appointment is at six so I wanted to make sure we didn’t get stuck in traffic.”
“Oh, I could cancel it. I mean because I have more work and I don’t want this project to get behind and ¾ ”
Ryan interrupts before I continue to ramble on. “No, the work is fine, this is more important. Plus I know deep down you want to go. Come on, love.” He hold his hand out to me, but I look down at my key board desperate to find more excuses as to why this should be postponed. I come up empty though. “Plus I have some cars I want to talk to you about.”
Gnawing at the inside of my cheek I get up slowly, drawing out every movement before walking out of my office, in hopes of some diversion. Ryan holds my hand and walks us to his car. In a way it’s almost as if he’s dragging me out, but he’s right; deep down I want to go. It’s time to move beyond some of this. I know from past experience that therapy does help.
Once in the car Ryan talks to me about a few different SUV’s that he thinks I’d like. He goes into details about the specifications and when I ask about price he ignores my question. Then he tells me that he also talked to the auto repair shop and told them to go ahead and fix up my Civic. This makes me happy and eases my nerves. Leaning across the middle console in Ryan’s car, I place a peck on his cheek and slip my hand back into his.
“Oh, Carrie said your parents are having us for dinner on Saturday. I told her we’d be there,” I tell him.
“I was thinking we’d skip out on it,” he says casually.
“No we need to go. Eventually they’ll get over this elopement , as they call it.” I snicker, knowing he’ll find the humor in it.
Shaking his head with a tight smile he asks, “Are you sure you’re up for it?”
I contemplate this before answering him. “Yes, of course. We have to try to move past this. It’s your family.”
We both smile and he squeezes my hand reassuringly. When we pull up to the office building, my smile quickly fades into a tight-lipped purse. As Ryan pulls into a parking spot close to the ramp to the doors of the building, I turn my head to stare out the passenger side window and contemplate what will come of this.
My sisters had been at college for at least a couple of months and I still barely left my bedroom. Today was the day though. I had promised I would go to therapy. Staring at myself in the full-length mirror on the back of my door, I smoothed my hands over my fully-clothed body. My jeans fit me just right, but now they seemed too tight and revealing. I decided to grab one of my oversized hoodies to cover me up more. I’ve never worn a lot of make-up, unlike Mya, and today I kept my skin bare except for moisturizer.
Slowly, I opened my bedroom door and walked downstairs. Just as I’m about to head into the kitchen, I stopped as I heard my parents talking. There was strain in my mom’s voice; I could hear it in her accent. I couldn’t tell if she was mad or just upset.
“Brian, you’re too absent in their lives,” I heard her tell my dad.
I stepped closer to the entrance of the kitchen, yet kept myself hidden. “I’m working, you know this. That’s why you’ve always stayed home.” I couldn’t be sure, but I think I heard irritation in my dad’s tone.
“This is different. Mikaela needs her parents right now. Something is wrong.” She paused and I could hear her running the water in the sink. She always used my full name when talking to Dad, but I preferred her to call me Mik. The water stopped and she continued. “She’s my baby and I’m so worried about her. This is too extreme for her.”
The chair my dad must have been sitting in screeched across the tile and his heavy footsteps walked. “She’s my baby too,” he snapped. “Quit being so dramatic, Cecilia. This is Mikaela … she’s different. She’s always been more disconnected.”
Pulling me out of my memory, my car door opens with Ryan holding his hand out
Diana Quincy
Jean Plaidy
Kimberly Stedronsky
J A Howell
Amelia Grey
Angel C. Ernst
Judy Gelman, Vicki Levy Krupp
Elen Sentier
T. Jefferson Parker
Beverly Tobocman