Read Online Not Pretty Enough by Jaimie Admans - Free Book Online Page B

which.
    “Hi,” I mumble.
    I turn around and stare straight
ahead, pretty much frozen to the spot.
    Debs winks at me and nudges me
with her elbow.
    “I can’t,” I whisper.
    It’s true. I cannot pluck up the
courage to speak to him, even though he’s sitting mere feet away, and he’s not
surrounded by a gang of boys like he usually is.
    I look terrible today. My thighs
feel fatter than normal, my face feels spottier than normal, and my
glow-in-the-dark pale legs are on show because we’re stuck wearing our gym kits
all day, even if we have no intention of working up a sweat. My hair is frizzy
from the heat, and I know that I have a particularly huge zit on the side of my
nose.
    Debs nudges me again.
    I turn around and smile
awkwardly at Lloyd. “Congratulations,” I stammer. “You were good out there.”
    “Thanks,” he says with a smile.
    Then he does something
unexpected. He scoots closer to us.
    He actually voluntarily moved
across the grass for the sole purpose of sitting closer to me.
    “That was tough going. I really
thought Darren was going to beat me.”
    “We were rooting for you,” Debs
says.
    “Cheers.”
    If he thinks we’re insane
stalkers he doesn’t show it.
    “So, what else are you competing
in today?” I ask as casually as I can when I’m nearly hyperventilating from
this close proximity. As if I don’t know perfectly well what he’s competing in.
    “Oh, everything,” he says,
smiling again. “I love sports day.”
    I’m glad he told me because I
would never have known otherwise.
    “Well, I’m sure you’ll do
great.”
    “What are you two doing?”
    “As little as possible,” I say.
“I’m doing the javelin and the long jump.” But please
don’t come and watch the long jump because my boobs will probably escape from
my bra and hit me in the eye .
    Now I come to think of it, maybe
long jump isn’t such a good idea if you’re anything over an A cup. Oh well. I
want Lloyd to be around when I have to throw my javelin, but I really hope he’s
caught up in his own event when I have to do the long jump.
    I have no idea what to say to
him. I don’t want him to get up and leave, I want him to stay and talk to us,
but I have no idea what to say. There is nothing remotely clever or witty
inside my head. Debs must sense it, because she says, “So, what’s next?”
    “The four hundred metre race,”
Lloyd replies. “We’ve got half an hour to recover from this one, then we get to
do it all over again for twice the distance.”
    “Sounds like fun,” I say.
    “I tell you what, I will be so
impressed by whoever wins this one.”
    “Don’t you think it will be
you?”
    “Not a chance. Darren nearly
beat me just now and that was only two hundred metres. This one is gonna kill
me. Whoever can run four hundred metres will get my respect for life.”
    Talk about handing it to me on a
plate.
    I will be so impressed with
whoever wins this one.
    … Will get my respect for life.
    I know what I have to do.
    I have to win the four hundred
metre race.
    Ewan comes back and plops down
on the grass next to Lloyd.
    “Oh good, I was waiting for
you,” Lloyd says.
    Suddenly I feel disappointed. I
thought he might’ve come over here just to see me. He scooted closer and
everything. I thought he might have actually wanted to talk to me.
    “Good luck with your events.”
Lloyd looks me directly in the eyes as they both get up and go to leave. “See
you around.”
    “We’ll be cheering for you,”
Debs says, waving as he walks away.
    The disappointment gives way to
excitement. I’m going to win Lloyd’s admiration. Soon enough he will come to
sit by me because he actually wants to sit by me.
    “Wait here,” I say to Debs, and
I get up and jog down to Mr Hursh.
    “I’d like to add my name to the
sign-ups for the four hundred metres,” I say.
    “Fine.” He hands me the
clipboard.
    I scribble my name on the form.
    “You’re in the second group.” He
looks me up and down