Read Online Murder by Magic by Rosemary Edghill - Free Book Online Page A

shelves, the cages containing live chickens, and the bottles of blood. My perfect double shattered into a million pieces in the hail of Carmine’s bullets, and the pieces fell smoldering into the fire. Then Tony kicked at the fire until it was scattered all over the living room and started dying.
    “It’s a fucking shame about the carpet,” Carmine said as chickens escaped the shattered cages and started running all over the room.
    “. . . blessed art thou among women, and blessed is the fruit of thy womb . . .” Father Michael was chanting.
    “What else can I break? What else can I break?” Tony shouted.
    “I’ll kill you all!” the Widow screamed. “You’re all dead!”
    “Too late, sister, we’re onto you now. You’ve whacked your last wiseguy,” I said as she struggled in my grip.
    “Three husbands I lost in your damned wars!” she screamed. “I told them to get out of organized crime and into something secure, like accounting or the restaurant business, but would they listen?
Noooo!
”
    “Secure? The fucking restaurant business? Are you kidding me?”
    “The Berninis and Gambones ruined my life!” the Widow Butera shrieked. “I will have vengeance on you all!”
    “Repent! Repent!” Father Michael cried. Then he doused her with a whole bottle of holy water.
    “Eeeeeeeeeee!”
She screamed something awful . . . and then started smoking like she was on fire.
    I’m not dumb. I let go of her and backed away.
    The room filled with smoke, and the Widow’s screams got louder, until they echoed so hard they made my teeth hurt . . . then faded. There was a dark scorch mark on the floor where she’d been standing.
    “Where’d she go?” I said.
    “She’ll never get her fucking security deposit back now,” said Carmine, looking at the floor.
    Tony added, “No amount of buffing will get that out.”
    “What the hell happened?” I said, looking around the room. The Widow had vanished.
    Father Michael fell to his knees and crossed himself. “I don’t think she was completely human. At least, not anymore. She had become Satan’s minion.”
    “Huh. I wondered how she kept her good looks for so fucking long.”
    “That’s it?” I asked Father Michael. “She’s just . . . gone?”
    He nodded. “In hell, where she belongs.” After a moment he added, “Mind you, that’s only a theory.”
    “Either way,” I said, “I’m kinda relieved. I know we couldn’t just let her go. Not after she’d hit three guys and tried to hit me and Joey, too. But I really didn’t want to whack a broad.”
    “What a fucking pussy you are, Vito.”
    “Carmine, you asshole,” I said, “the sit-down was successful. We found out who’s behind these hits, we put a stop to it, and there ain’t gonna be no new war. So now get outta my sight before I forget my manners and whack you just for the hell of it.”
    “Did I mention how much fun it was pumping a whole clip into your fucking doppelgangster?”
    My cell phone rang, making Father Michael jump.
    “Damn.” I knew who it was even before I answered it. “Hello?”
    “Vito,” said Joey, “I’ve been sitting here in my car, not going anywhere, just like you said, for a whole hour. Now, do you want to tell me what the hell is going on?”
    I looked at the scorched spot the Widow had left in the floor and tried to think of the best way to break the news to him. “So, Joey . . . would you still want to marry the Widow Butera if you knew she’d been trying to whack you and everyone you know?”

Mixed Marriages Can Be Murder
    Will Graham
    Will Graham is the pseudonym of a private investigator in Texas specializing in computer forensics and electronic evidence. This is his first short-story sale.
    I looked at my cigarette as the flame caught, while the coffee finished brewing. It was an old trick, but still a fun one, and I liked being able to do it after all these years. Another beautiful day. Leaning against the counter in the kitchen, I glanced out