Read Online Never Let You Go by Desmond Haas - Free Book Online Page B

you’re awake,” Linda said.
    “I’m doing okay,” Sam grumbled.
    “No, you’re really not. You’ve been a horse’s arse, shoving away all of us who love you. You’re a miserable bastard, and if they won’t confront you, I will. Remember, I was there when you told Marisa you loved her. Were you telling the truth?”
    “Why do you care?”
    “Because I love her, and I love you, and because of all I’ve seen and heard. So, tell me, do you love her?”
    “Look at me,” Sam said, raising his voice. “I can’t move without help. I can’t feel anything from my waist down, and my face was half burnt off. What the fuck does she want with someone like me who can’t even get it up?!”
    Linda ripped the sheets from the bed, reached into his pajamas and under the diaper, grabbing his flaccid penis. “Is this you?” She asked, also raising her voice to match his in tone and volume. “If you want to define yourself by your cock, go right ahead. That makes the rest of you a prick!
    “If you think for one minute that woman flew all the way over here just to get laid, you don’t know her as well as I thought you did. She didn’t fall in love with any part of your anatomy. She fell in love with you.”
    Linda pulled the sheet back up, covering him, then pulled a chair next to the bed and sat down. She put her hand on Sam’s arm and let out a deep breath.
    “Do you love her?” Linda asked quietly and tilted her head up to see Sam’s eyes. “Do you love her?” she asked again.
    Sam looked at Linda and, with tears welling up, he said, “Yes. Yes, I do.”
    “Then why in bloody hell are you not thinking of her, but only yourself?”
    “I was only trying to prevent her from being hurt, because I can’t do the things I used to.”
    “I know that. Did you know she quit her job, put all of her things in storage, closed her flat, and said that no matter what you say or do, she’s not leaving you? Let me tell you something, I’ve known her since we were wee ones, and when that woman digs her heels in, nothing will change her mind. You’re in for a rough ride, Sam. She won’t give up. So, if you want to be a miserable old fart wasting away someday in an institution, that’s your business. If she ever chooses to throw up her hands and admit defeat, that’s where you’ll be. Is that what you want? But if that woman gets her way, you don’t have a bloody chance in hell. Okay?”
    “She doesn’t need to spend her life caring for an invalid, like me,” Sam said.
    “Marisa can no more walk away from you than she can stop breathing. She loves you, and if you force her to leave, it would kill her. Do you want to hurt her like that? Let me ask you this: if the situation was reversed and she were lying here, what would you do? Would you walk away and leave her because she’s like you are?
    “I don’t know what to do.”
    “To start with, you can be not so bloody moody and treat her with respect. She caters to you day and night and never complains. Judith and I haven’t heard a mumble, much less a full-blown rant. You, on the other hand, are distant all the time. Do you know she sleeps on the couch, right outside this room, so she can hear you if you call? She’s a bloody saint, that one is. And, because you treat her the way you do, she cries herself to sleep. She’s here for you, Sam.”
    “I…I don’t know how to fix it,” he said.
    “If I were you, I’d ask her for a hug and take it from there. You can do that, can’t you?
    “I guess.”
    “You have to start facing the future, Sam. If you’re going to be in that wheelchair the rest of your life, you won’t find a better person by your side than her. Do you want me to send her in now?”
    “Please and Linda, when I get done apologizing to Marisa, will you come back and give me a hug, please?”
    “Why wait,” she said, standing up, she put her arms around his neck and kissed him. “Sam, she loves you very much. While you’re at it, you need