survivor we needed a volunteer. No one wanted to do it. They had started pretty decent lives, found new lovers, jobs, and a couple started families. They wanted those back, they wanted what they had earned. But Thom Crisp must’ve wanted that. She came as soon as he called.”
We watched as Alice and Thom embraced once more, and then laughed at how silly they were being not staying in each other’s arms. It was time to stop being a spectator.
“See that she gets home at a decent hour,” I told Gentry on my way out.
“I thought maybe you would want to stay?”
I couldn’t believe that what I said could erase the years of Gentry’s debauchery and arrogance. That a person could change with a single thought, a single desire to be his old self. But to be honest, I had no desire for him. Not even when he was the kind young man who took me in and patched me up. I had one thing on my mind then. And seeing those boyish eyes of his return and beg me to stay as they had all those years ago brought back that singular thought again.
I still wanted to kill the Dessup Gang. Every last one of them.
I wished I could shake that desire. I wished I could want what Alice and Thom had. But that had been taken from me. Maybe I would want those things one day. But for right now, I’ll take Old Shepard home. Get Gregor to fix him up, and in the meantime I’ll be at Macy’s. As I always am. Trying not to give into my one desire. Trying to move on.
That’s what everyone says would be best for me.
“You take care of yourself, Kimberly,” Gentry said, escorting me to the lift. A couple of Colonials saluted me like I had done something. But I hadn’t killed the Dessup Gang this time. I had just helped Colonial protect its best interests. Helped Lord Gentry continue fooling the known galaxies with his grace and compassion. Probably helped Alice get laid. That was worth a salute.
I realized I was as much of a fraud as Gentry.
I turned to face him as I stepped into the lift. There was something I could’ve said, maybe even should’ve said. But it escaped me. The lift closed and I made my way to the border of Earthside, grateful to be going.
Gregor picked me up outside of Earthside. He went right into lecture mode.
“ Kimmie, always a mess with you.”
But I gave him pause as he saw the cage in my hand. Inside the jhornosp licks its razor sharp teeth, seemingly taking my side of the argument.
“What is that for?” Gregor asked as I put it in the back seat of his ride.
“Someone was trying to illegally import the poor bugger. Colonials dropped some of the charges if I agreed to relase it back into the wild.”
“You’re not going to release it, right? We’ll squash it.”
I crawled into the passenger seat and didn’t answer. Maybe there was mercy in me, maybe I was the disgusting little jhornosp that no one wanted.
I let Gregor lecture me for the duration of the trip. It wasn’t all that bad considering the alternative could’ve been me behind bars, stuck forever in Earthside.
No. This was a happy ending. I guess deep down I just didn’t really want it. Not when it seemed like I’d just go on, messing things up, like saying the sun set in the west, when I know it doesn’t here. I’d been lying to myself thinking I could just go on, just trying to pretend there was something else in my life that I wanted more. But there was nothing else I wanted.
When I got back to my shack, I loaded up Old Shepard and drove out to Bill Pace’s place. He wouldn’t be too excited to see me again. But I had business for him this time and he had weapons, lots of them. I was done being a prisoner. I was the jhornosp, ready to prepare my final supper.
Ready to meet the horizon.
THE END…
KIMMIE STRYDER WILL RETURN IN….
<>
SMASH
&
BURN SIDE
STYDER’S HORIZON #3
<>
Stryder’s path to vengeance leads her into a dangerous derby that will test more than just her ability to survive.
Coming
Sherryl Woods
Thant Myint-U
Jessica Wood
Vella Day
Loretta Chase
Stuart Gibbs
Gary Paulsen
Rae Katherine Eighmey
Gretchen Lane
Brair Lake