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Authors: Gwendolyn Zepeda
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Sandy’s hand and started to lead her to the back of the salon. But Sandy dug in her heels. She pulled her hand away
and protectively touched her glasses, her hair, her glasses again.
Something in the pit of her stomach was telling her this was wrong. Whatever they wanted her to be, she wasn’t sure she could
pull it off. She was already stretching her limits by writing things she’d never learned to write in J school. But now Angelica
was asking her to be someone else.
Sandy knew she could write anything, learn anything, understand anything that anyone put before her. But she wasn’t at all
sure that she could be what Angelica was asking, or even fake it. Sandy was afraid she couldn’t deliver. She was afraid she
would fail.
“Sandy,” Angelica said, putting her hand on the younger woman’s shoulder again. “Trust me. I promise you’re going to like
it. And, if you don’t, I promise that you can go right back to the way you were.”
“It’s not that I don’t think it’ll look good,” Sandy said. “It’s just that… I’m not sure I can
change
.”
What would Daniel say? she suddenly wondered. He’d say he’d told her so, that this job wasn’t about her writing or her intellect,
but something crass and shallow.
She imagined him reacting to a more polished—no, a
sexier
Sandy. Would he think she looked shallow? Or would he be more upset that she no longer looked like one of his adoring students?
Again Sandy felt the impulse to rebel against Daniel’s ideas of what she should be.
What would her mother say? Sandy grimaced. Probably that Angelica wasn’t going far
enough
. If her mom were there, she’d consider this a dream come true. A free makeover, by the editor of
Mujer
? Her mom would be crying out for tacky blond highlights and rhinestoned, two-tone nails.
Thinking of it that way, Sandy felt her impulse reverse. There was nothing wrong with the way she was now. Why should she
change?
“I’m not asking you to change,” Angelica murmured into her ear, as if she could read Sandy’s mind. “I just want to bring out
what’s already there. Show everyone who Sandy Saavedra really is.”
With that the balance was finally tipped. Sandy let them lead her to the inner room of the salon, to find her new, real self.
17
Reader comments on My Modern TragiComedy, Tuesday, March 28
I found your blog by searching for information on divorced parents. What you said, I totally agree with. I feel the same way
about my mom and dad sometimes. Thank you for writing it. It’s good to know I’m not alone.
Comment left by:
Anonymous
OMG, you go girl! I’ve been thinking for a while now that HTG Boy doesn’t appreciate you enough! He’d better watch his step
or else he won’t have you around to take for granted anymore!
Comment left by:
Pilot Girl
Hi, TragiComic Girl. Keep your chin up. Hopefully HTGB will come around soon.:)
Comment left by:
Sunny B
18
T he latest blog comments were very touching. Plus Sandy had apparently gained a new reader. But, for a split second, she regretted
saying what she had about Daniel. She’d been angry at the time and had been overcome by the desire to vent.
Now that she
had
vented, now that she sat on her sofa, re-reading her words from the other night, they sounded pretty harsh. Daniel was annoying
sometimes, but he wasn’t
that
bad. Was he?
Sandy wondered if she should delete that blog entry now that it no longer expressed her current feelings.
But then, she realized, she’d have leftover comments from readers relating to that entry. So she’d have to delete those, too.
And, somehow, it seemed wrong to delete readers’ comments once they’d been posted. It seemed unethical. She was sure, in fact,
that there was an applicable rule somewhere in one of her old journalism textbooks.
The thing to do, she decided, was to print a retraction. She would post another entry, explaining that she’d been angry and
had overreacted,
and protectively touched her glasses, her hair, her glasses again.
Something in the pit of her stomach was telling her this was wrong. Whatever they wanted her to be, she wasn’t sure she could
pull it off. She was already stretching her limits by writing things she’d never learned to write in J school. But now Angelica
was asking her to be someone else.
Sandy knew she could write anything, learn anything, understand anything that anyone put before her. But she wasn’t at all
sure that she could be what Angelica was asking, or even fake it. Sandy was afraid she couldn’t deliver. She was afraid she
would fail.
“Sandy,” Angelica said, putting her hand on the younger woman’s shoulder again. “Trust me. I promise you’re going to like
it. And, if you don’t, I promise that you can go right back to the way you were.”
“It’s not that I don’t think it’ll look good,” Sandy said. “It’s just that… I’m not sure I can
change
.”
What would Daniel say? she suddenly wondered. He’d say he’d told her so, that this job wasn’t about her writing or her intellect,
but something crass and shallow.
She imagined him reacting to a more polished—no, a
sexier
Sandy. Would he think she looked shallow? Or would he be more upset that she no longer looked like one of his adoring students?
Again Sandy felt the impulse to rebel against Daniel’s ideas of what she should be.
What would her mother say? Sandy grimaced. Probably that Angelica wasn’t going far
enough
. If her mom were there, she’d consider this a dream come true. A free makeover, by the editor of
Mujer
? Her mom would be crying out for tacky blond highlights and rhinestoned, two-tone nails.
Thinking of it that way, Sandy felt her impulse reverse. There was nothing wrong with the way she was now. Why should she
change?
“I’m not asking you to change,” Angelica murmured into her ear, as if she could read Sandy’s mind. “I just want to bring out
what’s already there. Show everyone who Sandy Saavedra really is.”
With that the balance was finally tipped. Sandy let them lead her to the inner room of the salon, to find her new, real self.
17
Reader comments on My Modern TragiComedy, Tuesday, March 28
I found your blog by searching for information on divorced parents. What you said, I totally agree with. I feel the same way
about my mom and dad sometimes. Thank you for writing it. It’s good to know I’m not alone.
Comment left by:
Anonymous
OMG, you go girl! I’ve been thinking for a while now that HTG Boy doesn’t appreciate you enough! He’d better watch his step
or else he won’t have you around to take for granted anymore!
Comment left by:
Pilot Girl
Hi, TragiComic Girl. Keep your chin up. Hopefully HTGB will come around soon.:)
Comment left by:
Sunny B
18
T he latest blog comments were very touching. Plus Sandy had apparently gained a new reader. But, for a split second, she regretted
saying what she had about Daniel. She’d been angry at the time and had been overcome by the desire to vent.
Now that she
had
vented, now that she sat on her sofa, re-reading her words from the other night, they sounded pretty harsh. Daniel was annoying
sometimes, but he wasn’t
that
bad. Was he?
Sandy wondered if she should delete that blog entry now that it no longer expressed her current feelings.
But then, she realized, she’d have leftover comments from readers relating to that entry. So she’d have to delete those, too.
And, somehow, it seemed wrong to delete readers’ comments once they’d been posted. It seemed unethical. She was sure, in fact,
that there was an applicable rule somewhere in one of her old journalism textbooks.
The thing to do, she decided, was to print a retraction. She would post another entry, explaining that she’d been angry and
had overreacted,
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