four
The Ring
The next weeks proved to be fairly mundane. I hadn’t seen Jared or Mr. Dawson, and Ryan’s propositions had tapered off. Beth had been noticeably absent from our room. I hadn’t even been sequestered for a ballgame.
I didn’t leave campus for further theory-testing walks, and I tried not to venture off campus in general. My feelings were conflicted at any given second between being desperate to see Jared again and cringing at thoughts of any chance run-ins. I committed to pushing him from my mind, even if I had to do it a thousand times a day.
At study group, Ryan and I took our normal spots to work together on his latest academic crisis. Kim passed the time by shooting rubber bands at Josh while Beth and the new girl, Nicole, compared notes.
Josh caught one of Kim’s rubber missiles in mid-air and yawned. “So, when are we going out again?”
Kim shrugged. “I don’t know. When do you want to go?”
“I don’t think Nina’s up to it,” Beth hinted. The entire group stared at me with a mixture of pitiful and
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