far, Charles might expect something more. We hadnt even kissed yet, however, and the agreement had been that we come here to talk.
Still, I wondered how I would react if Charles made a move.
Ill order the water, he said. He took two steps beside the desk, unsure whether to seat himself on the swing-out chair or the edge of the bed beside me. Gassed or plain?
Plain, I said.
He set his slate on the desk port and placed an order. Theyre slow. Should take about five minutes. Old arbeiters, he said.
Creaky, I said.
He smiled, sat on the chair, and looked around. Not much luxury, he said. Cant afford more. The one chair, a small net and com desk, single drop-down bed with its thin blanket, vapor bag behind a narrow door, sink and toilet folded into the wall behind a curtainall squeezed into three meters by four.
I casually wondered how many people had had sex in this room, and under what circumstances.
We could spend years trying to figure out Sean and Gretyl, Charles said. I dont want you to think Ive forgotten what happened.
Oh, no, I said.
But Ive got too much else to ponder, really. He used the word in a kind of self-parody, to deflate the burden it might carry. I cant worry about the mistakes we made.
Did we make mistakes? I asked. I smoothed some wrinkles in the thin blanket.
I think so.
What mistakes? I led him on, angry again but hiding it.
Charles finally pulled out the chair and sat with his elbows on his knees, hands clasped in front of him. We should choose our leaders more carefully, he said.
Do you think Sean was a bad leader?
You said he was monstrous, Charles reminded me.
Things went wrong for all of us, I said. If they had gone better, everything might have turned out differently.
You mean, if Connor and Dauble hadnt hung themselves, we might have provided the noose.
It seems likely.
I suppose thats what Sean and Gretyl were trying to do, Charles said.
All of us, I added.
Right. But what would we have done after that? What did Sean really want to accomplish?
In the long ran? I asked.
Right, Charles said. He was revealing a capacity I hadnt seen before. I was curious to see how far this new depth extended. I think they wanted anarchy.
I frowned abruptly.
He looked at me and his face stiffened. But I didnt really
Why would they want anarchy?
Sean wants to be a leader. But he can never be a consensus leader.
Why not?
He has the appeal of a LitVid image, Charles said. How could he not see how much he was irritating me? I felt a perversity again; I wanted him to anger me, so I could deny him what he had come here to gain, that is, my favors.
Shallow?
Im sorry, this is upsetting you, Charles said softly, kneading his hands. I know you liked Sean. It makes me I didnt want to bring you here to
The door chimed. Charles opened it and an arbeiter entered, carrying a bottle of Durrey Region Prime Drinking Water, Mineral. Charles handed me a glass and sat again.
I really dont want to talk politics, he said. Im not very good at it.
We came here to talk about what went wrong, I persisted. Im curious to hear you out.
You disagree with me.
Maybe, I said. But I want to hear what you have to say.
Charless misery became obvious in the set of his jaw, drawn in defensively toward his neck, and the way he clenched his hands. All right, he said. I could sense him giving up, assuming I was out of his reach, and that added to my irritation. Such presumption!
What kind of leader would Sean be?
A tyrant, Charles said softly. Not a very good one. I dont think he has what it takes. Not enough charm at the right time, and he cant keep his feelings under control.
My anger evaporated. It was the strangest feeling; I agreed with Charles. That was the monstrousness I was trying to understand.
Youre a better judge of human nature than you think, I said with a sigh. I leaned back on the bed.
He shrugged sadly. But Ive fapped up, he said.
How?
I want to know you better. I feel something really special when I
Still, I wondered how I would react if Charles made a move.
Ill order the water, he said. He took two steps beside the desk, unsure whether to seat himself on the swing-out chair or the edge of the bed beside me. Gassed or plain?
Plain, I said.
He set his slate on the desk port and placed an order. Theyre slow. Should take about five minutes. Old arbeiters, he said.
Creaky, I said.
He smiled, sat on the chair, and looked around. Not much luxury, he said. Cant afford more. The one chair, a small net and com desk, single drop-down bed with its thin blanket, vapor bag behind a narrow door, sink and toilet folded into the wall behind a curtainall squeezed into three meters by four.
I casually wondered how many people had had sex in this room, and under what circumstances.
We could spend years trying to figure out Sean and Gretyl, Charles said. I dont want you to think Ive forgotten what happened.
Oh, no, I said.
But Ive got too much else to ponder, really. He used the word in a kind of self-parody, to deflate the burden it might carry. I cant worry about the mistakes we made.
Did we make mistakes? I asked. I smoothed some wrinkles in the thin blanket.
I think so.
What mistakes? I led him on, angry again but hiding it.
Charles finally pulled out the chair and sat with his elbows on his knees, hands clasped in front of him. We should choose our leaders more carefully, he said.
Do you think Sean was a bad leader?
You said he was monstrous, Charles reminded me.
Things went wrong for all of us, I said. If they had gone better, everything might have turned out differently.
You mean, if Connor and Dauble hadnt hung themselves, we might have provided the noose.
It seems likely.
I suppose thats what Sean and Gretyl were trying to do, Charles said.
All of us, I added.
Right. But what would we have done after that? What did Sean really want to accomplish?
In the long ran? I asked.
Right, Charles said. He was revealing a capacity I hadnt seen before. I was curious to see how far this new depth extended. I think they wanted anarchy.
I frowned abruptly.
He looked at me and his face stiffened. But I didnt really
Why would they want anarchy?
Sean wants to be a leader. But he can never be a consensus leader.
Why not?
He has the appeal of a LitVid image, Charles said. How could he not see how much he was irritating me? I felt a perversity again; I wanted him to anger me, so I could deny him what he had come here to gain, that is, my favors.
Shallow?
Im sorry, this is upsetting you, Charles said softly, kneading his hands. I know you liked Sean. It makes me I didnt want to bring you here to
The door chimed. Charles opened it and an arbeiter entered, carrying a bottle of Durrey Region Prime Drinking Water, Mineral. Charles handed me a glass and sat again.
I really dont want to talk politics, he said. Im not very good at it.
We came here to talk about what went wrong, I persisted. Im curious to hear you out.
You disagree with me.
Maybe, I said. But I want to hear what you have to say.
Charless misery became obvious in the set of his jaw, drawn in defensively toward his neck, and the way he clenched his hands. All right, he said. I could sense him giving up, assuming I was out of his reach, and that added to my irritation. Such presumption!
What kind of leader would Sean be?
A tyrant, Charles said softly. Not a very good one. I dont think he has what it takes. Not enough charm at the right time, and he cant keep his feelings under control.
My anger evaporated. It was the strangest feeling; I agreed with Charles. That was the monstrousness I was trying to understand.
Youre a better judge of human nature than you think, I said with a sigh. I leaned back on the bed.
He shrugged sadly. But Ive fapped up, he said.
How?
I want to know you better. I feel something really special when I
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