Read Online Let Me Whisper You My Story by Moya Simons - Free Book Online Page B

mythroat. It seemed to grow, sprouting up like a mushroom. I was sure it would choke me if it became any bigger.
    I wondered when it would be safe for me to climb out of the cupboard. I felt so alone. There’d always been someone around to make decisions for me.
    T HERE WAS NOISE : footsteps and voices. The cupboard door was flung open and Mama’s frying pan was taken. Then I was seen.
    I didn’t see a face, just the hands that grabbed me. They were large and hairy with bulging veins forked beneath the skin.
    Like a dead weight, for I felt paralysed with fear, these hands pulled me out of the cupboard as though I was just another saucepan. I curled up on the floor and looked past a man and a woman to the empty space where my family had stood not so long ago.
    ‘Oh my God. She must be the child of the family who lived here. What do we do?’
    I stared at a woman with grey hair. It was twisted into a bun at the back of her head. She wore a floral dress and had an old lady’s body, thin and shapeless, and wore old lady’s laced shoes and thick stockings. Her face was deeply lined.
    I couldn’t cry. I was beyond tears. I was alone, with Mama, Papa, Miri gone.
    ‘There is a reward for handing over Jews,’ muttered the rough man.
    ‘No, we can’t do that. I know this family. I saw the family name on this journal, see here, on the table. MiriSchwarz . Her father is Dr Schwarz, a very good man. He used to treat my sister. I once went to their house to get him to come urgently in the middle of the night.’
    ‘So what?’ the rough man said. Grey bristles stuck out from his chin. He straightened the cap on his head and looked at me as if my life had the value of an annoying insect. I turned my face away.
    ‘I met Dr Schwarz before the laws were passed to forbid Jewish doctors from treating Germans and they were moved here. I’ve met Miri—a beautiful girl. Rachel is the youngest child in the family. We can’t hand her over.’
    ‘You’re mad. We risk our lives for what? The life of one Jewish child?’
    He scratched his chin, studying me. If I had been a snail I would have retreated into my shell. If I had been an octopus I’d have covered my inky eyes with my tentacles. But I was just Rachel, who had nowhere to hide, no wardrobe to curl up in. I wanted Mama and Papa and Miri. I wanted them so badly. I felt so alone. Papa. Why did you leave me here?
    ‘I won’t turn her in. Oh, God help us, and we are stealing from her poor parents.’
    ‘This is madness, Gertrude. We’ve done nothing wrong. Everyone tries to loot Jewish homes after the Nazis have taken people away. That’s if they are lucky enough to find a place the Nazis haven’t boarded up immediately like this apartment block. That’s probably because she was on their list and they will come back and search for her. She is not our responsibility.’
    ‘Heinrich, I tell you I’ll not leave her here.’
    He grunted at her and said something I could not understand. His eyes narrowed, but this lady called Gertrude met his gaze directly.
    ‘I won’t leave without her.’
    Oh, it was so awful. Mama’s saucepans were scattered on the floor. The rough man, Heinrich, searched the other rooms. Miri’s journal lay like a tiny coffin on the table, and the world’s longest scarf was on the armchair, with its knitting needles poised.
    I’m alone. I should have gone with them. Why did Papa make me stay? I’m frightened.
    Gertrude ran quickly to the other rooms. She came back with armfuls of clothing, my clothing.
    I slowly stood up, my body still cramped. I twisted away from Gertrude’s strong hand as she grabbed me, ran to the armchair and took the scarf.
    ‘What is that? All right, bring it.’
    The pages of Miri’s journal turned over in the draft coming from downstairs, then settled on a blank page. A page yet to be written. I had to take my sister’s journal. It was all I had of her. I saw my doll Annie lying on the floor, and bent for her, but before