him for a long moment then said, in the oddest tone of voice, “I got exactly what I deserved.”
“You didn’t deserve an alcoholic.”
“James Robert, you’ve been sober for fifteen years. It’s all in the past. Forget about it.”
“I’ll never be able to forget it. Or what I did to you and Delaney,” he said. “I haven’t really made full amends.”
“Yes, you have.”
“If I’d truly made amends then why haven’t you forgiven me? I’m so sorry I hurt you, Honey. So very sorry.”
“You’re forgiven. Now can we stop talking about this, please?”
“You should have divorced me.”
“I’m going to keep this veil,” she said, getting up and crossing the room to put the veil in her closet. “If Delaney wants it back, she’s going to have to ask me for it.”
It irritated him that she pretended to forgive him when he knew she hadn’t. She punished him every day. Like shewas doing now. By not allowing him to say what he needed to say. By dismissing his apology as inconsequential.
“I want things to be better between us,” Jim Bob said. “Like they used to be when we were first married. Remember?”
“Let’s go to sleep, James Robert. It’s late.”
“Stop changing the subject. I don’t want to talk about wedding veils. I want to talk about us. How we’re going to spend the rest of our lives once Delaney is married and off on her own and she’s no longer the glue holding us together.”
Honey looked at him with those calm green eyes that revealed nothing about what she was really feeling. “I don’t know what you intend to do, but I’m planning on living my life exactly as I have been.”
“Filling it up with what? Charity events and Pilates and spa dates with your friends?”
“Why, yes.”
“Where do I fit into your plans?”
“What is it that you want from me?”
I want you to love me the way you used to!
He wanted to grab her by the shoulders and shake some feeling into her. But you couldn’t force people to feel something for you if they didn’t.
His chest constricted. “What happened, Honey? What happened to the girl I married? The one who had big dreams and an even bigger heart? The one who used to laugh at my jokes and let her hair down once in a while? The one who told me we were a team and as long as we were together, nothing could break us?”
She reached across the bed and stroked his cheek with her index finger, the unexpected tenderness in her eyes cutting straight to his heart. “Delaney’s grown now. We’rein our mid-fifties. What’s past is past. I can’t be something I no longer am, and I can’t bring Skylar back. Now please, can we just go to bed?”
He wanted to shout. He wanted to throw something against the wall. Anything to get her attention.
But he did not.
Jim Bob put the crossword puzzle aside, turned out the light, and slid down in bed. He reached for Honey and pulled her into his embrace. She did not resist, but she held her body so stiffly against him, he could take no comfort in her arms.
She was an ice queen. Beautiful, but untouchable. Impossible to know even after thirty-four years of marriage.
There was no getting through to her. He’d been trying for years. She had her idea of the way things were supposed to be, and Honey refused to budge. The terrible thing was, much as he still loved her, Jim Bob didn’t know if he could live with that anymore.
Divorce was an ugly word, but he was almost ready to say it.
When Honey had finally fallen asleep, Jim Bob got up, went to the closet, took out the wedding veil, and put it back underneath his daughter’s bed.
Someone in this family damn well deserved to hold on to their dreams.
On Monday, after seeing Evan off at the airport, Delaney guided her silver Acura south toward Galveston Island to meet Lucia Vinetti. Her mind wandered during the fifty-minute drive and for some inexplicable reason, she found herself thinking about the man she’d thrown the tarp over outside
“You didn’t deserve an alcoholic.”
“James Robert, you’ve been sober for fifteen years. It’s all in the past. Forget about it.”
“I’ll never be able to forget it. Or what I did to you and Delaney,” he said. “I haven’t really made full amends.”
“Yes, you have.”
“If I’d truly made amends then why haven’t you forgiven me? I’m so sorry I hurt you, Honey. So very sorry.”
“You’re forgiven. Now can we stop talking about this, please?”
“You should have divorced me.”
“I’m going to keep this veil,” she said, getting up and crossing the room to put the veil in her closet. “If Delaney wants it back, she’s going to have to ask me for it.”
It irritated him that she pretended to forgive him when he knew she hadn’t. She punished him every day. Like shewas doing now. By not allowing him to say what he needed to say. By dismissing his apology as inconsequential.
“I want things to be better between us,” Jim Bob said. “Like they used to be when we were first married. Remember?”
“Let’s go to sleep, James Robert. It’s late.”
“Stop changing the subject. I don’t want to talk about wedding veils. I want to talk about us. How we’re going to spend the rest of our lives once Delaney is married and off on her own and she’s no longer the glue holding us together.”
Honey looked at him with those calm green eyes that revealed nothing about what she was really feeling. “I don’t know what you intend to do, but I’m planning on living my life exactly as I have been.”
“Filling it up with what? Charity events and Pilates and spa dates with your friends?”
“Why, yes.”
“Where do I fit into your plans?”
“What is it that you want from me?”
I want you to love me the way you used to!
He wanted to grab her by the shoulders and shake some feeling into her. But you couldn’t force people to feel something for you if they didn’t.
His chest constricted. “What happened, Honey? What happened to the girl I married? The one who had big dreams and an even bigger heart? The one who used to laugh at my jokes and let her hair down once in a while? The one who told me we were a team and as long as we were together, nothing could break us?”
She reached across the bed and stroked his cheek with her index finger, the unexpected tenderness in her eyes cutting straight to his heart. “Delaney’s grown now. We’rein our mid-fifties. What’s past is past. I can’t be something I no longer am, and I can’t bring Skylar back. Now please, can we just go to bed?”
He wanted to shout. He wanted to throw something against the wall. Anything to get her attention.
But he did not.
Jim Bob put the crossword puzzle aside, turned out the light, and slid down in bed. He reached for Honey and pulled her into his embrace. She did not resist, but she held her body so stiffly against him, he could take no comfort in her arms.
She was an ice queen. Beautiful, but untouchable. Impossible to know even after thirty-four years of marriage.
There was no getting through to her. He’d been trying for years. She had her idea of the way things were supposed to be, and Honey refused to budge. The terrible thing was, much as he still loved her, Jim Bob didn’t know if he could live with that anymore.
Divorce was an ugly word, but he was almost ready to say it.
When Honey had finally fallen asleep, Jim Bob got up, went to the closet, took out the wedding veil, and put it back underneath his daughter’s bed.
Someone in this family damn well deserved to hold on to their dreams.
On Monday, after seeing Evan off at the airport, Delaney guided her silver Acura south toward Galveston Island to meet Lucia Vinetti. Her mind wandered during the fifty-minute drive and for some inexplicable reason, she found herself thinking about the man she’d thrown the tarp over outside
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