got this, danke .”
As she approached the table to begin unloading the goods from the boxes, she noticed that Harvey made no move toward the door. His presence did not disturb her, however. There was something comforting about him.
“It can’t be easy,” he finally said, breaking the silence. “For you or for them.”
“Them?” His words surprised her, and she didn’t know to whom he was referring. “The paparazzi?”
He chuckled and shook his head. “The Amish in your community.”
“Ah,” she replied wistfully, not certain that she wanted to agree with him, although knowing that he spoke the truth.
“They cannot understand your choice, I reckon,” he continued. “And you probably cannot understand their harsh determination in dealing with it.”
Harsh determination? She wanted to laugh at his choice of words. Harsh, indeed! She felt unwanted and betrayed by the very people among whom she had been raised. She had not realized that she could be treated in such a manner, especially since she had never taken her baptism. They were unofficially shunning her without officially admitting it. Yet Amanda knew that she couldn’t abandon her family, not after all they had been through.
Oh, she knew that there was no home for her among the Amish. Not anymore. Her love for Alejandro transcended her desire to remain plain. And she knew better than to pressure him to consider such a move. She had made the decision to leave her family and her community for Alejandro. And now that they were married, she hadn’t once regretted that decision. Still, the rejection she had felt during that shopping excursion stung at her soul. How could her own people be so cold?
“I reckon I can pray about it,” Amanda finally admitted. “Mayhaps then I can gain some understanding.” Forcing a smile, she took the empty box and set it on the floor before tackling the second one. “What does the book of Proverbs say? All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes; but the Lord weigheth the spirits. ”
Harvey reached down for the empty box. “The self-righteous heart can justify just about anything, ain’t so?”
She wondered if he was directing that comment to her or toward the people of her g’may but decided not to ask. Either way, he spoke the truth. She had never considered herself self-righteous and could only presume that he meant the g’may . “I am not above correction or conscience,” she said softly.
“I did not mean you,” he confirmed, reaching his hand out for the second box. “Your actions speak of a contrite and honest heart, Amanda. Of the others, however, I am not so sure.”
Amanda stared after him as he carried both of the empty boxes toward the door. He paused, just briefly, before he disappeared outside. She stared after him, his words haunting her.
Indeed, he had been speaking of the Amish, the people of her g’may . How could she have been so blind to the prejudices of her own community for all of those years? Despite the peace and tranquility of her youth, she was seeing things differently now. Where she used to see colors, so bright and vibrant, she was now seeing things in black and white. Her mind seemed flooded with conflicting information; it pulled her even further away from her upbringing.
Could it be true? Could the prejudices of the bishop and the lack of compassion of the people show a communally lofty heart? One that countered all of the teaching and preaching in school, church, and home? The idea was shocking to her, and she stood there, stunned, as the thoughts raced through her head.
She appreciated Harvey’s insight. As a Mennonite, he was close enough to the Amish community to be knowledgeable about their ways, yet he provided an outside perspective that she had never bothered to seek. Was that what the Englische thought about the Amish? That they abandoned those who left the fold? That their hearts did not reflect the truth behind the spoken word?
“No!”
The sound of
As she approached the table to begin unloading the goods from the boxes, she noticed that Harvey made no move toward the door. His presence did not disturb her, however. There was something comforting about him.
“It can’t be easy,” he finally said, breaking the silence. “For you or for them.”
“Them?” His words surprised her, and she didn’t know to whom he was referring. “The paparazzi?”
He chuckled and shook his head. “The Amish in your community.”
“Ah,” she replied wistfully, not certain that she wanted to agree with him, although knowing that he spoke the truth.
“They cannot understand your choice, I reckon,” he continued. “And you probably cannot understand their harsh determination in dealing with it.”
Harsh determination? She wanted to laugh at his choice of words. Harsh, indeed! She felt unwanted and betrayed by the very people among whom she had been raised. She had not realized that she could be treated in such a manner, especially since she had never taken her baptism. They were unofficially shunning her without officially admitting it. Yet Amanda knew that she couldn’t abandon her family, not after all they had been through.
Oh, she knew that there was no home for her among the Amish. Not anymore. Her love for Alejandro transcended her desire to remain plain. And she knew better than to pressure him to consider such a move. She had made the decision to leave her family and her community for Alejandro. And now that they were married, she hadn’t once regretted that decision. Still, the rejection she had felt during that shopping excursion stung at her soul. How could her own people be so cold?
“I reckon I can pray about it,” Amanda finally admitted. “Mayhaps then I can gain some understanding.” Forcing a smile, she took the empty box and set it on the floor before tackling the second one. “What does the book of Proverbs say? All the ways of a man are clean in his own eyes; but the Lord weigheth the spirits. ”
Harvey reached down for the empty box. “The self-righteous heart can justify just about anything, ain’t so?”
She wondered if he was directing that comment to her or toward the people of her g’may but decided not to ask. Either way, he spoke the truth. She had never considered herself self-righteous and could only presume that he meant the g’may . “I am not above correction or conscience,” she said softly.
“I did not mean you,” he confirmed, reaching his hand out for the second box. “Your actions speak of a contrite and honest heart, Amanda. Of the others, however, I am not so sure.”
Amanda stared after him as he carried both of the empty boxes toward the door. He paused, just briefly, before he disappeared outside. She stared after him, his words haunting her.
Indeed, he had been speaking of the Amish, the people of her g’may . How could she have been so blind to the prejudices of her own community for all of those years? Despite the peace and tranquility of her youth, she was seeing things differently now. Where she used to see colors, so bright and vibrant, she was now seeing things in black and white. Her mind seemed flooded with conflicting information; it pulled her even further away from her upbringing.
Could it be true? Could the prejudices of the bishop and the lack of compassion of the people show a communally lofty heart? One that countered all of the teaching and preaching in school, church, and home? The idea was shocking to her, and she stood there, stunned, as the thoughts raced through her head.
She appreciated Harvey’s insight. As a Mennonite, he was close enough to the Amish community to be knowledgeable about their ways, yet he provided an outside perspective that she had never bothered to seek. Was that what the Englische thought about the Amish? That they abandoned those who left the fold? That their hearts did not reflect the truth behind the spoken word?
“No!”
The sound of
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