Read Online Me, My Elf & I by Heather Swain - Free Book Online Page B

hand curls into a fist, raises to my lips, and the words “f lotsam, jetsam, tantrum” are on the tip of my tongue. But I stop myself. Instead of unleashing a temporary babbling spell that would make her ramble about any thought that entered her head for the next five minutes, I press my fist against my lips and swallow my words. Back in Alverland, if one of my friends were teasing me (although elves are rarely that unkind), I would smack her with this little spell just for kicks. And she’d retaliate, casting a counterspell as quickly as she could. It’s a game, a harmless one that’s tolerated by our parents because it sharpens our skills. But here, I have to be careful not to expose myself. The only weapons I have now are words, without the magic.
    “It’s a tunic,” I tell her sharply. “And my grandmother wove it for me from flax that she grows.”
    “Oh, really?” Chelsea feigns disbelief. “And I thought it was Prada.”
    “It’s cooler than Prada,” Timber says. “I hate that crap. So boring.”
    “You like it fine when Bella’s in it,” Chelsea says.
    Timber shrugs with a little smirk on his face. The people around us mutter and laugh, but then our instructor walks in, singing a major scale in his booming alto voice, and everyone snaps to attention. I do the same, happy to lose myself in music, when who I am and what I’m wearing fades as I become a part of a song.
     
    “She called it a muumuu,” I tell Ari and Mercedes. We’re out in the courtyard behind the school instead of in the cafeteria because it’s such a gorgeous day. Ari and Mercedes spent the first fifteen minutes of lunch explaining to me where each group sits, what tables are safe, and when I should come out here. Before school and during lunch is fine. During or after school means you’re a druggie. Except for Bella, of course, because no rules apply to her. And when she’s out here, she always sits at the table in the middle.
    “Which one was it?” Ari asks. We sneak a peek at Bella’s foursome in their usual spot center stage. I immediately notice that Timber isn’t with them and my stomach sinks. I haven’t mentioned to Ari and Mercedes that he liked my tunic or made a point to sit next to me during ensemble.
    “The redhead with the nose ring and that tiny little skirt,” I tell them.
    “Chelsea. Such a skank,” Mercedes says. “They’re all like Bella’s freakin’ lap dogs.” Mercedes holds her hands like paws in front of her chest and starts sniffing around, wagging her head, and whimpering. “Anything I can do, Bella? What do you need, Bella? Want me to sniff your butt, Bella?”
    As Mercedes is doing her doggy impression, Jilly, the queen fairy, walks by. “Oh hey, Zephyr,” she says. “How’s it going?”
    “Great,” I tell her. “But I’m worried that I made Rienna mad this morning.”
    “Don’t worry about it,” Jilly says with a wave of her hand. “Poor Rienna has been crushing on that guy since she was in preschool. She’ll get over it.”
    “What guy?” Mercedes asks, but I ignore her question.
    “Where are Rienna and Darby?” I ask Jilly.
    “I don’t know,” she says, craning her neck. “I was just looking for them.”
    “You want to sit with us?” I scoot over to make room between Ari and me.
    Jilly looks blankly at Mercedes and Ari, who look blankly back at her. “No thanks,” she says. “I’m sure I’ll find my girls.”
    “See you later,” I call after her.
    Ari and Mercedes stare at each other, then they look at me. “You and Tinkerbell best friends now?” Mercedes asks. “Because the fairies sit over there with the other drama turds.”
    Before I can answer or point out that Mercedes does drama, a guy named Zack who was my lab partner in biology this morning waves to me from a table full of boys on the other side of the courtyard. “Hey Zephyr, come here,” he calls out. “These guys don’t believe that you know how to skin a deer.”
    “What are you