Read Online Las Vegas for Vegans by A. S. Patric - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: A. S. Patric
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severe expression. âI canât give you another vodka-orange, Sir. Weâre moving through turbulence.â She has bent over to explain and now she unfolds as though that was that.
âWhat? What kind of turbulence?â
âSevere turbulence, Sir. The overhead light is telling you to put on your seatbelt. And youâve been told to return your seats to an upright position. Could you please tell your wife to follow those instructions?â The plane bucks and the attendant stumbles forward and sprawls across their laps.
âSheâs not my wife,â he tells the attendant as she struggles to get up.
âI donât care who she is. Look after her,â the attendant says and pushes away.
âOne drink! Iâve been waiting for ten minutes. What about making up for lost time? Iâll throw it back like a shot.â She doesnât bother replying and leaves to tend to other raised arms.
The plane drops again into flickering lights and a moment of free-fall. He feels his stomach rise up in a brutal heave. He still wants that drink. Julia is dead to the world and he canât get her seat up from the reclining position. The plane has been rattling around for the last hour. It shakes violently now and hail scatters across the small windows.
Thereâs a boy sitting over the aisle about to start crying. His father is next to him, looking out his window, saying, âOh my fucking God, that does not look good.â His son stares straight ahead into a laptop console, trying to focus on a film breaking up in lines of static. He has his headphones on, so maybe he doesnât hear his father say, âGod, fucken hell, itâs the end of the world out there!â
When he notices Keith staring, he doesnât disguise his fear. âI canât believe how much lightning there is,â he tells Keith. âAnd isnât metal a magnet for lightning?â
Keith looks away from the frightened man, saying, âWhatâs that honey?â as if he now needs to tend to his recumbent girlfriend. Julia has her eyes closed placidly and her mouth has formed a slightly pursed expression resembling a contented babyâs. Strange dreams of the North Pole arenât an issue at the moment, apparently. He pulls up her blanket, settling it around her neck, and makes a show of tending to her womanly fears.
Keith has always disliked sleeping pills. He reaches into Juliaâs handbag and looks for the small plastic bottle. He pulls out a few things. Her make-up bag, diary and duty-free carton of cigarettes. Eventually, he finds the empty bottle in an outside pocket. Not even one last pill. He runs his pinkie around the inside to make sure.
He opens the diary to distract himself, leafing through the pages at random. He stops at a mention of his own name. It says: âSeeing Keith bark like a little dog was hilarious. It was also so terribly sad. I suppose the hypnotist had to prove a point. The incredulous patient, sneering at even the idea of hypnosis, made to get down on all fours and scamper around the office. He even sniffed at Doctor Fassbinderâs bottom and that may have been the saddest thing of all. That was certainly going too far. The Doctor hadnât imagined how receptive a patient Keith would end up being. Needless to say Keith wonât even consider a cigarette now. In fact, heâs sure he was never a smoker. Ironically, Iâm smoking again and itâs only been three days since we went to see Doctor Fassbinder.â
Keith turns the pages again, this time looking for mention of Fassbinder. Another entry begins, âWe went to see the helpful Doctor Fassbinder about Keithâs sexual inadequacies â¦â
The lights in the plane are flickering and Keith is shaken out of the absorbing diary when thereâs prolonged darkness. Emergency lighting comes on. Keith looks at his sleeping girlfriend and then at her handbag and the carton of
âWhat? What kind of turbulence?â
âSevere turbulence, Sir. The overhead light is telling you to put on your seatbelt. And youâve been told to return your seats to an upright position. Could you please tell your wife to follow those instructions?â The plane bucks and the attendant stumbles forward and sprawls across their laps.
âSheâs not my wife,â he tells the attendant as she struggles to get up.
âI donât care who she is. Look after her,â the attendant says and pushes away.
âOne drink! Iâve been waiting for ten minutes. What about making up for lost time? Iâll throw it back like a shot.â She doesnât bother replying and leaves to tend to other raised arms.
The plane drops again into flickering lights and a moment of free-fall. He feels his stomach rise up in a brutal heave. He still wants that drink. Julia is dead to the world and he canât get her seat up from the reclining position. The plane has been rattling around for the last hour. It shakes violently now and hail scatters across the small windows.
Thereâs a boy sitting over the aisle about to start crying. His father is next to him, looking out his window, saying, âOh my fucking God, that does not look good.â His son stares straight ahead into a laptop console, trying to focus on a film breaking up in lines of static. He has his headphones on, so maybe he doesnât hear his father say, âGod, fucken hell, itâs the end of the world out there!â
When he notices Keith staring, he doesnât disguise his fear. âI canât believe how much lightning there is,â he tells Keith. âAnd isnât metal a magnet for lightning?â
Keith looks away from the frightened man, saying, âWhatâs that honey?â as if he now needs to tend to his recumbent girlfriend. Julia has her eyes closed placidly and her mouth has formed a slightly pursed expression resembling a contented babyâs. Strange dreams of the North Pole arenât an issue at the moment, apparently. He pulls up her blanket, settling it around her neck, and makes a show of tending to her womanly fears.
Keith has always disliked sleeping pills. He reaches into Juliaâs handbag and looks for the small plastic bottle. He pulls out a few things. Her make-up bag, diary and duty-free carton of cigarettes. Eventually, he finds the empty bottle in an outside pocket. Not even one last pill. He runs his pinkie around the inside to make sure.
He opens the diary to distract himself, leafing through the pages at random. He stops at a mention of his own name. It says: âSeeing Keith bark like a little dog was hilarious. It was also so terribly sad. I suppose the hypnotist had to prove a point. The incredulous patient, sneering at even the idea of hypnosis, made to get down on all fours and scamper around the office. He even sniffed at Doctor Fassbinderâs bottom and that may have been the saddest thing of all. That was certainly going too far. The Doctor hadnât imagined how receptive a patient Keith would end up being. Needless to say Keith wonât even consider a cigarette now. In fact, heâs sure he was never a smoker. Ironically, Iâm smoking again and itâs only been three days since we went to see Doctor Fassbinder.â
Keith turns the pages again, this time looking for mention of Fassbinder. Another entry begins, âWe went to see the helpful Doctor Fassbinder about Keithâs sexual inadequacies â¦â
The lights in the plane are flickering and Keith is shaken out of the absorbing diary when thereâs prolonged darkness. Emergency lighting comes on. Keith looks at his sleeping girlfriend and then at her handbag and the carton of
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