Read Online On a Clear Day by Anne Doughty - Free Book Online Page B

of his brothers. For the first time, she saw that the way she had gone on caring for them as they grew up meant that they now simply expected her to do as she had always done. They left a trail of things lying around wherever they went, never did a hand’s turn for themselves and, worst of all, never even thought of doing anything for anyone else.
    And Jimmy, for all his good-nature, had dropped into bad habits. There was so much he couldn’t do because of his back that he often didn’t do anything at all. He never even seemed to notice when she was tired or harassed as he’d once done. He’d taken to sitting by the fire in the small back living room reading his newspaper and looking out the window at the abandoned garden which once had been his pride and joy. As often as not Eddie was there too, a pile of magazines by his chair. She had never yet seen him bend to pickthem up when she came into the room to pull the table out for a meal. He never even moved to help her when she opened up the settee at night and tramped back upstairs to carry down the heavy pile of bedding which had to be stored in a corner of Ronnie’s room during the day.
    The hardest part for Polly was that she knew it was her own fault. Long ago, in the letters she had written so faithfully to her, week by week, when she was in Canada, Ellie had said that she did too much for the boys. Ellie had been right. It was one thing doing your best for your family but she should have made them do more for themselves and more to help her, especially when she was working as well. Now Davy and Eddie would be looking for a wife who would do just what she had done and wait on them hand and foot.
    With no help from anyone except Ronnie, the struggle to keep the place decent was a daily battle and now, on top of everything, she began to suffer hot flushes both day and night. Often she got little sleep. Weary of lying in the dark trying not to twist and turn and wake Jimmy, she’d get up and clean the kitchen or do the ironing. Sometimes she would even go upstairs to the tiny third bedroom that overlooked the road and hand finish a hem by the light of the lamp built-in to her electric sewing machine.
    With her husband and sons asleep all aroundher, she often felt quite desolate. Those were the times she always sought comfort by thinking of Ellie, wondering when they could manage to see each other again, making some plan to save a few shillings each week so she could afford the train fare to Armagh.
    Sometimes Ellie rang her from the phone booth in the Post Office.
    ‘It’s me, your little sister,’ she would say, laughing. ‘How are you, Polly? I’ve only got four pence worth. Tell me quick.’
    Ellie could only ever afford three minutes, but the sound of her laughter would brighten Polly’s life for days. Her laughter, like her sweet smile, made you feel the world was a wonderful place to live in.
    Whether it was the hardship of the war, or the cheerlessness of the months that followed, Polly didn’t know, but it seemed that her customers too were all through themselves. Certainly they had never been so hard to please. However much work she put in, however quickly she had a garment ready for fitting, they were never satisfied. They complained about the prices she charged though they were unexceptional. They insisted they wanted their item ready tomorrow. Some of them came so early for fittings that she had to keep the sitting room permanently tidy. That way there was somewhere for them to wait while she dealt withthe client left standing in Ronnie’s room in front of the wardrobe with the full length mirror.
    Some customers didn’t show up at all. Then they rang and wanted to come when she was already booked up. Some even arrived when she was out shopping and rang later to complain. Where was she, they had come and she was out. How did she expect to keep customers if she was never there?
    There were days when the phone never stopped ringing and she was up