this, Tanya?”
“Where am I going with this?”
“Yes.”
“I’ll tell you where I’m going with this. Jesus, Johnny, I’m not a fucking idiot. You’ve fallen in love with her, haven’t you, you spineless little bastard?”
“You’re crazy.”
He laughed a false laugh, hiding his guilty face from the firelight in a billow of smoke until a sneaky breeze came from nowhere and blew away his cover.
“I told you, Johnny: fuck your lungs out, but don’t get stupid.”
“You’re dreaming.”
“I won’t let it happen. You know that.”
“You won’t let what happen?”
“I won’t let you leave, Johnny. Leaving is not an option.”
“What are you hanging on to this for, Tanya? This fucking sham of a marriage? Don’t tell me this makes you happy?”
She was close in to him, a warm rain of spittle striking his face.
“Happiness has got fuck all to do with it. I have a husband. I have a child. I will not lose them.”
“You won’t lose Lucy.”
She barked a laugh.
“Oh, come on, I’ve seen how she moons over that fat blonde cunt. Next thing you three’ll be shacking up in some sitcommy American bliss while I’m left alone. Fuck that.”
“You’ll have your career.”
“My career ?”
“Yes, your career.”
“Now, at a time like this, you talk to me about my fucking job ? God, you’re a miserable piece of shit.”
He stared at her, mute in the face of her rage.
“Anyway, you know they refused me tenure?
“The university?”
“Yes, the fucking university.”
He shook his head.
“Well, they did.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because you’re not fucking interested in anything other than your cock.”
She crossed her arms. A familiar defensive posture.
“And they’re not going to renew my contract at the end of the semester.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No, you’re not.”
“I’ll take care of you. Financially.”
“What’s this? A pay off?”
“No. I’m just being fair.”
“ Fair ? You wouldn’t know fair if it lassoed you and fucked you up the arse.”
“I want out, Tanya.”
“Out?”
“Yes. Out.”
“There is no fucking out . Not after what you did in Johannesburg. You miserable little bastard, I saved you, I did something for you that nobody else would’ve done. I liberated you. But, no, you chose to see it as entrapment. Imprisonment. You retreated and withdrew from me.”
She looked at him and something shifted in her eyes and for just a second the flames of the barbecue revealed an unfamiliar vulnerability and then she shut that down and slapped him hard through the face.
“And now you have the fucking gall to get all soppy over that fat bottle blonde bitch.”
Cheeks stinging, Turner gave her his back, tending the sausage, the sheath tearing and fat oozing out, sizzling on the fire.
Tanya hit him between the shoulder blades with the flat of her fist.
“I’ll talk. I’ll tell everything I know about what you did ten years ago. Every fucking thing.”
Turner swung on her.
“Even you wouldn’t be crazy enough to do that.”
“Wouldn’t I? Fucking try me.”
“You’d be implicated.”
“No, I wouldn’t. I’m a lawyer, Johnny, remember? I know how to do these things. You’ll go down and I’ll stand watching, waving goodbye.”
Flames flared on the grill, charring the sausage, but Turner’s eyes never left Tanya’s.
“Oh good, he’s finally paying fucking attention.”
She stepped in very close to him and he could smell her armpits over the wood smoke.
“This is how it’s going to go. Get rid of that cunt. Fire her. Tomorrow. I don’t want to see that fat arse of hers here again. Ever. You hearing me?”
“Yes, I’m hearing you.”
“You don’t do it and I swear I will start making phone calls.”
“I’ll do it.”
“Good. Now you step back into line, Johnny, and put the lid on this midlife crisis of yours. Pack away your dick and your cheap sentimentality and go back to zombieland. Appreciate
“Where am I going with this?”
“Yes.”
“I’ll tell you where I’m going with this. Jesus, Johnny, I’m not a fucking idiot. You’ve fallen in love with her, haven’t you, you spineless little bastard?”
“You’re crazy.”
He laughed a false laugh, hiding his guilty face from the firelight in a billow of smoke until a sneaky breeze came from nowhere and blew away his cover.
“I told you, Johnny: fuck your lungs out, but don’t get stupid.”
“You’re dreaming.”
“I won’t let it happen. You know that.”
“You won’t let what happen?”
“I won’t let you leave, Johnny. Leaving is not an option.”
“What are you hanging on to this for, Tanya? This fucking sham of a marriage? Don’t tell me this makes you happy?”
She was close in to him, a warm rain of spittle striking his face.
“Happiness has got fuck all to do with it. I have a husband. I have a child. I will not lose them.”
“You won’t lose Lucy.”
She barked a laugh.
“Oh, come on, I’ve seen how she moons over that fat blonde cunt. Next thing you three’ll be shacking up in some sitcommy American bliss while I’m left alone. Fuck that.”
“You’ll have your career.”
“My career ?”
“Yes, your career.”
“Now, at a time like this, you talk to me about my fucking job ? God, you’re a miserable piece of shit.”
He stared at her, mute in the face of her rage.
“Anyway, you know they refused me tenure?
“The university?”
“Yes, the fucking university.”
He shook his head.
“Well, they did.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because you’re not fucking interested in anything other than your cock.”
She crossed her arms. A familiar defensive posture.
“And they’re not going to renew my contract at the end of the semester.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No, you’re not.”
“I’ll take care of you. Financially.”
“What’s this? A pay off?”
“No. I’m just being fair.”
“ Fair ? You wouldn’t know fair if it lassoed you and fucked you up the arse.”
“I want out, Tanya.”
“Out?”
“Yes. Out.”
“There is no fucking out . Not after what you did in Johannesburg. You miserable little bastard, I saved you, I did something for you that nobody else would’ve done. I liberated you. But, no, you chose to see it as entrapment. Imprisonment. You retreated and withdrew from me.”
She looked at him and something shifted in her eyes and for just a second the flames of the barbecue revealed an unfamiliar vulnerability and then she shut that down and slapped him hard through the face.
“And now you have the fucking gall to get all soppy over that fat bottle blonde bitch.”
Cheeks stinging, Turner gave her his back, tending the sausage, the sheath tearing and fat oozing out, sizzling on the fire.
Tanya hit him between the shoulder blades with the flat of her fist.
“I’ll talk. I’ll tell everything I know about what you did ten years ago. Every fucking thing.”
Turner swung on her.
“Even you wouldn’t be crazy enough to do that.”
“Wouldn’t I? Fucking try me.”
“You’d be implicated.”
“No, I wouldn’t. I’m a lawyer, Johnny, remember? I know how to do these things. You’ll go down and I’ll stand watching, waving goodbye.”
Flames flared on the grill, charring the sausage, but Turner’s eyes never left Tanya’s.
“Oh good, he’s finally paying fucking attention.”
She stepped in very close to him and he could smell her armpits over the wood smoke.
“This is how it’s going to go. Get rid of that cunt. Fire her. Tomorrow. I don’t want to see that fat arse of hers here again. Ever. You hearing me?”
“Yes, I’m hearing you.”
“You don’t do it and I swear I will start making phone calls.”
“I’ll do it.”
“Good. Now you step back into line, Johnny, and put the lid on this midlife crisis of yours. Pack away your dick and your cheap sentimentality and go back to zombieland. Appreciate
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