Read Online Nobody's Fool by Richard Russo - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Richard Russo
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sure any of them would make sense to Cass. For one thing, if he worked at Hatrie's he wouldn't be able to wander in off the street when he felt like it because he'd already be there. And he much preferred the side of the counter he was on to the side Cass was on.
"You don't need me, for one thing," he pointed out.
"Roof's talking about moving back to North CCarlina," she said without looking at the cook, who had taken a stool around the other side of the counter to enjoy the lull and was studying them.
"And has been for twenty years," Sully reminded her.
"I think he means it."
"He's meant it all along. Half the town's been meaning to leave. They don't, though, most of them."
"I know one person who's going to," Cass said, and she sounded like she meant it.
"The day after the funeral."
They both glanced at old Hatrie, who was leaning forward intently and grinning, as if she were in an arm-wrestling match with Death himself, an opponent she was confident of whipping.
"Maybe the day before."
Something of the desperation in her voice got through to Sully, who said, "Listen. You want to get out some night, let me know. I'll baby-sit." Cass smiled dubiously.
"And where would I go?"
Sully shrugged.
"How the hell should I know? A movie? I can't figure out everything for you." Cass smiled, didn't say anything immediately.
"I should take you up on it. Just to find out what you'd do when she wet her pants and asked you to change her." Sully tried to suppress a shudder and failed.
NOBODY'S FOOL 3
"Right." Cass nodded knowingly.
"I better go shovel my landlady out," he said.
"How'd this town get so full of old women, is what I'd like to know."
"We're closed tomorrow, remember."
"How come?" Sully said.
"Thanksgiving, Sully."
"Oh, yeah." At the door Sully noticed Hattie was beginning to list slightly to starboard, so he took her by the shoulders and righted her.
"Sit straight," he said.
"Bad posture, you'll grow up crooked."
Hattie nodded and nodded at no external referent. Sully made a mental note to shoot himself before he got like that. A block down the street from Hattie's, two city workers were taking down the banner that had been strung across Main Street since September, where it had become the object of much discussion and derision. things are looking f in bath, it said. Some of the town's residents claimed that the banner made no sense because of the arrow.
Had a word been left out? Was the missing word hovering in midair above the arrow? Clive Peoples, whose idea the slogan had been, was deeply offended by these criticisms and remarked publicly that this had to be the dumbest town in the world if the people who lived there couldn't figure out that the arrow was a symbol for the word "up." It worked, he explained, on the same principle as in new york, which everybody knew was the cleverest promotional campaign in the entire history of promotional campaigns, turning a place nobody even wanted to hear about into a place everybody wanted to visit.
Anybody could see that the slogan was supposed to read "I Love New York," not "I Heart New York." The heart was a symbol, a shortcut.
The citizenry of Bath were not fetched by this argument. To most people it didn't seem that the word "up" needed to be symbolically abbreviated, brevity being the word's most obvious characteristic to begin with. After all, the banner stretched all the way across the street, and there was plenty of room for a two-letter word in the center of it. In fact, many of Clive Jr. "s opponents on the banner issue confessed to being less than taken with the "I Heart New York" campaign as well. They remained to be convinced that upstate was much better off for it, and now, after three months of this new banner, the local merchants along Main still remained to be convinced that things were looking f in Bath either.
They were waiting for something tangible, like the reopening of the Sans Souci, or ground breaking on The Ultimate Escape Fun
"You don't need me, for one thing," he pointed out.
"Roof's talking about moving back to North CCarlina," she said without looking at the cook, who had taken a stool around the other side of the counter to enjoy the lull and was studying them.
"And has been for twenty years," Sully reminded her.
"I think he means it."
"He's meant it all along. Half the town's been meaning to leave. They don't, though, most of them."
"I know one person who's going to," Cass said, and she sounded like she meant it.
"The day after the funeral."
They both glanced at old Hatrie, who was leaning forward intently and grinning, as if she were in an arm-wrestling match with Death himself, an opponent she was confident of whipping.
"Maybe the day before."
Something of the desperation in her voice got through to Sully, who said, "Listen. You want to get out some night, let me know. I'll baby-sit." Cass smiled dubiously.
"And where would I go?"
Sully shrugged.
"How the hell should I know? A movie? I can't figure out everything for you." Cass smiled, didn't say anything immediately.
"I should take you up on it. Just to find out what you'd do when she wet her pants and asked you to change her." Sully tried to suppress a shudder and failed.
NOBODY'S FOOL 3
"Right." Cass nodded knowingly.
"I better go shovel my landlady out," he said.
"How'd this town get so full of old women, is what I'd like to know."
"We're closed tomorrow, remember."
"How come?" Sully said.
"Thanksgiving, Sully."
"Oh, yeah." At the door Sully noticed Hattie was beginning to list slightly to starboard, so he took her by the shoulders and righted her.
"Sit straight," he said.
"Bad posture, you'll grow up crooked."
Hattie nodded and nodded at no external referent. Sully made a mental note to shoot himself before he got like that. A block down the street from Hattie's, two city workers were taking down the banner that had been strung across Main Street since September, where it had become the object of much discussion and derision. things are looking f in bath, it said. Some of the town's residents claimed that the banner made no sense because of the arrow.
Had a word been left out? Was the missing word hovering in midair above the arrow? Clive Peoples, whose idea the slogan had been, was deeply offended by these criticisms and remarked publicly that this had to be the dumbest town in the world if the people who lived there couldn't figure out that the arrow was a symbol for the word "up." It worked, he explained, on the same principle as in new york, which everybody knew was the cleverest promotional campaign in the entire history of promotional campaigns, turning a place nobody even wanted to hear about into a place everybody wanted to visit.
Anybody could see that the slogan was supposed to read "I Love New York," not "I Heart New York." The heart was a symbol, a shortcut.
The citizenry of Bath were not fetched by this argument. To most people it didn't seem that the word "up" needed to be symbolically abbreviated, brevity being the word's most obvious characteristic to begin with. After all, the banner stretched all the way across the street, and there was plenty of room for a two-letter word in the center of it. In fact, many of Clive Jr. "s opponents on the banner issue confessed to being less than taken with the "I Heart New York" campaign as well. They remained to be convinced that upstate was much better off for it, and now, after three months of this new banner, the local merchants along Main still remained to be convinced that things were looking f in Bath either.
They were waiting for something tangible, like the reopening of the Sans Souci, or ground breaking on The Ultimate Escape Fun