Brigitte said quietly, “I suppose we are living here because this is our home.”
It was obvious to Lucky from Brigitte’s tone of voice during this second conversation that she was worn out reassuring Mrs. Wellborne. Finally Brigitte said, “I tell you something, Carmen. The whole world is full of danger. But also it is full of beauty and courage and many wonders. We both have the daughter to protect, but if we protect a little bit too much, they do not realize that we trust them to make good choices and to be brave. Sometimes they make the little mistake, and that is one way they learn. So you have to decide to trust or do not trust.”
In her canned-ham trailer, where she was listening through the open doorway, Lucky hugged HMS Beagle. It was a splendissimo speech and Lucky was positive that Carmen, having already allowed Paloma to visit Hard Pan once, would decide to trust. And since she felt so triumphant, Lucky didn’t know why, suddenly, she was crying into the Beag’s silky coat. Silently, so Brigitte wouldn’t hear, Lucky held on and cried and stroked the Beag, stroked and stroked her warm coat until the hard metallic phantom sensation of scissors against her skin finally went away. Then Lucky released her dog and stretched up the neck of her nightgown to press it hard against her eyes. And she made herself envision the vast timelessness of space, where trust is only a tiny speck, practically invisible, lost and all but unimportant in the infinity of the universe.
Feeling weary, Lucky picked up her notebook again and penciled in the three dwarf planets and an assortment of asteroids and meteoroids, labeling them “small bodies,” which is the official scientific term. It was a big family, the solar system, withall those other planets’ moons, way over a hundred of them, but she only showed our own moon, a tiny circle. She shaded in Jupiter, which is huge and uninhabitable for humans. Lucky often wondered if there were other planets not in our solar system but somewhere in our own galaxy, the far-off Milky Way, with nice weather and drinking water and lots of animals adapted to their habitats like on Earth. Sometimes she longed for there to be another planet somewhere, like ours. The idea of the Earth being the only planet with life in the whole universe became, to Lucky at that moment, unbearably lonely and sad.
Brigitte was saying, “Yes, the girls sleep in the trailer—Paloma can have Lucky’s bed and I make a little bed on the floor for Lucky. No, no, it is fine. No, the dog has not fleas….” Lucky rolled her eyes to herself. If dogs could roll their eyes, Lucky was sure that HMS Beagle would do so too.
Lucky would have jumped on a rocket, with no hesitation, to go to another planet and see the life on it, but Mrs. Wellborne was afraid of a little town in the desert, where nothing bad could possibly happen.
14. chesterfield
In the middle of the night, a noise—so loud and close that it jolted the canned-ham trailer—made Lucky sit bolt upright. HMS Beagle bounded to the door. Seconds later Brigitte flew in, leaped on the bed, and grabbed Lucky in both her arms. The noise—neither human nor machine—blasted into the trailer again. It sounded like an enormous giant jumping on the creaky, rusty metal bedsprings of an old bed with no mattress. Up and down the giant jumped, ancient metal shrieking into an amplified microphone. Brigitte held on tighter, and Lucky could feel her heart pounding.
“What is this terrible sound?” Brigitte whispered.
Lucky had heard it before, though never from so close. “It’s a burro,” she said.
Brigitte loosened her grip. Lucky’s eyes were getting used to the dark, and she could see Brigitte’s scared-looking face by the moonlight through the window. Even after living there morethan two years, Brigitte found life in the high desert mysterious and sometimes threatening.
“What is he doing here?” she asked, already going from scared to mad. “This
It was obvious to Lucky from Brigitte’s tone of voice during this second conversation that she was worn out reassuring Mrs. Wellborne. Finally Brigitte said, “I tell you something, Carmen. The whole world is full of danger. But also it is full of beauty and courage and many wonders. We both have the daughter to protect, but if we protect a little bit too much, they do not realize that we trust them to make good choices and to be brave. Sometimes they make the little mistake, and that is one way they learn. So you have to decide to trust or do not trust.”
In her canned-ham trailer, where she was listening through the open doorway, Lucky hugged HMS Beagle. It was a splendissimo speech and Lucky was positive that Carmen, having already allowed Paloma to visit Hard Pan once, would decide to trust. And since she felt so triumphant, Lucky didn’t know why, suddenly, she was crying into the Beag’s silky coat. Silently, so Brigitte wouldn’t hear, Lucky held on and cried and stroked the Beag, stroked and stroked her warm coat until the hard metallic phantom sensation of scissors against her skin finally went away. Then Lucky released her dog and stretched up the neck of her nightgown to press it hard against her eyes. And she made herself envision the vast timelessness of space, where trust is only a tiny speck, practically invisible, lost and all but unimportant in the infinity of the universe.
Feeling weary, Lucky picked up her notebook again and penciled in the three dwarf planets and an assortment of asteroids and meteoroids, labeling them “small bodies,” which is the official scientific term. It was a big family, the solar system, withall those other planets’ moons, way over a hundred of them, but she only showed our own moon, a tiny circle. She shaded in Jupiter, which is huge and uninhabitable for humans. Lucky often wondered if there were other planets not in our solar system but somewhere in our own galaxy, the far-off Milky Way, with nice weather and drinking water and lots of animals adapted to their habitats like on Earth. Sometimes she longed for there to be another planet somewhere, like ours. The idea of the Earth being the only planet with life in the whole universe became, to Lucky at that moment, unbearably lonely and sad.
Brigitte was saying, “Yes, the girls sleep in the trailer—Paloma can have Lucky’s bed and I make a little bed on the floor for Lucky. No, no, it is fine. No, the dog has not fleas….” Lucky rolled her eyes to herself. If dogs could roll their eyes, Lucky was sure that HMS Beagle would do so too.
Lucky would have jumped on a rocket, with no hesitation, to go to another planet and see the life on it, but Mrs. Wellborne was afraid of a little town in the desert, where nothing bad could possibly happen.
14. chesterfield
In the middle of the night, a noise—so loud and close that it jolted the canned-ham trailer—made Lucky sit bolt upright. HMS Beagle bounded to the door. Seconds later Brigitte flew in, leaped on the bed, and grabbed Lucky in both her arms. The noise—neither human nor machine—blasted into the trailer again. It sounded like an enormous giant jumping on the creaky, rusty metal bedsprings of an old bed with no mattress. Up and down the giant jumped, ancient metal shrieking into an amplified microphone. Brigitte held on tighter, and Lucky could feel her heart pounding.
“What is this terrible sound?” Brigitte whispered.
Lucky had heard it before, though never from so close. “It’s a burro,” she said.
Brigitte loosened her grip. Lucky’s eyes were getting used to the dark, and she could see Brigitte’s scared-looking face by the moonlight through the window. Even after living there morethan two years, Brigitte found life in the high desert mysterious and sometimes threatening.
“What is he doing here?” she asked, already going from scared to mad. “This