Read Online Killer in Crinolines by Duffy Brown - Free Book Online Page B
Authors: Duffy Brown
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launched forward, sea grasses whizzing by, KiKi’s fancy car neck and neck with the truck. If someone came in the opposite direction the Beemer was toast and my favorite auntie would kill me dead. Planning ahead for this very thing, I gripped the steering wheel with one hand and held the Sisters green-and-orange bag over the roof of the car. I made the bag do a little dance to get Chantilly’s attention, and sure enough the UPS truck slowed and coasted to a stop.
“What do you think you’re doing?” I slammed the car door and stomped my way toward the truck.
Chantilly looked like a crazed porcupine with curls, her hair sticking out in all directions from under her UPS hat. She made a grab for the Sisters bag, but I yanked it out of her reach. Her brow wrinkled and her lips thinned. “Bet you got fried chicken, yams, cabbage, and corn bread in that bag. The sisters make to-die-for corn bread.”
“And smothered pork chops and you only get it if I’m the one picking up the package at Waverly Farms.”
“That there’s blackmail pure and simple. Your mamma would have a stroke if she knew you were into blackmail. Besides, I’m fine as can be. Guess I could do with a doughnut.”
“You’ll have to get your own doughnut. Honey, you’re not yourself these days. You got everyone over at St. John’s Church in a tizzy, phones are ringing off the hook, Twitters are tweeting and it’s not even noon. If you meet up with Waynetta, you’ll fight like dogs over a bone, and your bail might get revoked and you’ll wind up in jail looking guiltier than ever.”
Chantilly eyed the bag and licked her lips. “I’m not sure I like you right now.”
“Give me the keys to the truck so I can pick up the package at Waverly Farms, I’ll give you the bag. No eating in the Beemer or KiKi will have a conniption.” I held the bag high. Chantilly squared her shoulders and did likewise with the truck keys. “On the count of three we swap,” I suggested.
Chantilly nodded; I counted and on
three
grabbed the keys and Chantilly grabbed the food. “You also have a pickup over at Icy’s fish house down by the docks,” Chantilly said around a mouthful of smothered pork chop, gravy coating her fingers. “Don’t mess it up,” she said between licks. “I’ll get fired for sure. My boss is on his last nerve with me.”
“Gee, imagine that.” I peeled Chantilly’s hat off her head deciding that since I had on a brown Gap T-shirt, the hat was all the UPS uniform I really needed. Gap, UPS—letters were letters, no one paid attention. I climbed in the truck and took off.
Sitting on a log and munching corn bread, Chantilly waved a bye-bye pork chop at me, then faded into the distance. Waverly Farms forked left and I followed the painted plank fence to the big white house, fountain splashing in the front. I killed the engine and jumped off the truck just like a real UPS person as Reese Waverly shouldered his rifle and took aim. Holy mother-of-pearl! And here I thought everyone loved UPS!
I considered diving under the truck to take cover but realized Mr. Got-bucks wasn’t aiming at me but a life-size cutout of Simon propped against the fence. A shot rang out, leaving a hole right smack in the middle of Simon’s forehead. There was dead and real dead. What did Simon do to have Reese Waverly taking potshots at him when he was already at the morgue?
“Pickup is around back,” Waynetta said from behind, making me jump. Gunshots will do that to a person. Waynetta had on a yellow cotton skirt, white blouse, pearls, and the tiara she’d won as Miss Peaches-and-Cream some years ago. I figured that her self-esteem must be in need a little boost after the wedding from hell, but this wasn’t exactly a picture of a grieving bride.
“I’ll get the package and be on my way,” I said.
Waynetta gave me the
I can do anything better than you
look that she did so well. It was the have and have-nots of the tiara world and a UPS driver
“What do you think you’re doing?” I slammed the car door and stomped my way toward the truck.
Chantilly looked like a crazed porcupine with curls, her hair sticking out in all directions from under her UPS hat. She made a grab for the Sisters bag, but I yanked it out of her reach. Her brow wrinkled and her lips thinned. “Bet you got fried chicken, yams, cabbage, and corn bread in that bag. The sisters make to-die-for corn bread.”
“And smothered pork chops and you only get it if I’m the one picking up the package at Waverly Farms.”
“That there’s blackmail pure and simple. Your mamma would have a stroke if she knew you were into blackmail. Besides, I’m fine as can be. Guess I could do with a doughnut.”
“You’ll have to get your own doughnut. Honey, you’re not yourself these days. You got everyone over at St. John’s Church in a tizzy, phones are ringing off the hook, Twitters are tweeting and it’s not even noon. If you meet up with Waynetta, you’ll fight like dogs over a bone, and your bail might get revoked and you’ll wind up in jail looking guiltier than ever.”
Chantilly eyed the bag and licked her lips. “I’m not sure I like you right now.”
“Give me the keys to the truck so I can pick up the package at Waverly Farms, I’ll give you the bag. No eating in the Beemer or KiKi will have a conniption.” I held the bag high. Chantilly squared her shoulders and did likewise with the truck keys. “On the count of three we swap,” I suggested.
Chantilly nodded; I counted and on
three
grabbed the keys and Chantilly grabbed the food. “You also have a pickup over at Icy’s fish house down by the docks,” Chantilly said around a mouthful of smothered pork chop, gravy coating her fingers. “Don’t mess it up,” she said between licks. “I’ll get fired for sure. My boss is on his last nerve with me.”
“Gee, imagine that.” I peeled Chantilly’s hat off her head deciding that since I had on a brown Gap T-shirt, the hat was all the UPS uniform I really needed. Gap, UPS—letters were letters, no one paid attention. I climbed in the truck and took off.
Sitting on a log and munching corn bread, Chantilly waved a bye-bye pork chop at me, then faded into the distance. Waverly Farms forked left and I followed the painted plank fence to the big white house, fountain splashing in the front. I killed the engine and jumped off the truck just like a real UPS person as Reese Waverly shouldered his rifle and took aim. Holy mother-of-pearl! And here I thought everyone loved UPS!
I considered diving under the truck to take cover but realized Mr. Got-bucks wasn’t aiming at me but a life-size cutout of Simon propped against the fence. A shot rang out, leaving a hole right smack in the middle of Simon’s forehead. There was dead and real dead. What did Simon do to have Reese Waverly taking potshots at him when he was already at the morgue?
“Pickup is around back,” Waynetta said from behind, making me jump. Gunshots will do that to a person. Waynetta had on a yellow cotton skirt, white blouse, pearls, and the tiara she’d won as Miss Peaches-and-Cream some years ago. I figured that her self-esteem must be in need a little boost after the wedding from hell, but this wasn’t exactly a picture of a grieving bride.
“I’ll get the package and be on my way,” I said.
Waynetta gave me the
I can do anything better than you
look that she did so well. It was the have and have-nots of the tiara world and a UPS driver
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