tickling my ear and still causing my eyes to slip
shut.
My crushes on Luke
were something I’d endured on and off for longer than I liked to admit, but the
closest I’d ever been to him was when we’d wrestled each other to the floor
when we were younger than ten.
This was something
else entirely and my heart pounded against my chest with a desperate longing.
I’d dreamt about this moment for so long, even when we were being absolute
dicks to each other during the day time.
Of course it was
when he was going out with my best friend that some attraction would rear its
ugly head.
And I hadn’t even
been the one to initiate this. At least, I didn’t think I was.
Luke was gone,
disappeared into the car by the time I pulled myself back into an even slightly
normal mind-set and I slipped into the passenger seat with a stony expression.
This was the end
of even an amicable friendship. It had lasted surprisingly long.
The drive was in
silence and I knew Luke was going to drop me back off at home rather than
taking me to his like the past few nights. Maybe I had missed that he’d started
finding me attractive somewhere in that time, or maybe it had just been a
completely spur of the moment thing. At least spur of the moment would mean it
was unlikely to happen again. And that was definitely best.
For Phoebe’s sake.
Because I wasn’t
even going to be able to look at her for days. Sure, I’d daydreamed about being
with Luke whilst he’d been with Phoebe, I’d even imagined him cheating on her
with me, but if it happened in real life? That would be unbearable and I’d be
the biggest bitch in the world. She was my best friend.
“My dad had a drug
problem,” Luke spoke when we were five minutes away from my house. “It was part
of the reason his debts were so high. My mum had known about it for years and
never said anything, I think she might have been scared of him. Being there
today, it just made me all stressed out. I’m sorry for being an idiot. I’d
really rather you didn’t mention any of this to Phoebe.”
It was a formal
apology, at least in the words, but his tone quivered. Being in that house and
seeing everything going on must have really messed with him and it was no
wonder his emotions had been all over the place.
It wasn’t
attraction, it was some kind of trauma.
At least that
stopped me having to over think it and lead myself into a delusional thought
process anymore. That solved that easy enough.
“It’s fine. I
won’t say anything. I hope you’re all right. I wouldn’t have asked you to come
if I’d have known, about you or my dad.”
He didn’t respond
and I hadn’t been expecting him to. We said our goodbyes in an awkward fashion
and I disappeared into the house with a heavy heart.
I’d no doubt spend
the rest of the evening imaging all the possible outcomes if we’d actually
locked lips rather than feeling guilty about lying to my best friend again.
Chapter Seven
My mood was still
sour from witnessing Luke and Phoebe all over each other at lunch, even if it
was unreasonable and unfair. Of course they were all over each other, they were
in a relationship. I was the outlier in this situation. Luke didn’t care about
me and I shouldn’t care about him.
It made work
incredibly difficult because trying to keep a smile on my face was becoming
harder and harder. Luckily, Luke was feeling quiet so there was no need for me
to make rubbish small talk. I simply took orders and shovelled chips and
loathed my hairnet.
“You know my grade
actually went up to a B last test,” Luke commented out of the blue near the end
of our shift. “I thought you’d enjoy some ego-stroking.”
I smiled to
myself. There was nothing like it to lift my mood a little bit. “I’m glad to
hear it. I always knew I was a good teacher.”
“You feeling okay
today? You’ve been a bit down, I think.”
I
shut.
My crushes on Luke
were something I’d endured on and off for longer than I liked to admit, but the
closest I’d ever been to him was when we’d wrestled each other to the floor
when we were younger than ten.
This was something
else entirely and my heart pounded against my chest with a desperate longing.
I’d dreamt about this moment for so long, even when we were being absolute
dicks to each other during the day time.
Of course it was
when he was going out with my best friend that some attraction would rear its
ugly head.
And I hadn’t even
been the one to initiate this. At least, I didn’t think I was.
Luke was gone,
disappeared into the car by the time I pulled myself back into an even slightly
normal mind-set and I slipped into the passenger seat with a stony expression.
This was the end
of even an amicable friendship. It had lasted surprisingly long.
The drive was in
silence and I knew Luke was going to drop me back off at home rather than
taking me to his like the past few nights. Maybe I had missed that he’d started
finding me attractive somewhere in that time, or maybe it had just been a
completely spur of the moment thing. At least spur of the moment would mean it
was unlikely to happen again. And that was definitely best.
For Phoebe’s sake.
Because I wasn’t
even going to be able to look at her for days. Sure, I’d daydreamed about being
with Luke whilst he’d been with Phoebe, I’d even imagined him cheating on her
with me, but if it happened in real life? That would be unbearable and I’d be
the biggest bitch in the world. She was my best friend.
“My dad had a drug
problem,” Luke spoke when we were five minutes away from my house. “It was part
of the reason his debts were so high. My mum had known about it for years and
never said anything, I think she might have been scared of him. Being there
today, it just made me all stressed out. I’m sorry for being an idiot. I’d
really rather you didn’t mention any of this to Phoebe.”
It was a formal
apology, at least in the words, but his tone quivered. Being in that house and
seeing everything going on must have really messed with him and it was no
wonder his emotions had been all over the place.
It wasn’t
attraction, it was some kind of trauma.
At least that
stopped me having to over think it and lead myself into a delusional thought
process anymore. That solved that easy enough.
“It’s fine. I
won’t say anything. I hope you’re all right. I wouldn’t have asked you to come
if I’d have known, about you or my dad.”
He didn’t respond
and I hadn’t been expecting him to. We said our goodbyes in an awkward fashion
and I disappeared into the house with a heavy heart.
I’d no doubt spend
the rest of the evening imaging all the possible outcomes if we’d actually
locked lips rather than feeling guilty about lying to my best friend again.
Chapter Seven
My mood was still
sour from witnessing Luke and Phoebe all over each other at lunch, even if it
was unreasonable and unfair. Of course they were all over each other, they were
in a relationship. I was the outlier in this situation. Luke didn’t care about
me and I shouldn’t care about him.
It made work
incredibly difficult because trying to keep a smile on my face was becoming
harder and harder. Luckily, Luke was feeling quiet so there was no need for me
to make rubbish small talk. I simply took orders and shovelled chips and
loathed my hairnet.
“You know my grade
actually went up to a B last test,” Luke commented out of the blue near the end
of our shift. “I thought you’d enjoy some ego-stroking.”
I smiled to
myself. There was nothing like it to lift my mood a little bit. “I’m glad to
hear it. I always knew I was a good teacher.”
“You feeling okay
today? You’ve been a bit down, I think.”
I
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